Taking my child abroad

[GoingItAloneAgain]

Hi

I am wanting to take my son on holiday to Italy next year. However it has just occured to me that he does not have the same surname as me (he has his dad's surname). Will this cause issues at passport control?

He doesn't have any contact with his dad but i am concerned that if I plan to book this then I need to obtain written consent from his dad, who does have parental responsibility.

Can anyone please advise?

Unless you have a Child Arrangements Order saying your son lives with you, you need written consent from your child's father or, failing that, a Specific Issue Order allowing the holiday. If you have that you should not have any problems at passport control.

My non-legal answer (acknowledging this is in Legal Matters) is that in my experience you will only be asked to prove your own relationship to your son - and likely this will only happen on the way back into the UK. I do always carry a consent letter from my husband but have only ever been asked for my son's birth certificate.

I get stopped every year, but only on RETURN into the UK. I have to show her birth certificate and mine, and they usually ask my daughter "who's this?" . Of course she replies "my mum" and then were allowed entry back into our own country. Never been stopped outbound. You're supposed to carry a letter of consent and a phone number for them, but I'm NC with him, DD hasn't seen him in 10 years and I've never been asked for one. Perhaps I've been lucky.

Just take his birth certificate with you.

Thanks so much for the advice. I will go ahead and book our holiday.

I have been stopped once, coming into the UK (I am still with DH but was travelling without him on that occasion. DS has his suname not mine). The border control man let us through but advised me to always travel with a copy of his birth certificate, which I now do.

I only got checked when I returned, they literally asked her who I was, and she said my mum and that was it. I did have a letter ready and birth certificate, but they never asked. I would just carry the birth certificate in your case.

The law states you need permission but doesn’t seem anyone is ever actually stopped.

You posted this on Legal Matters, so I will set out the legal position clearly.

Unless you have a CAO stating that your son lives with you, you will be committing a criminal offence if you take your son out of the country without either the father's consent or an appropriate court order. It is highly unlikely you will be prosecuted for this. Thousands of people break this law every year without problems. However, every year some people are refused boarding at the airport or refused entry at the destination because they don't have a court order or evidence of the other parent's consent. If you choose to go without the father's consent or a court order, the odds are that you won't have a problem, but you need to be aware that there is a chance you will lose the holiday.

Previous threads have occasionally attracted comments from people who have been stopped and have lost holidays as a result. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

Not helpful to you but when my niece was 7 I took her and my 2 DDs to visit my mum overseas.
Upon returning to the U.K. we'd practiced what she should say at passport control but when asked who I was she replied 'I have no idea '!
The children all thought this would be hilarious.
Needless to say I wasn't a happy auntie or mummy ten minutes later after convincing them that she was related to me!

The thing is with a cao is that the absent parent needs to be contacted so this could prompt contact and a lot of us don’t want to risk that I would rather risk the holiday tbh, so I would personally take the risk, I don’t know anyone that has ever been stopped, my friend took her nephew on holiday (so no parents) and was never questioned, that applies to everyone I know.

I've got the same name as my children but as a singe parent, I've still been stopped a few times. I've shown the court order once on the way out of the country, but otherwise it's just passport control asking the children who I am and what our names are etc.

Its a bit of a gamble isnt it? I think if i tried to make contact i would probably be ignored. Then what do I do? I am guessing that i would have to seek advice from a solicitor and possibly go to family court?

Just bring his birth certificate with you.

You shouldn't need a solicitor for an SIO for a holiday. You should have no problem getting an order for a holiday.

My daughter has her fathers surname on her passport and he is on her birth certificate and has Parental Rights.
His name and contact details are also on the back of her passport along with mine but we have never had any issues but I have always carried a letter of consent signed and dated by him and I also carry a copy of her birth certificate.

Not if you have a lives with CAO

Sorry do you mean they aren’t contacted? I wanted to get a cao but was told my ex would have to be contacted and they would give him a chance to attend court

Nobody is stopped leaving the UK because there is no border control on exit, only on entry.
You also need to check the requirements for the country you're entering. Some require certified/notarised documentation either of consent/inability to obtain consent. Italy isn't one of them, but they do have border control on entry and exit who may carry out checks.
I'm not a lawyer unlike pp on the thread, but this area is my day job (and night ) so please don't listen to anyone telling you you won't be stopped.
Mothers automatically have PR, fathers don't, but unless, as @prh47bridge says, there is documentation in place confirming absence of PR, which it doesn't seem like there is, then consent is needed.
www.gov.uk/permission-take-child-abroad

I have never been stopped and I have a different surname to my kids, I travel with them a few times a year.

It's really less to do with surnames and more to do with a lone adult travelling with a child. As I said on another thread, a sample of lone adults with children will have their consent forms checked. More likely if it's a lone father travelling with a child/children.