Would an nfa from children's services go against me in court?

[Newmummy20181]

Ex was abusive to both dd and i in the past, he now has contact with her. She had come back with some bruising on her arms, now ex is notorious for making allegations against me especially if I raise concerns about dd in his care.. saying I'm trying to stop contact instead of just seeing it for what it is which is me making sure dd is safe and happy. So I didn't approach him about the subject as I knew it would just end in an argument and instead took dd to a&e upon the advice of a child protection service. Children's services then got involved, fast forward to now and the case has been nfa (no further action). At no point did I stop contact, even while cs were looking into it. But now I'm afraid this will go against me in court as I didn't speak to ex about it.. don't get me wrong I know I should have but I also know that it would have resulted in an argument not even related to the bruising and more allegations. Well I have those now anyway. Oh and dd is non verbal so now way to find out from her what happened.

Would all of this go against me?

Bump

How old is dd? Do you think your ex has been hurting her ?

Hi @RedHelenB, dd is coming up for two however isn't verbal as she had a regression in speech.

I do think he has been hurting her, although not deliberately, I think he is quite rough when handling dd especially with stuff like nappy changes but if I try to raise a concern he goes to his solicitor or court to make it seem like Im being obstructive. I quite literally cannot raise a single issue without this happening.

Hi, sorry to hear about what's happening. I hope you and your dd is ok, clearly you were and are acting in her best interests.

Your ex sounds like a bullying narcissist. This article may help you, at least you can understand more about the type of person you're dealing with www.flip.co.uk/are-they-gaslighting-you-how-to-cope-with-a-narcissist-in-the-family-justice-system/

instead took dd to a&e upon the advice of a child protection service. Children's services then got involved, fast forward to now and the case has been nfa (no further action).

So you did what you should do when you see your daughter has an injury.

But now I'm afraid this will go against me in court as I didn't speak to ex about it..

You don't need to necessarily need to "speak to him" about it.

You should inform him after she was treated by A&E that she had an injury and the outcome - how you communicate with him each time depends on the injury and outcome.

On this occasion, you couldn't because Children's Services decided to investigate you both.

One thing you need to learn is you can't control what he does with your joint daughter in his time and therefore you don't make suggestions to him. Instead you try and do all correspondence by email, keep the emails short and business-like. You need to avoid an email conversation with him by not answering any questions unless they need to be answered.

As long as its presented as looking after your dds welfare and not a vendetta against your ex I cant see why there would be an issue. Toddlers fall and bump into things all the time, my 3 dc were always covered in bruises.

It's because it was on the inside of dds arm where I've never seen or known her to get bruises in the past. It happened once and I was unsure, then it happened again so I took a photo and noted it down, then it happened a third time which is when I took action.

And children's services told me not to contact him about it as they would be calling him, this was the emergency team and as it was the weekend it had to wait a couple of days