Father trying to manipulate child to stay more

[Katierose34]

I have 2 kids, age 14 and 12. Court order in place and 12yo stays with dad overnight 5 nights in a fortnight, split into 3 nights one week and 2 nights the other.
Made massive mistake of letting 14yr old permanently live with dad at age of 12 as he was physically abusive to myself and siblings, still see him regularly but he generally had the say in when he comes.
Now dad is increasing pressure for 12yo to stay more, 12 yo doesn't want to. Dad promises things, doesn't deliver, when he does have him dad is often busy doing other things with other people and child is at grandparents or at a friend's.
I know I have to deal with the pressure of 'things have to change as they get older' and dad says 'nothing set in stone', except it is actually, there is a court order in place until child is 16, so I just keep reminding dad if things are changing you will need to take it to court. AIBU?

Yanbu. Your child is old enough to decide. If they're happy with the current arrangement then no point forcing them. If he goes back to court they will listen to your child's wishes.

As child is 12 they will be listened to. Explain to Dc that the court order says 5/14 and that’s in force. If they don’t want to change, they don’t have to. You don’t have to agree to voluntarily offer more either. Make sure Dc understands that no means no. Try and set up activities when dad puts pressure on! Then you will both be busy.