Page 2 | My partner wants me out.

DaniiSmith · 2021-09-28T20:04:11+00:00

I really need some advice. I have been with my partner for 6 years, we have a one & two year old. Things were ok until he recently told me he no longer loves me and wants to separate. He's giving me a couple of weeks to leave and I just don't know what to do. He's the main provider, I gave up my job when we had our children to look after them full time, I have no savings put aside for this scenario... I genuinely don't know what to do. I don't know how to function without him. I adore my children and just want this to be as easy on them as possible. I need to get my shit together and stay strong for them... I just don't know where to start .

MissyB1 · 29/09/2021 08:09

Sorry to stress this point again but under no circumstances should you leave the kids with him - it will be extremely difficult to ever get them back.

Call Shelter or other housing crisis charities, they will give good advice. And ring CMS to get the claim in today.

femfemlicious · 29/09/2021 08:19

Why have 2 babies with a man you are not married to...awful situation. Hope you are able to sort it out

Yoit best bet tell hom to gove you 2 months, put in a claim for benefits and cms in the meantime. Probably you will have to move on with family at first to save up for a flat. Then get yourself together to get back to work. It will be hard but you can do it.

Collaborate · 29/09/2021 10:02

As suggested, see a solicitor. You need his assurance he won't try to get you to leave - if that's not forthcoming you need to consider applying for an occupation order. Also you need to consider an order under the Children Act and/or TOLATA for the property to be placed in to trust for you to enable you to live there until the children leave school.

I'm not saying that you will definitely get such an order but that's what you need advice on.

Hoppinggreen · 29/09/2021 10:07

Jesus Christ, not another one.
I am sorry you found yourself in this situation OP and this man is being a prize shit but this sort of thing should be shown to young girls at school to illustrate why you should never have babies and give up your job without getting married first
Marriage is a legal contract that gives people rights and responsibilities, it’s not a big party.
See a Solicitor OP and hopefully they will be able to help you

HeartsAndClubs · 29/09/2021 10:12

Legally no, you don’t have a leg to stand on.

He is only responsible for his children, you’re not married and as he owns the house He can change the locks tonight if he wants to and you will be powerless to do anything about it.

To the posters saying to the OP he can’t throw her out/she may have the right to stay in the house until the children are adults, yes, he can, and no, she has no rights.

This is why women are so often advised not to have children with men they’re not married to, because if the relationship ends they end up up shit creak without a paddle.

You need to speak to the CMS and to the housing organisations, also start your UC claim right now. But I wouldn’t bother with a solicitor as it will be a waste of money. And again, contrary to what some seem to think on here, most solicitors really don’t give a half hour free consultation. Some do, but they’re not as common as seems to be thought on here.

Collaborate · 29/09/2021 10:34

@HeartsAndClubs

Legally no, you don’t have a leg to stand on.

He is only responsible for his children, you’re not married and as he owns the house He can change the locks tonight if he wants to and you will be powerless to do anything about it.

To the posters saying to the OP he can’t throw her out/she may have the right to stay in the house until the children are adults, yes, he can, and no, she has no rights.

This is why women are so often advised not to have children with men they’re not married to, because if the relationship ends they end up up shit creak without a paddle.

You need to speak to the CMS and to the housing organisations, also start your UC claim right now. But I wouldn’t bother with a solicitor as it will be a waste of money. And again, contrary to what some seem to think on here, most solicitors really don’t give a half hour free consultation. Some do, but they’re not as common as seems to be thought on here.

I am literally a family law solicitor. Been doing it for 30 years. OP is not powerless, unless your research on google and Facebook trumps my professional qualifications and experience.

Northernsoullover · 29/09/2021 10:38

I would listen to Collaborate

Lockdownbear · 29/09/2021 10:41

@Northernsoullover

I would listen to Collaborate

Me too, I don't think it's as easy as he thinks to throw you out. Good luck Op, sorry your ex is such an arse!

Kuachui · 29/09/2021 11:02

Really? He's making his babies homeless. Disgusting. Took me a year to get a housing association flat....some people wait years

LemonTT · 29/09/2021 11:34

Collaborate has given you specific advice under which you should consult a solicitor. That becomes option 1 for keeping a roof over your head.

Without discussing it with him, you could also consult the local housing department to see if they could help you. Housing availability across the UK isn’t uniform and you maybe in an area where they can help you. Don’t tell him you are doing this and don’t tell him the outcome.

Shmithecat2 · 29/09/2021 20:37

It is possible that the OP could make an application under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989 for a transfer of property Order, even if they're not married. Good luck OP. What shit he is.

prh47bridge · 30/09/2021 07:38

This is interesting and I would never disagree with you. If they are not married and the tenancy or ownership is in his name what legal right does she have to stay?

She doesn't have an automatic right to stay but she can apply for an occupation order that would give her that right. Longer term, as there are children involved, an application under Schedule 1 of the Children Act and/or TOLATA could give her the right to remain until the children leave school.

Finknottlesnewt · 30/09/2021 23:15

Cannot believe the 'definite' advice spouted by people on this thread. It's LEGAL not AIBU !!

The OP should be looking at legal advice in relation to schedule 1 of the children's Act 1989. There are provisions in the act for various orders for the other parent to be required to provide housing / money for the children. Including the transfer of property .

Giving wrong advice such as ' you don't have any rights - go to the council, ' is shocking . If your legal knowledge is based on 'what you think you know' rather than what you actually know - then don't post opinion in legal. It's worse than no advice it's actually harmful . !

Collaborate · 01/10/2021 09:33

@Finknottlesnewt

Cannot believe the 'definite' advice spouted by people on this thread. It's LEGAL not AIBU !!

The OP should be looking at legal advice in relation to schedule 1 of the children's Act 1989. There are provisions in the act for various orders for the other parent to be required to provide housing / money for the children. Including the transfer of property .

Giving wrong advice such as ' you don't have any rights - go to the council, ' is shocking . If your legal knowledge is based on 'what you think you know' rather than what you actually know - then don't post opinion in legal. It's worse than no advice it's actually harmful . !

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