Solicitors Advice (Financial Order) which may NOT have been corrrect?

[RainingBows]

Hello all,
Ive recently posted about an ongoing complaint ive submitted to my (past) solicitor due to the fact I feel they continued to charge me after I believe I made it clear I could no longer afford their representation.

Having gained the chance to speak to a couple of law firms in this time, I am receiving responces of 'shock' at the Financial Consent Order ive signed to following my solicitors guidance.

If anyone could help gauge if this is the case, itd be appreciated, as this would be added to my complaint.

Brief summary of the case:
My xHusband had an affair and left me, our baby and toddler, and the family home, which we had moved into only 6 weeks prior.
I have paid every penny towards the home, bills etc.
He also owes me over £1k in Child Maintenance (not through CMS so indeed this money is lost)
Ive not asked him for a penny extra.
He has had no contact with us for over 2 years.

Brief summary of Finances involved:
He was the Applicant in the case - wanting to force a sale of the family home.
He earns 3x my wage.
He is living with the other woman, whom earns the same wage as him.
So they are financially good. (And living a lovely little life)
From my marriage the children and I have gone from a disposable income of £2k per month to £600.
We put £35k down as a deposit for the home. (My parents gave us £26k in renovation work on our last property which I feel is relevant, they also paid off my xHusbands personal debt)

I had asked my solicitor for a Mesher Order.
Not because I wanted to demand the children and I live in the home until they were 18, but certainly until they were settled in PRIMARY school, which I think was a fair ask considering the childrens stability at a vunerable time of transition.
*My solicitor stated that courts no longer approve Mesher Orders, they are old requests.

I was advised to ask about Spousal Maintenance, not that I wanted to gain money from my xHusbands pocket, but I asked and;
*My solicitor stated my husband didnt earn enough (£38k)

I was told that my xHusband should have been paying half the mortgage payments and bills. (Its a Joint mortgage)
*My solicitor stated no one could force him to.

I have been informed that there shouldnt be such a drastic drop in our standard of living.
*My solicitor stated this wasnt relevant and courts dont look at that.
That as long as I can gain a 'roof over the children and Is heads' thats all the court looks at.
Eg If we go from a 6 bedroom property to a 3 bed terrace, its just a sad fact.

The Consent Order I have signed to:
My xHusband made the offer out of court, to give me the equity from the house (£35k) minus sale costs etc.
But I have to have the house SOLD within 4 months after our youngest child starts Primary school (this year).

In this short time I have to apply to increase my work to full time in order to get the best mortgage offer I can for the children and I and move us.
Note I may get refused if my company dont have a full time space at that exact time.
So Im stressed at the worry that I dont really know what sort of property we are likely to achieve and of course the actual process of moving house with two infant children on my own.

I was also worried about that pressure to move by a very exact date. I tried to put in provisions for what ifs, but he refused all.
I was being forced to sign the Order a week before Christmas or it was going to court, the stress of which did influence my decision to just sign it as I was scrambling to gain free legal advice.

The whole situation screams not fair.
Everyone I spoke to stated your the mother of two infant children, this man has just left, he is financially stable, your struggling, a court will not see you loose so much.
My gain is less than £35k, but a dramatic drop in lifestyle.

Hes is sorted. He has a nice car. Holidays. Nice clothes. And as soon as his name is off our mortgage he will go on to buy a large property with the other woman im sure.

My solicitor made me feel stupid and that the legal system was not justifiable.
I dont know what to believe?

I think some of its right, although people more knowledgeable will give better advice-
At 38k I doubt you'll get spousal maintenance.
What his partner earns won't be taken into account and it is a sad fact that if you can't afford a 6 bed house a move to a 3 bed may have to happen. He absolutely wouldn't have to pay towards a 6 bed, why would you need this with only 3 of you?

@MichelleScarn - The 6 bed reference was an example of how someones standard of living could reduce by means of what my solicitor was saying.
We dont live in a 6 bedroom house ;)

On the face of it I'd say your lawyer was mostly right. Moving to a 3 bed would be considered adequate housing for you and your children. Does he have any assets? Or was it all just the equity which you get? That could change things. On the information you presented is say mostly reasonable. The date to sell house by I would feel is unreasonable, as that could force your hand to take any offer, though I'd expect he'd have to go to court to enforce that term, which would give you more time in which to sell. Hopefully one of the actual lawyers who answer posts here will be along soon to give you an informed opinion on this.

