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Is it stalking if a delivery man searches your name on Facebook and messages you??

60 replies

Shoot4theMoon · 05/02/2023 10:21

There was a delivery driver form DPD and I’d have him often delivering my parcels he would always try to chat and keep me chatting we were of a similar age but like I’m not interested. I then got a random message request off some guy I didn’t recognise the name the message said hi how’s you so I replied saying who is this? Do I know you? His reply was I’ll give you a guess….. I work for DPD and I’m often at your house. I then knew! I asked how he found me did we have friends in common? No he said he just searched my name from on the parcels and found out. I haven’t messaged back and I don’t want to get him in trouble but is this stalking ? Is there some law to what he’s done ?

OP posts:
TeenDivided · 05/02/2023 10:23

IANAL

I'd be surprised if a single contact would count as stalking.
Surely all you need to do is to contact him saying 'not interested, please don't contact me privately again'?

Casilero · 05/02/2023 10:26

Don't know if he's broken a law but it's very creepy and probably against DPDs rules. Can you tighten your settings so that strangers can't message you? I don't use my real name on anything online as I've had a stalker for 10 years now and it surprised me at the beginning just how easy it was for her to find out my address, my employers address, my kids achool all from online activity.

Sunbird24 · 05/02/2023 10:27

It’s probably not stalking but it’s definitely inappropriate use of your personal information. You might not want to get him in trouble, but you really need to report it to DPD.

BananaHamhock · 05/02/2023 10:27

No it's not stalking. But it is creepy. He probably doesn't mean any harm and was just trying to make contact because he likes you and didn't understand the level of creepiness it's on.

I would just brush it off with the outward appearance of being fairly casual about it and maybe say something like "I don't think my boyfriend / husband" would like knowing you've contacted me and hope he gets the idea without making a bad relationship between you two because he is someone you see fairly regularly.

If he doesn't get the hint then I would be a bit more strict and potentially contact DPD if he doesn't leave you alone

FenghuangHoyan · 05/02/2023 10:28

It's not stalking, but it's probably a breach of privacy and it's certainly a breach of gdpr as he's using data within his workplace for a purpose it wasn't intended. He can get fired and his firm can get heavily penalised.

maddy68 · 05/02/2023 10:29

You have put your findable details on a social media site. It's not illegal it is a bit creepy though. If you are interested then reply. If you aren't say please don't contact me again a s block him

Christmascracker0 · 05/02/2023 10:31

Take screenshots, block him and complain to DPD.

I think there were similar cases in the press over the lockdowns of employees messaging women with details left for track and trace? It’s so inappropriate!

SomePosters · 05/02/2023 10:34

Its not stalking but you should screenshot messages and report him to dpd.

you won’t be the only one this chancers done it to.

Changingplace · 05/02/2023 10:35

I don’t think it’s stalking but it’s definitely inappropriate and he shouldn’t be searching customers on social media.

I’d reply to say you’re not interested and please don’t contact me again and block him.

Personally I wouldn’t report it to his work, but if he contacts you again in some way after you’ve told him not to I would. I think his work would take a very dim view of this!

skilpadde · 05/02/2023 10:36

It's not stalking, but it is creepy.

The issue is that his knowledge of your name and address are due to his job. He should not be taking or using data obtained at work for his personal interest/benefit. Report it to his employer.

GrumpyPanda · 05/02/2023 10:40

To those saying don't report to the employer, just how do you imagine OP will be feeling on future deliveries? She needs this creep reassigned from her route.

EthicalNonMahogany · 05/02/2023 10:44

Um... put his name and the message on twitter and tag DPD it's absolutely against the rules for him to use your personal data, which he saw at work (technically processed it, on behalf of DPD) for a reason not connected with his job. There is a massive problem with this in deliveries and there is lots on social media about it. It is a red flag for other predatory behaviours, DV etc - brands need to be made aware of it as a HUGE reputational shitshow so they can clamp down on it. He should lose his job.

Flamingle18 · 05/02/2023 10:47

I had this with someone fitting my gas meter. He texted me of his personal number asking me out and had got my number through work. I very clearly stated I was not interested and that how he got my number was a massive breach. He apologised but said if you don't ask, you don't get. I didn't think I'd ever have to see him again so didn't report him but when my meter wasn't working properly it was him that came out again. It was so awkward. He couldn't look at me and just mumbled what work he has done and left. If you are going to feel uncomfortable everyone you know you have a parcel coming then say something to DPD

DRS1970 · 05/02/2023 10:51

It isn't stalking at present. But pretty certain he has breached data protection rules, which is very serious.

LadyJ2023 · 05/02/2023 10:55

Not report him are you serious. He needs reported, he has gone beyond data protection. Regardless of your details being in public he only found you from his parcel name and address. Its weird and I would be reporting immediately. I dont care about his job he has broken the rules and who knows if just messaging is what he's capable of!

Littlegoth · 05/02/2023 10:59

It’s a breach of GDPR and is a sackable offence. I work in HR.

FourAndTwentyBlackbirdsBakedInAPie · 05/02/2023 11:01

He should absolutely be reported, however I would be hesitant to as he knows where you live.

The most important thing here is your safety, so report if you feel comfortable doing that, but if you feel unsafe then don't be pressured into anything.

XanaduKira · 05/02/2023 11:02

I'd screenshot and report to DPD. Thats completely out of order and is a breach of GDPR.

Jusmakingit · 05/02/2023 11:03

You need to report him. I wonder how many other women he’s done this to. You could really be helping other women out by reporting this creep who uses work to meet women, massive GDPR breach. He will get in trouble but I’m more than certain he had training and has to agree to comply with gdpr and customers . He knew what he was doing and knew the consequences.

I would not feel comfortable with him delivering my parcels . He has your details and knows where you live.

considerablycuntierthanyou · 05/02/2023 11:06

He probably doesn't mean any harm and was just trying to make contact because he likes you and didn't understand the level of creepiness it's on.

These sorts of answers are infuriating.

Of course he knows it's harmful and creepy, there is training employers drum into their delivery people from day 1 about GDPR breeches and ethics. Ffs.

Report this dickhead and get him off your route.

LittleRedTomato · 05/02/2023 11:07

@maddy68 , it is illegal to breach gdpr. He didn't find out the OP's name at a party, it's part of the data he accessed at work. She can put what she likes online but he isn't entitled to search out and message work clients, and he is breaching gdpr if he does.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 05/02/2023 11:09

Littlegoth · 05/02/2023 10:59

It’s a breach of GDPR and is a sackable offence. I work in HR.

Yes, this.

Pseudonamed · 05/02/2023 11:27

I had this with a driver from a takeaway. He sent me flowers then added me on social media. I just blocked him and that was it and never ordered from there again. It could have been a sackable offence though as he only had my details through the job and he used them for purposes outside that but as he never bothered me again I left it.

CrescentMoons · 05/02/2023 11:29

Screen shot and report to police and Dpd it is a breach of privacy stalking and a breach of gdpr

Jadviga · 05/02/2023 11:35

While it is a bit creepy, one message is not harmful. I'd tell him clearly you're not interested.

If he ever contacts you again, or is inappropriate in any way when delivering your parcels, then I'd report him to his employer and the police.