Specific Issue Order

[Babynumberone369]

Hello

Has anyone been to court for a specific issue order to go on holiday please?

My ex has refused to let me go on holiday with my 2 year old first week in April. It's to Tenerife for a week with my over 80 year old mum. My dd lives with me and dad sees her twice a week.

We don't have a CAO and been to mediation once. My solicitor advised we don't have time to wait for a second mediation session as the dad is very busy at work at the moment 🙄😕

Is the court quite focused on the issue, not the whole sorry story surrounding it?

Thank you!

The court will simply deal with the holiday only, if that's the only issue. It certainly needs issuing now as you have very little time. You need to flag it as urgent and explain why in the application.

Thank you @Collaborate

Hi my daughter is intending to go on holiday this year. Her ex is refusing to allow their daughter to go because holiday falls on his contact weekend. There is a CAO, PSO and child is to reside with mum. Missed contact makeup has been offered but father is adamant that she is not going. This is third occasion that when going on holiday he refuses and court proceedings have to be made. Mediation is been arranged however can a judge refuse specific order application because the holiday is on fathers contact weekend? Daughter will be away for 12 nights in total!!

@Bimgal50 I'm sorry your daughters going through it too. She doesn't need to go through mediation first, as it's a holiday the application can be made on an urgent basis so she can bypass it. Unless she thinks it will help in which case better to do it!
99% sure the court will give her an order for the holiday, it's in the child's best interests and doesnt look good on dad. Good luck!

Thanks....we keep seeing conflicting information that says you have to do meditation first before specific issue application. The holiday is at the end of the year however father was notified in December 23 and refused even before full holiday dates given. He's not compliant with court order has breached order and PSO and is toxic in his attitude towards my daughter. Tells her who should or shouldn't be around when he calls to speak to his daughter. It's a really stressful situation and just want clarity....and some peace. They both have parental responsibility however cao states child resides with mum. So father is aware that permission is not needed for her to go on holiday but as it's his contact weekend he is unwilling to compromise and the fact that she cannot go any other time because of the school term

The requirement is to attend a Mediation, Information and Assessment Meeting, not to actually attempt mediation. There are a number of exemptions, one of which is for urgent applications.

Oh ok thanks

@Babynumberone369

Hope you don't mind me jumping on your thread but I was wondering how you got on applying for a SIO? Am unfortunately in same position with ex refusing consent for a teen, who lives with me full time. Has openly admitted it is vindictive (🙄). Have MIAM booked - a pointless exercise! - then will apply as an urgent case. Possibly a stupid Q but will ex also be required to attend court? Any info you can share about the hearing would be really helpful. Is it quite quick? I'd love to put an order for costs against him for wasting court time and maliciously causing undue emotional harm to my child - not to mention racking up unnecessary legal costs for me with MIAM and court fee. There seems to be no consequence for malicious intent which does not seem right.

Hi There, completely understand how you feel. My daughter has made her court application and has the cout hearing in 2 wks time. She did ask for it to be an urgent hearing hearing without notice, but this was rejected. I suspect because she had given father a years notice of her intention to travel. Her MIAM sessions where pointless as father used the time to rake over issues that had already passed and with slot if lies and exaggerated events. Unfortunately you and your ex will have to attend court unless thihe hearing can be done via Teams. It's so unfair when exs behave vindictive and the costs of court applications cannot be claimed back or any recompense from the fathers due to their vindictive behaviour. Also if you have a child arrangement order (CAO) and if both parents have parental responsibility that specifically says that your child is to live and reside with you, then you don't need permission to take the child out of the country unless you are going for more than 28 days. However if, like my daughters ex, they are been vindictive for no reason, then in your court application add this and any correspondence to back up your application and your anything showing your ex's objection and the reasons why. The judge will then make the necessary decision based on the information provided. Hope this helps and good luck.

@Bimgal501

Thank you for replying! No CAO as children too old. We did mediation for financial resolution and ended up at final hearing for that so this is my second MIAM (I checked and a second is needed) Grrr. I wish you could cite previous unsuccessful mediation as a reason for exemption. Ex was raked over the coals by judge then and I hope will be again. He's helpfully provided an email confirming his reasons for lack of consent, which amount to him still being angry about the divorce outcome and the fact the kids (two now uni age!) do not wish to live with him or go on holiday with him. No genuine concern for wellbeing or safety which I imagine would be the only factors a court would be concerned about. I'm hoping our child as an older teen can attend court and advocate for themselves about the impact of non consent. Urgh to another court hearing with ex though. It's taken me long enough to get over the last one. Hope your daughter gets on ok with it all and has a happy outcome. 🤞

Wish these ex's would get over the fact that relationships come to end and just focus on the children. My daughter has been going through this for the last 5 years. Father even disputing how much child maintenance he had to pay(was paying £30 per month) but now has a job so had increased. Has asked my daughter to take him off CM. He provides nothing for her but demands the most. Wish judges and courts could see these men for what they really are.... control and narcissistic!!

