POA

[Hoppinggreen]

My Mum died recently and she had POA for health and finances in place for her partner. He has dementia but copes ok so she hadn’t invoked it.
It was set up so that if she died before him myself and DH took it over, which we knew.
His daughter has now found out about it and she is unhappy about it and is talking about getting him to do a new one now, however his condition has deteriorated in the last 6 years since the POA was taken out. He is now on medication for Alzheimer’s and attends a memory clinic, plus my Mum used to direct him a lot.
Is the daughter likely to be able to overthrow the POAs and if she tried would I be informed?
She is wealthy but incredibly grabby - one of the first things she said when my Mum died was that all the money in the joint account was her Dads now and we couldn’t touch it. She seems to assume that everyone is as grabby as she is and when I went over to my Mums house to get some paperwork she was there with her Dad and spent the whole time telling me what I couldn’t touch it as it was her Dads. This was 2 days after my Mum died and the first time I had been to her house, which was very hard.
I have no interest in any of her Dads possessions and would never try to take anything of his, I haven’t even taken anything of my Mums as I don’t have probate yet.
The other issue is that in my Mums will he can stay in the house as long as he wants and I am absolutely fine with this as long as he is safe he happy there but I am not sure he is capable of living independently. If he hits crisis point I may need the POA to keep him safe - he has periods of staying in bed and not washing or eating for days until my Mum used to give him a bollocking! She was in hospital last month and he got into quite a state
His daughter lives several hundred miles away and assumes we will take on all his life admin. She refuses to believe he needs help (but I imagine it’s financial again) and while I will help to a certain extent I don’t want to be responsible for him UNLESS I am fully responsible under the POA, which is the nuclear option.
Any advice?

This sounds very difficult and given the daughters behaviour, a recipe for terrible
conflict. I gather you and DH are
named as replacement attorneys on the POA document then? Are you happy to take this on? It will commit you to a large amount of work in the middle of grieving for your mother. If he’s found to have lost capacity he can’t appoint someone else now. I guess you could look at renouncing and handing it over to a professional if you can’t face it.

She was, of course, correct that any money in the joint account passed to her father automatically.

She cannot change the POA but he can, provided he has mental capacity.

Is the house in your mum’s name, and if so has she left him a life interest but left the house to you? Does his daughter know that?

I know she’s right but it really wasn’t the time

Yes that’s correct and she does know.
I am completely happy for him to stay there, it is his home. However, the issue is that she is in denial about his ability to cope on his own and at some point in the future it may not be safe for him to stay without considerable support.

When and if it’s necessary I will be happy to take it on.
I would be surprised if he has capacity to do a new POA now but I dint feel I need to invoke the existing one at the moment.
My concern is his daughter will try to get him to do a new one as she may not act in his best interest- if he believed she would I feel he would have appointed her rather than me

You could contact the Office of the Public Guardian for advice? If he’s borderline it will ultimately depend on whether a trusted person eg GP is willing to say he has capacity and sign any further POA document.