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School choices ExDH

2 replies

SpaceRaiders · 26/09/2020 15:24

Can anyone shed any light on this situation?

In brief; We’re divorced with two dc. One more academic than the other. I’m starting to make plans for 11+ & common entrance for our eldest with additional tutoring support as the school isn’t very good at stretching more able pupils. However younger dc has really struggled with the current setting for the last two years. I’ve lost faith with the school and I’ve proposed we move dc2 to a small Indy school 8 miles away with fantastic pastoral care as well as dyslexia support whilst dd1 remains where she is until Y6. Of course I’d be doing double school runs, practicalities for which I’ve considered, paying fees and there’s no impact on his EOW contact or mid week contact when he chooses to do it!

Ex on the other hand has very little contact with the current school doesn’t really understand the issues, he doesn’t see the dc2’s anxiety in the mornings, he’s barely been to any parent teacher consultations and is now against moving dc2. Post divorce on the odd occasion an activity falls during “his time” think birthday parties, swimming, extra curricular activities he refuses to take them meaning they either miss out or I have to find work arounds that are often more expensive, like 1-2-1 swimming this term for example.

I just want what’s best for dc. And I’ve held off rocking the boat in the hopes that dc would settle. That hasn’t happened, if anything their behind.

We’ve been through a long and arduous CAO 3 years ago and the idea that we simply can’t agree on schooling in the coming years is giving me huge anxiety already.

My question is what happens when we can’t agree?

OP posts:
prh47bridge · 26/09/2020 18:33

Your ex is entitled to a say in your children's education. If you cannot agree you will have to apply to the courts for a specific issue order to resolve the matter.

SpaceRaiders · 26/09/2020 19:59

I hope my post didn’t come across as though I was arguing that he shouldn’t get a say! Far from it. I’ve consulted him, he wants to wait and see. Meanwhile dc has immediate needs which the school aren’t meeting. An SIO will take months if not a year, meanwhile dc is struggling with anxiety.

I am very tempted to take my chances. I have very good reasons of moving her which I’m more than happy to provide to the courts.

OP posts:
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