Was reassured by my solicitor that the judge will take a very dim view of such a blatantly malicious move. The only two considerations the court are interested in are whether there is a risk of child abduction or danger (eg if the destination is on the FCO red list). Otherwise there is no case and they absolutely can order costs against them, including MIAM cost! 🤜 Hope this gives your daughter encouragement!

Thanks for the kind words, and can only hope that we get the results we are asking for. The destination is not on the FCO list nor is there risk of abduction. The destination is the home of both my daughter and her ex and is a yearly family vacation. This is the 3rd holiday that he has objected to with absolutely no reason other than to be disruptive and vindictive. The holiday is for 10 days and he's known bout it since December 2024 as at that time he had his court ordered contact for the Christmas period and was to bring her back so that my daughter could spend the latter part of the Xmas holiday. However her ex emailed to say he was keeping her for the whole of the Xmas and new year period therefore my daughter had no time with her daughter over the festive season as he brought her back in time for school. He ignored my daughters request to return her and in doing so breached a PSO which is in place since August 22 because he did the same then. We are constantly battling with her ex's unreasonable demands and behaviour. When he returned her in January he then didn't have physical contact with her til April only phone contact. Court order states he is to have fortnightly contact. It's wasting court time and resources when you have to make costly court applications to deal with situations that can easily be made between both parties. Wish us luck 🤞

Does your daughter have a CAO naming her as someone with whom her daughter is to live? If she does, she can take her child out of the country for up to one month without needing his consent. If she doesn't, she should seriously consider getting one rather than having to go to court every time she wants to take a holiday.

Late to the thread but, if it helps, I was in Family Court for years with ex (he was a manipulative, alcoholic drug addict who was extremely violent). At that time the court docs stated that parents could take their child away and out of the country for up to a month without permission. More than that and I would have had to ask. I can't see any judge objecting to a week's holiday during half-term

Sorry cross post with @prh47bridge who knows the legal terms!

Yes CAO in place and yes she is to reside with my daughter. The issue is it's my granddaughters birthday on the day she goes on holiday. BUT this year is my daughters Christmas contact as they are supposed to alternate each year. However Dec 2023 he kept her from 22nd dec and returned her on 7th January 2024 therefore denying my daughter any time with her daughter over the festive season. So she notified him that as he had that time that she would like to have the same opportunity this year. Instead he objected without even knowing the dates and is now using the fact that because it's her birthday and he's Never spent a birthday with her that he is demanding that my granddaughter Will be spending it with him. The difficulty also lies with the fact that they live in different towns too. However he has had opportunities in the past to spend time with her on her birthdays but has not taken up the offer. Now instead he's demanded my granddaughters passport and not given a reason why he wants it. It's all a bit sad because he's not thinking about my granddaughters happiness. He's sole focus is to disrupt and be a nuisance to anybody that will listen to his sob story yet does not provide anything really financially and is even asking for CM to be reduced cuz he has her every fortnight but has not had her since the Easter half term and cancels with less than 24 hours notice. My daughter works so him cancelling also disrupts her work schedule. Luckily she has a good support network in her home town which is something he resents because she returned home after having my granddaughter. He's threatened her previous nursery with OFSTED because they wouldn't allow him to pick her up b3 the court ordered time now he's carrying on a similar way at her school. We're exasperated with this man

@Bimgal501 just wondered how your daughter got on with her court hearing for the SIO? Hope it went well. I have mine coming up and not sure what to expect. I know my ex will try to hijack it with his many perceived gripes but hoping the judge will shut those down quickly and stick to what is relevant. 😬

The hearing went well.... because after all the bravado and mind games the father did not turn up so the hearing took place in his absence. And my daughter got what she applied for.
Judges tend to look past all the silly tricks that some of these so called dad's try to play. Stick to the facts and don't be swayed by the games and intimidating behaviour they may try. Have all your evidence and make your notes on what u want to get across. Remember the hearing may only be for an hour. Good luck and stay strong.