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Harassed by long term ex - police won’t help

6 replies

seekingguidence92 · 22/10/2023 18:46

Hello, I’m 33 weeks pregnant. My long term ex (we separated 6 years ago) for context he was violent, abusive, narc , sex addict beat me down so much during our relationship. He owed me a substantial sum of money so I had to keep talking to him until about 3 years ago when I got the majority back. I’ve maintained being civil with occasion messages because he’s very stressful to deal with. He Had a big downfall from Grace after being very publicly successful and now living in council accommodation.
anyway my career is now very public and he could perceive that I’m doing very well. He has always been possessive and jealous / despite having two children since we separated with a Woman he cheated on me with. The last six months he’s somehow found out I’m in a relationship and has sent me emails / whatsap and texts blackmailing me for large sums of money, threatening to expose naked pictures of me. Has contacted my partner twice and sent a sexual harassment malicious email in to my partners place of work.
All of the above was reported to the police and the crown prosecution service deemed there not to be enough evidence to prosecute despite 30 screen shots of all of the above. My one reply was me asking him to leave me alone.
he was questioned by police during this process in relation to harassment and stalking of me. He told police he didn’t have a phone and didn’t bring it with him as he was pre warned about his interview.

his latest move is to set up an anon Instagram account and detail some true and untrue but totally private details of our sex life to my partner. Which was very painful for us both.
police are still not helping and I’m worried what he will do next. I had even shown old messages to the police where I had put in writing his verbal threats to kill me and photos of injuries he had given during violent spells.
what else can I do? He knows where I live, I have no idea where he lives. How can pages of evidence - when the law says only two required - not quantify as being enough? He also doesn’t know I’m having a baby and if he ever found this out would be even worse. I’m even considering moving to a new house and area but despite this he knows where I work.
the justice system seems to be so bad in this country.

OP posts:
Collaborate · 22/10/2023 22:53

There are certainly grounds to apply for a non-molestation order there. Speak to a family solicitor about getting one.

ThePoshUns · 22/10/2023 22:56

The police did help , it was the CPS who decided not to prosecute him.
Definitely seek a non mol order

trythisforsize · 22/10/2023 23:00

errrr . . . . . block him?

Mumof3confused · 25/10/2023 22:47

Apply for a non-molestation order. This will give the police the power of arrest.

Nonass · 27/10/2023 02:04

I am sorry you are going through this, it must be so stressful and as usual these people seem to have a nose for when you are at your most vulnerable. I agree that it feels like you have little support, partly because the police or rather the CPS seem to have to wait until the perpetrator has 'done something' that they can easily prosecute him for. It feels wrong when proactivity is what we all need to feel safe, otherwise we feel under seige.
I hope the suggestion of a non molestation order works. At some point he may move his attention elsewhere, when someone else p*** him off. I knew someone once who actually said he "always had to have someone to hate". He worked for me and turned his wrath on me after I pulled him up for bullying someone else. He left her completely alone and I became 'it'. He was one disturbed guy. I trust in karma though. Good luck. Sorry I can't be of more help.

Ladolcevita233 · 27/12/2023 23:15

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