When you say you’ve spoken to a couple of law firms, what do you mean? Have you gone to other family firms and asked about varying order or professional negligence? Have you formally instructed them/have they offered to take on your case.

I’m surprised several firms have been “shocked” at the agreement you reached. No one on the internet can say if you were given appropriate advice, but I have to say on what you are saying I’m not “shocked”.

Has the court approved the order? Courts don’t just rubber stamp financial orders they will have to consider it is fair as well.

My worry is you’ve got limited assets and what I would hate to happen is people on the internet telling you, “oh that’s outrageous” for you to spend lots of money to find out it wasn’t.

My solicitor stated that courts no longer approve Mesher Orders, they are old requests

I wouldn't go as far as that, but they are seen as an imperfect solution so will only be used when there is no other option.

My solicitor stated my husband didnt earn enough (£38k)

Agree. The courts prefer a clean break.

My solicitor stated no one could force him to.

Agree.

My solicitor stated this wasnt relevant and courts dont look at that.

The standard of living before the breakdown of the marriage is one of the considerations, but the primary consideration is making sure everyone, particularly children, has a roof over their heads. In many divorces, there is no money for anything more than that.

I wouldn't want to judge the consent order without a lot more information. However, given his earnings, I suspect the house was the only significant asset and your post suggests you are getting 100% of the equity in the house. You should also get maintenance for the children. Why does the house have to be sold? Is it that you can't afford the mortgage?

What have these solicitors advised you should have got?

Mesher orders are quite rare now. If you search for threads on MN there's several where a MO has been granted but actually worked against the person who it was granted to. Clean breaks are preferred. And usually when you get a mesher order, you have to pay the mortgage and upkeep. Normally the eventual equity would be split between both of you. Do you may have 35k equity now. But in 18 years that could be,say, 135k, but that doesn't always go to one person.

I would quite happily bet a year's wages that someone earning 38k per year, would not have to pay spousal support.

The standard of living doesn't have to remind the same. In the vast majority of divorces that's near in impossible. There's simply not enough money in the pot. Like in this situation.

But it would be interesting to know what they believe they could have got you.v

What do you think the solicitor said is not true and what do you think you should have got as settlement?
Tbh nothing in your post leaps out particularly as Unfair and /incorrect
Is the consent order sealed?

Does the order contain a date for the sale to be completed? If this was agreed last year, how long do you have left, is the house on the market?

My solicitor stated that courts no longer approve Mesher Orders, they are old requests.

I doubt that she stated this. As explained, mesher orders are rarely appropriate and as such are not favoured by courts.

You're understandably very stressed at the moment. Would it help to make a list of what you need to focus on? Work, house sale, mortgage or rental etc.

you have signed the consent order, that is correct what ive understood?

@prh47bridge The applicant, wanted the family home sold 'asap' simply so he can get a mortgage with the other woman.
(It was a double affair - so she left her house and hes left his house, so they have had to rent a property.)

I pay for every penny toward the family home, so other than him wanting his 'NAME' off the mortgage, he has nothing to do with the family home.

As for what do I feel I should have got:
I just wanted more time - for the childrens sakes.
My youngest son will be moving from nursery to Primary school September/October and then I will have to 'try' increase to full time (which may be refused) and then sell the childrens home in the space of 12 weeks for the best achievable mortgage on my sole wage.
I cant even figure out if I am financially better off working full time Vs after school clubs etc and holiday clubs etc.
I dont want to move the children into rented accommodation then move us again.

This is what frustrates me, because this man isnt living with his parents or in a flat, hes in a nice house! His housing needs are met and hes financially well off, he could just wait. Even 6 more months would have helped me make this transition.
But it was this or we go to court...I signed it out of fear of loosing the equity and 'hope' that I can make this work.

Im 'hoping' a mortgage company can utilise the fact that Ive provably paid for the property by myself for 3 years :/ to have it moved into my sole name.

@LizDoingTheCanCan I have to have his name off the mortgage 'by' Jan 2023.

