Dad signed documents and doesn’t remember…

[nzhuntawa]

Dad 84 with terminal illness and severe short-term cognitive memory issues (awaiting formal diagnosis) has signed documents presented to him by his young Thai wife. I have proof courtesy of a camera (legality of this has been researched and all above board as long as I don’t share with a third party) . Questioned Dad about documents and he doesn’t remember signing anything. Asked his Thai wife verbally and now three times in writing (for her to have translated) as suddenly her English is bad and now I have to send everything to a translator. I have Lasting Power of Attorney which was activated upon registering. If I ask Dad to ask her he forgets as she now leaves the house when I visit. Just to confirm Dad also wants to see the documents. Where do I go from here? Formal Solicitors letter? Would the Police take any action? Any ideas anyone?

Google Adult Safeguarding for your area and raise a Safeguarding concern - possible financial abuse.

I'm sorry to be cat's bum mouth about this but she's his wife. Not his 'Thai wife'.

Capacity is everything. If he has capacity no one will do anything. Contact the council via safeguarding and they can do a capacity assessment.

Will look into the Safeguarding. As for the Thai wife description, I was just trying to get across the language barrier difficulties, apologies if I have offended.

How long have they been married for? Did he have capacity when they met/married?

The usage of 'Thai wife' is oft meant to indicate the grimness of Western men either going abroad or online to purchase young women as a bride. Is this what you mean your dad did, or does his wife happen to come from Thailand?

Married 10 years, although he has only just added her onto his bank account. Yes, he had capacity when he married her.

She was not “purchased” she happens to come from Thailand and she happens to be 32 years younger than him…

Try the Hourglass helpline for advice - safer ageing organisation on government websites.

It is quite possible for someone with mental capacity to be abused. However, it's true that your dad may back down from actually accusing his wife of anything, and if he has capacity to make that decision, there may be less to be done. However, he might still agree to have some more protection put in place.

In the same way, I can believe that there is an element of abuse here, it's sadly very common. I'd support you taking action to protect your dad. However, that doesn't stop you being prejudiced against his wife of ten years, and I'd encourage you to think clearly what you think your dad really wants - he married her after all, and no doubt wants her to be ok.

What a tricky situation. It may be that she quite legitimately wanted to be sure she was financially protected once your Dad dies or it may be that she is up to something sketchy? Do you know what is in his will? If he is leaving her everything then maybe there is less reason for her to be up to no good. Are you able to check his accounts and house deeds etc? Might she have taken a loan out with him as guarantor or with him as the person taking out the loan?
Do you have access to his computer and passwords etc? (If he uses one)
What about the post? Can you get post that is for him redirected to your house by Royal Mail?
If you have POA then you should be able to access a lot of relevant info.

But if they have been married for 10 years already how recent is his will? If there isn't one she will inherit the whole estate.

Bleurgh 🤮 42 and 74

And now 52 and 84...

No wonder she wants money - clearly she played a very long game

Only if the estate is worth no more than £270k (assuming he is in England or Wales). If the estate is worth more than that, she gets half of anything over £270k and the other half is split between OP and her siblings (if any).