Varying Financial Remedy Order

[swingersnotroundabouts]

Has anyone had a financial remedy order made as part of a divorce settlement and then successfully had it varied? Mesher order applied to property with equity split of 70/30 when property sold at youngest's 18th.
I just can't see how I will afford to house 5 of us (me and 4 kids all who still will be in education). I work part time currently as he cannot do school runs and they can't get to/from school. Barely survive as it is. He pays minimum CMS as is employed through own company Even if I sell, with equity I will not be able to top up with a mortgage. Current house (4bed) worth £400, mortgage is interest only, £150k equity. Because I had cancer the judge ruled variable maintenance of £1 a year to increase if circumstances dictated I needed help. He hasn't paid me that so technically is in breach of order anyway.
So, has anyone applied to vary, what was the process and was it successful?

The fact you were awarded nominal maintenance means you may be able to claim for increased spousal maintenance. However, if you want to challenge the asset split, that is highly unlikely to succeed. You would need to show that your ex did not make a full financial disclosure prior to the order. Alternatively, if the order was made recently, you may be able to get it varied if there has been a Barder event - that is something unexpected that happens within a few months of the order that undermines the basis on which the order was made.

I don't want to vary the split, but the time to sell. I'll still have all children living with me at the time the youngest turns 18 and will not be able to afford to house us all.

A Mesher Order where you get 70% of the equity on sale is far more detrimental to his interests than yours. You are essentially squatting on his mortgage capacity and most likely forcing him to burn money in rent for several years at the end of which he will only receive 30% of the equity and to make matters worse for him you are only paying the mortgage on an interest only basis. In other words, you have already done extremely well and seem extremely selfish to want this unfortunate situation to continue any longer than it already will. The longer this order goes on for, the greater the chance he will never be able to own his own property. Believe me, as someone who was nearly put in the same situation as him, you will be pushing your luck to demand any more because when you have one of these things hanging over you as an NRP the motivation to work is already dangerously low.

Legally, you also don't have a leg to stand on. The court order has been made and no court is going to re-open it to his detriment in order for you to house your adult children. They'll be expected to either:

1. Go to university, and only need to stay with you during holidays; or
2. Get a job and help contribute towards owning a bigger house.

The only way you could extend the term is with his consent. If it was me, I would only agree if in return I was going to receive 50% of the equity and if the mortgage was on a repayment basis paid solely by the occupant.

@BetterFuture1985 He's currently sitting in a house worth £1million. He is in no way poor. He also doesn't want the children to ever live with him full time, one of them doesn't have a bedroom there but is "welcome to use the guest bedroom" (that never gets used) so it will be down to me to house us all again.

I'm not sure why my last post was deleted, but I shall write in bullet point form to avoid the wrath of the moderators (or at least make it easier to highlight what they have a problem with):

1. You have a court order that cannot be changed by consent. A Mesher Order is an order of the court, not a contract. So if you want it changed, it has to be changed by a court.

2. You have not suggested any incentive to your husband to agree to an extension of the Mesher Order. If you want to agree a change, you're presumably going to have to find one to ensure he agrees. Otherwise, you have no chance whatsoever of changing the order unless he has previously lied to to the court to a material extent in which case you would have a rarest of rare case that could be reopened.

3. His wealth now is entirely irrelevant to this court order. A lot of weaker financial parties use the "but s/he has XYZ assets or ABC income" but this is completely irrelevant. Exes are allowed to become more successful or to find a new partner who is successful without having to have bottomless pockets for their ex-spouse. This works both ways; it's not unheard of for the weaker financial party to go on to earn more than their ex in the future and they're not normally suddenly expected to terminate the Mesher Order early or start paying maintenance.

4. The likelihood is you'll have a grace period to sell the house after your youngest turns 18. Use this time wisely;

5. By the time your youngest is 11, you should be working full time and doing everything you can to maximise your own earning capacity. That is your best way to improve your housing situation. Your best option is probably not to waste money on solicitors trying to change this order.

So the legal answer is that there is nothing you can do to change this order unless he's either been materially dishonest in the past or consents to it. I'm sorry if MumsNet finds that so beyond the pale that such comment has to be banned but I've spoken to enough solicitors in the past about these horrid Mesher Orders that wreak financial destruction first on the NRP, then the RP and then finally the children when they come to inherit.

It may be of interest that one thing that really put my ex-wife off a Mesher Order was that if she took it to court, her earning capacity would have been scrutinised and the likely outcome would have been that yes she would have gotten the order but on the assumption that she would maximise her earning capacity and could afford the mortgage on her own. I might have been expected to help pay about half the mortgage in year one, stepping down in years two and three (via spousal maintenance, losing her universal credit....) before she had to pay the whole thing in year four. She didn't want to maximise her earning capacity, so she chose to take all the equity and buy something cheaper that she could afford for the forseeable future on a part time salary, child maintenance and universal credit.

When your youngest is 18 you will not need to house 5 children. They will all be adults. To be honest you stand next to no chance.

It's not next to no chance. It is simply no chance. The court order already exists. There is no incentive for the other party to change it.

OP needs to get a full time job and build her mortgage capacity.

The next to no chance referred to the nominal maintenance order. Delaying the sale of the house is fantasy time.

Oh sorry, yes. The nominal maintenance, definitely next to no chance too. Especially as it is sorely in OP's own interests to work FT as soon as possible.

