Solicitor Harassing me

[Joanna31]

Hi, I’ve posted before but maybe posted in wrong place . Can any one offer an advice?

child arrangements order in place which specifies in it the communication method is a parenting app. I’ve set this up and the other party won’t use it and I keep getting solicitors letters instead which are causing major distress. I have asked the solicitor to stop writing and to use the court ordered app but they won’t stop. Can they legally keep writing? I don’t have a solicitor so they write directly to me!

Surely the parenting app is for direct communication between you and the child's other parent for matters relating to the child.

What is the solicitor asking you by letter and why don't you just answer? They are writing to you because you don't have a solicitor instructed.

I don’t understand what difference does it make how the solicitors write to you? The app is for the parents to communicate so all communication can be monitored if required. It’s not for the solicitors. Just answer their queries

The app is meant for that and the court ordered it. This solicitor did not represent the other party either, it’s the nature of the letters which are distressing, they basically put in writing what should be in the app but the undertones to the letters are very upsetting, they don’t ask for any agreements to variations just basically dictate to me, I’m also concerned that the court have ordered something and the other party is not following the order

It’s not queries though, its letters of dictating “new arrangements” which haven’t been agreed

You do not have to do anything with the letters at all. You can bin them unopened if you want.

However try and flip it round to your advantage. Every letter you are sent costs him a few hundred quid. You could send a one line email to the solicitors saying 'Thank you for your letter of 7 December 2022. The arrangements remain as in the court order of 20 November 2022.'

Then his solicitor will have to write to him - another few hundred quid he'll be billed for. And they'll see him as a cash cow so they'll ask him what he'd like them to respond. And they'll send another - Kerching that's another few hundred quid he'll have wasted.

Just keep sending the exact same reply. Time and time again. Mentally keep a tally - £250 per letter plus £250 for them to check your response. See how quickly you can get him to run up a bill of £5000

🫣 Thankyou so much for your reply!, and maybe I think I’ve been overthinking it and literally just need to write a very brief response, and you’re right it must be costing him so much money, especially for someone who says they can’t afford any maintenance, not one penny! 🧐. The letters cause so much anxiety I dread opening them, I think aswell because of the dictating nature I maybe get a bit defensive!

Just reply to each one with ‘please use the app as the court directed’ without addressing any of the content.

That’ll soon rack up a heck of a bill and get the message across.

I did exactly the same as @titchy has suggested with my ExH (different circumstances). He was paying fortunes to a solicitor to get 'I have no idea what you're talking about' type responses from me. Cost him a bloody fortune and got him nowhere. It amused me no end!

A solicitor will not be using the app that is meant for communication between the parents though.

No, the solicitor won't. But it seems OP's ex is using his solicitor for communications that should go through the app. He can and should use the app.

This is exactly what is happening!