Breaking a court order

[SabrinaJo1]

Hi guys. I need a bit of advice.
After a very lengthy court process finally came to a close (ish) about 8 months ago the outcome was the children’s father who was a proven alcoholic drug addicted abuser was ordered to wear a tag that monitored his alcohol consumption when around the children (which is a joke, all along it was supposed to be full abstinence but we had a new judge for the last hearing who downgraded it to just around the kids).

Well COVID hit and it threw a bit of a spanner in the works. Long story short, contact started back up over the holidays and I let the children go for 3 of the 6 weeks. Very concerned with what they have came out with, about having to camp as father didn’t have accommodation, the children came back just how you would imagine after 3 weeks of this. They had been told very manipulative and bad things which shouldn’t have happened, but ultimately, I know my responsibility would be to pick up the pieces after contacts like this.
However after being out with the children the other day and walking past a bunch of people who stunk of weed, both my children said that’s what their father smoked the entire 3 weeks. I asked if he did it in front of them and my daughter said he would usually get out of the car to do it. She said a lot of other things which is very clear and indicative.

What do I do!? My solicitor is useless and does not care, Social are the same.
I posted previously about the nightmare we have been subjected to, my ex has abused and manipulated the system but thankfully nobody was fooled in the end and they all saw him for what he is. But alas, everyone is sick of the situation, as am I.

But he is supposed to be sober for damn good reason around the children! The tag never monitored drugs just alcohol, a issue I brought up but was told I needed to have faith.

I don’t want to break court order but I cannot put my children in a situation so dangerous, it was one of the reasons we fled from him.

I feel alone and that anything I do I’m gonna have to maybe do alone. I would really like to hear if anybody has been through similar and how they got it sorted.

Kind regards.
Sabrina x

Sounds like you need to take it back to court for a variation. Presumably the arrangements were made on the basis that he had a home that was more substantial than a tent, and smoking pot whilst in charge of the kids will be a concern not taken in to account when the order was made.

I couldn't advise you to break the order in the interim, not least because I've only read your post here, so don't know enough about your circumstances.

Thanks for your response.
Yes I’m aware I would most probably have to vary the order, without a solicitor though I’m slightly lost and was wondering how I would even go about doing that?

There was a similar situation which happened during the court case and again it was over his drug use in front of the children. CAFCASS said the concern was upheld, the father tried punitive damages and anything he could to punish me for stopping contact but in the courtroom the judge said I was absolutely correct to do so.

I do understand nobody will be able to advise me to break a court order, it’s something I have to do though in the situation as it’s that severe given the history, of which the court is aware. However Iv always had my solicitor through legal aid help me. This one I’m pretty much alone and don’t really know where to start.

Get a MIAM certificate and then complete a C100. Ask for an urgent hearing and tell the court you are refusing unsupervised contact in the interim owing to safeguarding concerns.

How old are the children?

The children are 5 and 8.

So little update, my daughter had an appointment today that has been Scheduled for a year and a half. She apparently has told the clinical psychologist about the drugs and things I didn’t even know about which happens when they are away, anyway I later got a call from the doctor she saw and they have informed me they have spoke to social and will be raising a safeguarding concern themselves as she is concerned for the children’s saftey in his care!

I have emailed my solicitor and told them this and that I won’t be letting it go ahead, so what options do I have legally to minimise any problems my end, but as yet they have not replied or returning any of my calls. Which is typical of my solicitors, they really don’t want to do anything.

So I am awaiting / hoping the solicitors eventually get back if I badger them enough. If they don’t help or want to help I will be doing what @Collaborate has suggested.
Although I will probably just do the C100 form as we have been told mediation isn’t suitable for us due to the abuse and criminal proceedings against the children’s father.

bump for you OP

i would not let mine go in these circumstances either

He sounds awful. I wouldn't be happy for the children to see him either. When is he next due to see them? Hopefully SS will contact you quickly & you can use them to backup your concerns. You've mentioned you are unhappy wit your solicitor, perhaps look at another one too?

Next due a week today.
Trust me, you wouldn’t even believe the things this man has done and continues to do.
Well, @PrincessForADay I was hoping that it was good enough at this short juncture to Use the referral from the clinical psychologist my daughter is under and can verify the claims to immediately stop it pending investigation from SS.
However there is a court order and I have to take the appropriate steps as best I can. One of which is concerns will be spoken about with the other party before raising. So I did get my mother to text him tonight asking if he was under the influence while looking after the children. He will undoubtably text back over the weekend that he wasn’t however he will be unaware of the evidence against him. I hope this firstly would show I am taking the best steps I can in the situation, but more so show that he is even more deceptive and prove it’s pointless me communicating with him as he just lies.

I will fill in a C100 and submit before next contact and then make him aware of this and tell him contact will be suspended in the interim.
It’s too unsafe, contact needs to be in my opinion placed into a supervised contact Center until he can prove he is free and clean of the drug and alcohol addiction.
I really don’t think that is a terrible ask.

There's no way I'd let him have my kids - apply for supervised contact only in a contact centre . In the meantime keep them home and safe
And he can make an application for an enforcement of an order in the meantime if he so wishes