Evening all, I’m looking for advice/experience. Ex has threatened (and threats are normally followed through on) to take me back to court for allegedly breaching our CAO. The reality is I have never stopped or stood in the way of contact. However eldest refuses to have contact (they have told Ex this and why many times and I’ve continued to explore this and encourage DC to revisit decisions and thinking) and youngest sees Ex in line with CAO however this has not been over night since the start of Covid - this is not something I have initiated or requested rather they have worked out between them. All phone and additional contacts like birthdays, Xmas etc all take place they may just not be the full time ie 10-5 rather than 8.30-6 again I’ve not played a role in the hours variation it’s been agreed between them. Carcass were involved over nearly 20m of court hearings (4 reports due to mental health of kids and emotional abuse). Ex has over last 6m tried to engage me to work through the past/our relationship dressed up as coparenting, so we can “move forward” but Ex was emotionally abusive and threatening through out separation and court proceedings and there is nothing Ex can say that a) I want to hear b) that will change the past c) will change the support I offer DCs relationship with Ex. And d) will be honest. Simply I need to protect myself to be the best parent I can so I have declined as I want to keep moving forward.
I had hoped with time and the completion of proceedings that DC would settle and contact may grow and evolve naturally but that hasn’t happened and Ex has run out of patience (despite it being his behaviour that resulted in the carcass recommendation and DC distress and anxiety)
Any experience of returning to court in these circumstances? DC are Y6 and Y7 at school, described by carcass as emotionally mature well beyond their years and the previous alienation allegation made by Ex against me was thrown out of court by the judge. I understand Ex wants more but DC don’t at this time and further court proceedings have a high probability of destabilising their MH recovery and this fills me with dread. We were just starting to make some progress with them feeling safe.