Even if I go full time, and I'm only 6 hours shy of it at the moment I have a mortgage capacity of £90k. With the equity I will have £180k total. That doesn't get a 1 bed where I am. And no, I can't move away.
If he won't house the kids, and I can't house them, and they can't afford their own places then I'll wait until he enforces the court order and date my case to the judge. The last judge I had hauled him over the coals for trying to enforce an immediate sale and said the court will always look for the most economical way to house the family. He even said that kids do not leave home at 18 and ex was naive to think that.

I think people on here have been realistic with you and you need to get your head around a change in your living arrangements.

My best friend has a mesher. Her ex comes from money and has a wealthy partner. She was given 18 months from when her twins turned 18 and then the court turned the screws and told her to sell. And tbh I felt for her ex as he had been patient and only remained so as she lost her dad and got a big inheritance (which she used to buy him out)

I wish she had sold. The place is falling down around her ears and she is interest only. She is now debating her next move but the fact she hasn't been able to maintain her (would be super expensive) pile means it's losing value.

I on the other hand downsized to a two bed from a four bed and sleep on the sofa when my son is home from uni (with cancer) it's not ideal but I cut my cloth accordingly. As you should.

The judge said it was naive to think children leave home at 18, and then ordered a Mesher that ends when your youngest is 18? Are you sure you weren't just hearing what you want to hear?

The courts have obviously made a series of decisions for good reason. The Mesher presumably ends when youngest is 18 because by that time your other children will be older than that, adults and able to either move out or contribute. Your eldest for example is presumably more than 3 years older than your youngest and will have graduated/been working for a while by the time youngest reaches 18.

The nominal maintenance probably exists just in case you get cancer again. I very much hope you won't. I doubt you'll get it increased for anything less.

Hi,
Currently 2 weeks into 20week cooling off (divorce) and i'm concerned for housing/finances.
I am home-maker, also work part time (zero hrs/casual) i do pay towards home/kids, around Husbands perm 4 on 4 off, he's breadwinner (he works away/sleeps out regularly). We own a martial home (mortgaged, with approx £120,000-£130,000 equity), this inc a GIFT from Mother in Law of 50k when we purchased prop 2 yrs ago (nor on deeds or mort, as its a GIFT). I intended to give her my part back, don't have to and don't know if i can even afford to.
Also jointly own BTL (first family home), currently on market for sale, mort £67k, est sale price £118k.
We have joint debts of around 30k and he also has motorbike worth 6.5k which i know is asset.
My question/worry is, we have 2 kids 3 and 9 yrs, all live at family home.
At moment i can't get agreement in principal, so alls i will 'leave' with is equity/asset pot and no chance of mortgaging another prop.
I won't qualify for benefit help because my cash pot will be high and i'd be forced to spend cash pot on soley renting prop (with kids).
Whats the likelihood i can request a mesher order on family home?
I'm so worried that because he earns full time and will leave with his equity, he will be in a better position financially to offer kids better life and he'd get custody?
He IS in a position to buy me out of the BTL, however debts need to be paid first and we would need to agree to sell marial/family home in order for this to happen. He has suggested buying me out of BTL and knows marital home would need to first - putting me and kids potentially homeless (he suggested me and kids living in BTL - 2 bed only so not suitable with boy 3 and girl 9) says he doesn't want to see us out of a home.
Lender for marital home says he can afford to pay for marital home, but can't afford to buy me out of it...so..where do i go from here? Thank you x

You need to see a solicitor. They will be best placed to advise when they are in possession of all the facts.

I can't afford one 😭

Not enough information to advise but Mesher Orders are extremely rare unless agreed by both parties these days (i.e. if I was advising him I would be telling him to say no and take it to court, if I was advising you I'd say try and negotiate). A situation where you stay in the home and use his capital with a charge back might be possible but you'll need to get him off the mortgage in a reasonable time frame, much sooner than youngest turning 18.

Can you advise on share to negotiate (ie how court would calculate % split). I work part time, 20hrs £11 an hr, child carer/homemaker for 11 yrs (married 3 yrs), he is breadwinner, 30k per yr.
4 on 4 off (i've always worked zero hours between his work to suit family/finances)
Thank you

Anyone who attempts to answer your question would be guessing. You say you can't afford legal advice. I would strongly recommend that you find a way to afford it. You don't necessarily need a solicitor to act for you throughout, but you do need some advice on what kind of split you should expect and what options you have.

I have a legal charge/Mesher order applied to a property and my daughter has just turned 18th.

I have the money to give my ex husband and I have spoke to the Citizens advice regarding the land registry and taking his name off the deeds once it is paid.

My ex and I would like to not involve solicitors really and just do a transfer together at the bank, where he will sign a DS1 and I will then send that for plus a DS2 to the land registry.

Has anyone else not involved solicitors? The charge is for £38.000 and I have no extra money what so ever for the £600+ for their fees. So unsure what to do and hoping someone has been in a similar situation to this.

wrote in wrong place

Not involving solicitors is a very stupid thing to do. Your house is presumably worth over £100K, likely more. The £600 you'd pay is to make sure this is done properly and protected from your ex. Find the £600 to protect the £100K's worth of asset.

So the way I see it you should find a way to pay him his 30% equity, £40 now so that doesn't increase. Then you could stay in the home.

@swingersnotroundabouts any news at all?