And indeed my solicitor told me that courts dont approve Mesher Orders anymore :/
(Along with 'No one contests divorces' - although that I can believe due to how much it would have cost me)

Just to add, the financial order by the applicant had been delayed due to Covid etc, it was actually submitted when I had x2 children still in nursery.
He wanted us out of the home at any cost, so he can buy a new house.

If this had been decided by the courts, you may still have been required to make best efforts to get him off the mortgage.

Your post seems confused as to whether the order requires you to sell the house or just get his name off the mortgage. Those are different things. As he doesn't appear to be getting any equity from the house, I would have expected the order to simply require you to get him off the mortgage rather than stipulating that the house must be sold. I would also expect it to have required you to make best efforts to get him off the mortgage rather than insisting that he must be removed at all costs. After all, if you can't find a lender who will give you a big enough mortgage and the house can't be sold by the deadline, you won't be able to get him off the mortgage.

I presume the order is to get husbands name off the mortgage by Jan 2023. If not done by this date then the property is sold. Op keeps 100 per cent of equity minus sale costs. Fairly standard.

If you just have the mortgage bit then often what happens is the other party is not removed. They they have to come back to court and make an application to sell the property.

I agree it will be termed best efforts to remove from mortgage (court can’t mandate this as it might not be possible given ops income), but as I say sale in default of this is normal.

Yes thats correct, its to get his name off the mortgage by whatever means by Jan 2023 or a forced sale.

What I understand is a court is to (quite rightly) take into account the childrens ages/best interests.
Moving two infant children just after the youngest starts school has been my argument that I feel is unfair.

(But like I say I was told Mesher orders didnt exist anymore. It was all about giving the man that doesnt pay anything his freedom...)

Mesher orders are only used if there is no other option. I doubt you would have got one.

The court may well have taken the view that, if a move was necessary, it could happen at any time. You didn't have to wait until the youngest started primary school. The court may also have taken the view that moving just after starting primary school is not a huge issue and your ex needs to be off the mortgage so that he can buy a new property, and so that all financial ties between you and him are severed.

You say he doesn't pay anything. If he doesn't pay child maintenance, why haven't you made a claim through the CMS?

@RainingBows

Yes thats correct, its to get his name off the mortgage by whatever means by Jan 2023 or a forced sale.

What I understand is a court is to (quite rightly) take into account the childrens ages/best interests.
Moving two infant children just after the youngest starts school has been my argument that I feel is unfair.

(But like I say I was told Mesher orders didnt exist anymore. It was all about giving the man that doesnt pay anything his freedom...)

You don't have to move them You could buy him out yourself? Have you tried to get the mortgage in your own name? Given you're paying it all at the moment your lender may well agree.

@prh47bridge@prh47 I said I pay every penny towards the home. I did make a claim through CMS, that isnt the issue im posting about.

And if a court can state that this is fair and reasonable its a DISGRACE.

Basically a man can just break his marriage vows, walk away from all his financial responsibilities and his commitment to his wife/children and a court says its ok mate, heres a clean break....you go live your shiny new life.
DISGRACE.
Children need stability and security, or whats the point of a court even pretending its about what is best for the children.

I tried the mortgage lender last year and they said they couldnt transfer the mortgage in my sole name as on paper I dont earn enough (based on a F/T wage)

You described him as "the man that doesn't pay anything", hence my comment.

But you have walked away with all the equity, and have been given over a year to increase your hours to give you a salary acceptable to the lender (if you're currently managing to pay it you're probably not far off).

You could also try a different lender, or use a broker who can advise you which lenders give the biggest multiple, and which will include CMS. You don't have to sell the house at all.

Your ex doesn't have any financial responsibility to you. You're a grown adult who works and he isn't a high earner. He has a financial responsibility to his children which you say you are pursuing via CMS.

If you don't want to increase your hours or use a mortgage broker then moving house isn't a particularly traumatic thing for children, so I don't know why you think this course of action is removing stability and security.

Because their damn father walked out on them! They have seen their mother have a breakdown.
He left me when I was on maternity leave!

I get it, you guys think this is perfectly acceptable behaviour.
Thats the post sorted then.
My life, my problem.

It's appalling behaviour from him. But divorce settlements are not based on behaviour at all. He could have beat you to a pulp every day, pimped you out, stole from you. And still the settlement would have been the same. Because it's not related.

No-one is saying his behaviour was acceptable, but the financial settlement isn't about punishing him.