Would a Power of Attorney help secure inheritance?

[Shitsandwiches]

Hi

Just looking for some legal advice about Power of Attorney's regarding my Dad.

He's a vulnerable alcoholic aged 75 living on his own. I'm the only child (single parent in my forties with 2 DDs) and I'm not local to him. We don't really have any sort of relationship and I'm happier/feel safer with him at arms length. My mum died exactly a year ago.

He's in their home. It's probably worth around £200k - it would be a bit more but there's an equity release mortgage on it for £40k I think, it's not a drastically bad one with mega interest, but it's still there and I had recently made enquiries about changing that or starting to pay it off possibly. Hadn't actioned anything yet.

Anyway - my question is, I had looked into getting a Power of Attorney regarding his finances earlier this year because amongst other worrying behaviours (running out of money suddenly, taking out a loan etc) he took in a homeless woman off the street who turned out to be bipolar and manipulative and she started taking money off him. I downloaded the forms, told him about my worries, he agreed, signed his part of the form, I got it witnessed etc and then this homeless woman left and I thought well maybe I don't need it anymore and so never sent it off to be registered. Which I'm now kicking myself about...

This woman has subsequently been back in touch - he called me last night to say that things weren't great and she was scamming him. He had given her his credit card details - she's been in another location a few hours from him, scamming someone else I think, and got back in contact with him needing his help....she's had £1500 off it in 4 days.

Not only that, but he told me they're engaged. That he's given her a ring. I have no idea how or when this would have happened, and that he wants to marry her, and makes weird excuses for her behaviour. There is no reasoning with him.

I don't know what to do. Should I still send off the Power of Attorney forms? What good does that actually do? Should I speak to a solicitor - I don't want this woman in my life - I don't want to be in a situation where I'm fighting her for my Dad's estate, oh my goodness. I don't want to speak to him anymore really, it's just nonsense and it's too painful, should I just cut contact and cut my losses and let him get on with it and have no inheritance?

Thanks

Power of attorney will take weeks or months to register so wont help you in the short term So i would do it now for use in future. Im not sure how much it will help if your father still has capacity as it wont stop him making bad decisions. Perhaps you could persuade him to put some of his money into an account that cant be used easily with a bank card and take away any credit cards he has?

Registering the Power of Attorney won't mean you can use it if he has mental capacity and doesn't want you to take over his affairs.
Register it anyway because it is ready then if ever can be of use.

Thank you both - ok I think I'll do that then, just send it off then at least that's done and forget about it for now.

I just don't want anything to do with this woman. If/when something happens to him - I've been feeling today like I really just want to cut my losses and cut all contact - but that's probably not the best idea either.

It’s not your inheritance, it’s his belongings right now. You can have Power of Attorney but the threshold to trigger it is quite high, and even if you had an active Power of Attorney it wouldn’t stop his wife inheriting if they married previous to it being triggered or stop the house being sold for care fees etc. You may not like what he is doing but unless he is deemed to not have capacity there is nothing you can do about it.

Thanks Flapjack - I think I'm just in shock, when my mum was dying they were all over me with the wills and inheritance talk etc - I'm the only person named in the will at the moment obviously - he's always gone on about how me and my girls have nothing to worry about...

I was worried about him earlier this year and was advised to get a power of attorney but I hadn't even considered that or thought it necessary - and didn't go through with it.

I know there's nothing I can do now.....other than just accept it and for my own benefit of peace and security, cut contact with him. That's what I want to do because if she becomes his wife, I don't want her in my life at all.

She's still awol - last heard of having filled up her car in a petrol station with no means of paying

I did wonder what 2023 had in store after last year, seems like it can get worse!!

As others have said, power of a tourney only comes into action once the person doesn't have capacity. It could be worth submitting the form anyway. You need to get in touch with social services and inform them that your vulnerable elderly father is being blackmailed/manipulated by this woman who is stealing money from him. Not sure what they can do but they might have some advice. Contact her, in writing preferably (email, text etc) and tell her very clearly she is not to contact your father again, if she does you will contact the police. And if she does do it. Could be worth speaking to the police anyway, she may be known to them. Speak with credit company to get cards cancelled and inform of his vulnerability.

It’s been a while since I have had anything to do with POAs but I thought it had to be an enduring POA to stay in effect if someone is mentally incapacitated. A regular POA is used when someone has capacity and means you can act on their behalf. It does not mean you get to override their wishes.

Thanks Tango

She's effectively homeless, she's been staying with another vulnerable alcoholic. I have no means of contacting her.

