Please help - divorcing disaster

[notsorighteousthesedays]

Husband left in November 18, got a decree nisi in August last year. Have had to go for financial remedy as will not communicate except through his Solicitors, I am not legally represented.

First hearing was due 31/10/23 and I am a complete mess physically and mentally, I managed yo send the Form E and most documents in time but had to admit defeat on 22/10 - I would not be ready - I posted a letter to the court (6.45 am) on 23/10 asking for this meeting to be rearranged and emailed his solicitor on 24/10 saying I had done this.

On 1/11 I got an email from his solicitor saying thay had gone to the meeting and the judge was angry that I had not turned up and was being fined.

I wrote to the court again (I have no other means of contact)!the same day explaining what I had done.

Today I have received another email from his solicitor with a document saying once again that I had not notified the court that I would not be there and that I am in all sorts of trouble.

What do I do?

Why is everything coming via his solicitor - isn't that a conflict of interest. Is there anyone I can speak to to find out why the judge was not told I had asked for a delay?
I honestly feel desperate....

this may not get the 'wastage' costs removed but will at least make it clear that I did abide by the rules.

what were “the rules”? And if you complied with this fully, why would the wastage costs not be removed?

When solicitors are representing a client against a litigant in person (which you are), they have to bend over backwards to ensure the LIP is informed of significant developments in the case. It is not a conflict of interest for them to be providing you with information about what has happened in hearings you weren't present at; quite the reverse.

I would suggest obtaining an email address for the judge's clerk and communicating through that rather than by post.

The person I spoke to will raise the issue with a DJ today/tomorrow when he gets the chance - this may not get the 'wastage' costs removed but will at least make it clear that I did abide by the rules.

Unfortunately you didn't really. You asked for an adjournment but you weren't granted one so you should still have attended. I hope the judge will be lenient on you.

If uou can get some medical evidence of your mental health issues to send to court as well to explain why you funny attend and are having difficulty complying with the orders - that may help you too. But I'd suggest you also try and find another solicitor

Oh I didn't see it was an older thread. Apologies

That is an absolute no-no for doctors. We are not allowed to interfere in court processes - otherwise everybody with an upcoming court appearance would just ask for a sick note.

The OP's GP can give her a copy of her records to show any mental health diagnoses, but the GP absolutely cannot instruct the court about what to do with that information.

I was probably replying too quickly but I just meant for the doctors to provide proof of themental health conditions in OPs record. It is for the OP to then tell the court how these have affected her.

Gotcha - yes, she could do that.