Selling House with LPA

[Colderthanawitchestit]

MIL is very ill with a variety of things, including dementia, and is currently in hospital. She is likely to be coming out over the next week but the stay has restricted her mobility even more than previously. Realistically it’s time she is moved to a care home so that she can get the care she needs. DH has been limping on for several years with paid carers but they are very hard to find and retain. He has health and finance LPA, without which he would have been completely hamstrung in dealing with her medical affairs and paying for care, food etc. He has kept meticulous records of any spending as there are family members who don’t involve themselves in helping, but see any spending as whittling away their inheritance 🙄

MIL would be self funding in a care situation and there is enough for around a year’s fees, after which her house will need to fund it. I know that once the cash is gone the LA will finance the care and place some kind of order on the house. It’s unlikely she will live longer than a year, but possible. I was wondering if it’s feasible/wise for DH to sell beforehand and ring fence the money in an account in her name that he is able to pay for her care and other needs from? Is this possible and what are the potential pitfalls? I’d like things to be as simple as possible so that once she passes there is less wrangling and nastiness, which is easier if we are talking about any residual money rather than having the complications of the LA possibly having an interest in the house. In-laws won’t understand that and why it may affect ‘their share’. Families eh?

I don’t know but kind of in a similar situation re LPA, aggressive siblings and a pending house sale.

We decided to move soon as she is stable to get the house on the market because grief plus aggro would probably tip me over the edge.

That’s exactly it! DH is on his last available nerve as it is. Once she passes it’s going to be so much harder to get anything done with others all grasping for their money asap. At least if it’s cash then probate should hopefully be simpler and they can just wait, without trampling all over the place fighting over every single crappy nick-nack while DH is grieving and trying to sell.

Absolutely sell it first

We also added my husband into the LPA (my mum adores him) so that he can do it or in too hairy or stressed.

My mum is so sick that we haven’t even been able to go and clear the house yet (other end of country but she lives with us ) so I have to just hope we can somehow get it sorted before the vultures come circling

I think while you/she can. Just simplify down everything financially

My mum is really astute and has left everything in two accounts, liquidated a few funds and it’s all quite streamlined

Taking the emotion out of it, it is a good idea to sell now, we had MIL Come to live with us and sold the home and had a good sort out of her things. She then went into a home and the money was easy to sort out and fund her. Sadly she passed quite quickly but it now means the will, probate etc are much easier to deal with during a difficult time.

Thanks so much for the replies. You’ve all confirmed what I thought. It’s going to be a tricky path to navigate with DH’s family but I don’t care about that, my main concern is his well-being as it’s been tough on him. I don’t think she’ll live very much longer, but if she passes while the sale is progressing then at least it’s already going through and will save time. Most of the clutter has gone as we’ve had to make it as safe as possible but there is still stuff for them to fight over. 🙄

I would rent the house out until she runs out of money to contribute towards care costs ..

I am in the same position and would do exactly that if and when needs must

I think it would be a really bad idea to get involved in renting. MN is full of tenants who can’t/won’t move out of rented property, leaving the landlords with the hassle of eviction etc. There is also the looming threat of essential upgrades to rented property, I suspect a property lived in by an elderly person would fail all these test.

@Allthegoodnamesarechosen I have a rented property and it's fine ..
we use an agency and the money goes into mums pot every month ..

I agree it's a risk but my mums care is £6500 a month so it's worth the risk to us

I would rent her actual house too in this scenario .. as it is my mum will live in it with her live in Carer until she needs a home

I'm in exactly this scenario @Colderthanawitchestit and we sold DPs house after DM died and DF went into a care home. It's made things so much simpler and not only means I can buy clothes etc directly from DFs own money, but also meant that the emotional turmoil of the house sale and clearance is behind us, which I suspect will pay dividends when DF dies and the vultures descend... 🙄

I doubt she will live long enough for the money in her account, which is a significant amount, to be swallowed up by care costs but there is always a possibility. She has a range of medical issues other than the dementia including an organ that’s failing. Don’t want to be more specific about that and I’ve NC’d just in case. We did think about renting but if she dies quickly then the other family members will push for the house to be sold asap, which would be tricky with tenants. I am really just looking at ways of simplifying things for DH as he’s been left to deal with all this alone for several years, and protracted rows once he is grieving isn’t the way to go. He has some control now and can liquidate her assets so that probate is easier, as @SeasonalVag said. Luckily the house needed to be decluttered so that carers can work safely, and trip hazards eliminated, so most of the unnecessary stuff has been redistributed already.

In that case then just sell it and put the money into a separate account and use the funds from that to make it simple . My mums estate is around a million right now but she is only late 70's and has dementia so we have a good few years of care ahead of us .

It's tricky isn't it especially when vultures are circling .. luckily it's only me and my sister at the mo and we get along and make joint decisions .