My dad is not acting like a victim - he's snarky, defensive, feels deserving of having a new wife, is lonely, is determined to go ahead etc, it's not as straightforward as that.

I did contact social services earlier this year, as I was concerned about his mental health, heavily drunk at 11am when calling him, escorted home from the pub etc. I was told I would need his consent for a referral. I carefully broached the subject with him and received a flat no.

It's difficult because we don't have a relationship. We're not close in any way. It's been a lifetime of shit and he's very triggering for me. It's difficult.

Forget the inheritance aspect for now. You absolutely can do something about/report a safeguarding issue for an elderly, vulnerable adult being defrauded into giving their money away. Just because he has capacity doesn't mean he's not vulnerable to abuse. If he isn't able to make safe choices for himself he can be deemed to not have financial capacity without having to forfeit his health capacity. There are two types of power of attorney, Financial & one for Health and Welfare.

www.gov.uk/report-abuse-of-older-person

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/health-wellbeing/relationships-family/protection-from-abuse/

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/health-wellbeing/relationships-family/protection-from-abuse/financial-abuse/

I'm sorry social services were so dismissing. You don't need consent off your father to report a safeguarding issue so I would try that again. If no luck then you may have to take a step back and let him get on with it. I doubt they will actually marry.

Might be different in Scotland so worth checking but...
Welfare POA is only enacted once the individual has lost capacity
Finance (known as Continuing POA) can be immediate if arranged that way. No loss of capacity is required. Currently have this for my aunt who still has capacity but is elderly and very frail.

Thanks so much for the links Tango. I might look at reporting abuse and getting advice there, but other than that and if his consent is needed etc then leaving it well alone now.

and yep, inheritance forgotten too. A small price to pay if I get to keep my sanity.

@threekiltsandacardy - The POA can only be activated with the person’s permission if they have capacity, I doubt OP’s dad would agree from what she has said.

In order to get married, your dad would have to produce his birth certificate or passport; plus either a decree absolute or his wife's death certificate
I'd be tempted to make sure no such documentation can be found.

Married or not. there;s nothing to stop him making a new Will leaving all to the woman.

If she has defrauded him of money that's a police issue, and their attention might be a better way to get rid of her.

This. If he has capacity, he is free to make major decisions about his finances. The fact that you disagree with those decisions doesn't mean you can stop him. It's his money, not yours.

I'm quite shocked that you freely admit you barely have a relationship with him and your main interest is making sure you can get your hands on his money.

You cannot do this to another adult deemed to have capacity.

I agree that a safeguarding referral should be made, but beyond that, he is an adult and is free to make decisions about his life, whether they be good or bad ones. The suggestion to hide his documents so he is prevented from doing things is horrendous.

If he’s happy about things there’s not much you can do. The only safe thing would be to transfer everything into your name, so it’s your house and he gets to live there until he dies. But if he’s giving her his card details and getting married she’s likely to have everything off him in no time.😞

Thanks Honeyroar - yes I'm not going to stand in the way of his choice or happiness, real or imagined! I wouldn't dream of it. I don't need to be involved in it either.

I'm just really sad that this is what has become of what I knew of my family. A manipulator has come in and taken him for everything and he can't see it.

I will contact social services next week with my worries and take a step back

I haven't read the all post so I might have missed something .but I had POA for my mother .but I was under the impression that it ends when the person dies . Not sure if that's helpful or not .

@gloriawasright Yes, POA does end when the person dies. I completely agree that you should send it off to be registered, OP. It’ll take about three months but it’s worth having in place. Do you have both the Financial and the Health one? Given your Dad’s problems with alcohol, both would be helpful.

As others have said, it doesn’t allow you to make decisions while he has capacity, BUT this woman sounds as if she’d definitely take advantage if he was ever in hospital, for example, so you need them in place to protect him. Good luck, it’s a horrible position to be in. 💐

Send off the forms ,you need to also register with the banks and building societies .
But ( from memory as it was a while ago) if you have financial POW ,you have equal rights and access to everything financial .you get your own bank card linked to this bank accounts .to do with what you think is best .you could remove all his money and set up an allowance for him ,protecting his money for now ,but after death it would be the executor of his will who would then have the job .
I might be wrong and someone might be better informed and correct me .
Good luck op not an easy situation to be in .

Thank you Ham - it was just the financial bit I'd originally applied for (as I was concerned he was going to take out loans to give to her and thought I might be able to prevent that) - but yep worth doing the health as well I guess.

Yeah it's horrible - I think I'm reeling today!

Thanks Gloria