ExH redundancy

[GlobalPymtWorry]

My friend got divorced just over a year ago with a global payment due for 5 years. This includes child maintenance and spousal maintenance and is 50% of exH monthly wage after tax (3.5k). They have 2 school aged children and friend currently works self employed PT (about 9 hours a week). Friend has the children all the time bar every other weekend. The divorce settlement was 75/25 in her favour.
ExH has just been told he is being made redundant. He hasn’t been told his package but he suspects it to be around £30k. He has just dropped the bombshell he wants to look for a lesser paying job with less hours as he wants to see the children more. He will likely earn around 60-70k in a new role. Are the global payments valid for the 5 years stated in the consent order? He has said not having the children has had an awful impact on his MH. He will apply for a variation order once he has a new role as won’t be able to afford the current payment. Her head is spinning as she thought she had 5 years to get herself on her feet.

The payments can be reevaluated after a year. He will probably get 50/50 access if he tries for it and on a 60k ish salary spousal will end and maintenance might be taken to £0 too. She needs to start planning how to get her own income ASAP.

They have 2 school aged children and friend currently works self employed PT (about 9 hours a week). Friend has the children all the time bar every other weekend. The divorce settlement was 75/25 in her favour.

She needs to start working on her career - She's had a year to get working more than 9 hours a week

Is there a reason she only works 9 hours a week?

the role is PT and doesn’t have the option of more hours. She doesn’t want to put her children into childcare as feels this will be unsettling as she has always been the SAHP and to be honest she gets enough money of her exH to not need to work more hours.
I know she will be flamed for this and it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, but she feels this is her entitlement.

Well clearly it’s not her entitlement. Is this a reverse and you are the exDH? I can’t imagine your friend/any woman being so idiotic. Life is full of unsettling events - doing longer hours of childcare is hardly a disaster is it!

Your friend needs to get FT work and cut her cloth and stop expecting her ex to bail her out. He has every right to want 50:50 access to his children.

It’ll probably go back to court, he’ll be awarded more custody (not necessarily 50/50) but she might be entitled to some of his redundancy payout. He’s entitled to want a better work/life balance and she’ll have to get a job.

3.5k is her payment or she gets 50% of this?
Am assuming her panic is she burns through this expecting to still get her previous lifestyle met without having to do anything herself?
Zero sympathy for her in this!

He may delay getting a new role and live off the redundancy money whilst he applies for a variation order. Which means with no income he may get a nil award.

Very likely he'll go for 50/50.

Your friend needs to get a FT job as soon as possible.

I promise it's not a reverse. This is the situation she finds herself in. I wanted a balanced view so I can try and support her with what to expect. She has been used to a certain way of living and understandably wants to hang on to it and is frightened for her future. She can't earn the same kind of money as her exH and thought she had 5 years to work out a plan.

She gets 3.5k per month that was to reduce to 2k after 5 years (4 years now) as a child maintenance payment until each child gets to 18. They are both primary aged. She got the house in the settlement so wasn't thinking about working until the children were more independent.

What steps has she taken so far in the last year to improve her career prospects?

Or was she going to decide that over the next 4 years?

She has looked into some qualifications and has the intention of starting a course next September. She didn’t want to do it before now as her focus has been getting the children to adjust to the new normal. She called off the marriage and very much lives the same life just minus her exH. She feels she supported him to get to where he is in his career and he has a responsibility to her as she had no space to work on her own career path. She doesn’t want to just do any old job and won’t be able to earn much.

He is entitled to change his work commitments to have more time with his children. He has every right to his children as much as your friend.
She's been very fortunate to be able work only 9 hrs per week. I don't know anyone who has children that don't both work full time and have to use child care. Any arrangements regarding CMS and custody should be based on what's best for the children. Sounds like your friend is more concerned about her own personal benefit.

She has to suck it up like everyone else.

You seem to know a lot of detail about your ‘friends’ and husbands finances / the details.

If your ‘friend’ has school aged children, there’s absolutely no reason she can’t up her hours to start supporting herself. Absolutely ridiculous that she only works 9 hours a week. The 1950’s have long gone & women can support themselves nowadays. Absolutely no reason to beholden to a man (who no longer has responsibility for HER).

That’s great the father wants to spend more time with his own children. Let’s hope she doesn’t try to stop contact to get more maintenance.

As it’s a year since the consent order has passed he can apply to the CMS for them to assess / vary CM.

The minute they split she should have been working on being financially independent. No one needs 5 years.

I'm assuming new partner?

Your friend has had a year to fanny about. Many divorced parents don't get that opportunity. Now she needs to balance the demands of bringing up children with the obligation to earn money and support them, just like millions of other parents.

No new partner in either side. I do know a lot about it as I have supported her for the last 2 years whilst she has navigated the divorce and tried to be a friend. I don’t agree with everything she has done during or since and I think she should be financially independent. But she isn’t and she is my friend and she is scared shitless she is going to loose her children and her house. I just wanted to know if she has a consent order for 5 years if that had to be honoured. Her consent order entitles her to another £168k of payments (3.5x 12 x 4) and she thinks she is entitled to that money as agreed during her divorce. I didn’t think she was as it can be adjusted after a year but she is adamant

I just wanted to know if she has a consent order for 5 years if that had to be honoured. Her consent order entitles her to another £168k of payments (3.5x 12 x 4) and she thinks she is entitled to that money as agreed during her divorce.

I don't know the answer for sure here. I think, if she is so convinced that she is entitled to that, regardless of the change of circumstance and she isn't listening to you, get her to contact a lawyer who will confirm for her, what her options are. It may be that she might have a claim on part of his Redundancy payment?

But she needs to get her head out of the sand. I completely understand how much of a shock this is to her and it must be very hard at the upcoming change in circumstances she is facing, but it happens to many thousands of people (usually and mainly women) and she is going to have to face reality and cut her cloth accordingly. We all want certain things - but reality is that for many/most of us we can't always have it

@GlobalPymtWorry You said she got the house, but also that she is worried that she will lose it. Is it paid off or does it have a Mortgage still on it, and who pays that? It is possible that she may qualify for SOME benefits, depending what happens with the new payment/nil payment from her ex, but she needs to get herself a job ASAP. The kids are at school which should help enormously

Very obvious.

The original post refers to 'global maintenance', and therefore only the court can change the order.

On 3.5k a month, your friend can afford to pay a lawyer for a couple of hours discussion.

This can't be right if it's in the UK.
The payments aren't allowed to be as high as 50%.

What do you mean she’s worried she’ll “lose her children”?!

the 50% is basic wage. She isn’t entitled to any bonus as waived the right to get this. I’m not sure if that makes a difference but don’t think she is lying? It is the UK. Also he pays tax on his wage before she gets it if that makes a difference. It’s broken down as a payment per child and spousal for her and is a ‘global payment’.
She got 75/25 split. She had to mortgage the 25% to get him off the mortgage. That mortgage was agreed on the basis of her global payment. So if she has to live off her own wage she can’t cover her payments.
I agree I do think she does need to get professional help. What a mess.

She's had a year and done nothing. She sat on her laurels. Now she needs a job and childcare PDQ. Hopefully she saved a lot.

Her old way of life is DED. Welcome to single mum life.

She could always sell her house, pay off the mortgage and downsize to be mortgage free. It doesn’t sound like the house value is at the lower end of the market TBH.