Help with custody of children!

[Imylil33]

My partner and I separated 4 years ago. We have had an agreement up until now that he had them over night every other weekend and mon and weds after school. Now he is being made homeless and hes find out I'm pregnant by a new partner he wants full custody of all 3 children so he can get on the council list to get a property. I have refused joint custody as he works full time and I am a stay at home parent and I obvioysly want them to stay with me whilst he has visitation. Am I wrong in this situation?? We've had a huge row and hes threatening to take me to court I am scared.

You being pregnant shouldn't and won't be seen as a viable reason for him to take full custody away from you of your children. Unless he can evidence genuine concerns of neglect, the courts will always be of the belief a child sees both mother and father.

The courts will always favour what is best for the children, not what is best for the parents.

If he works full time then what is his reason to not finding another house/flat etc to rent? If he continues making threats, I would imitate mediation so if needed you can progress to court to have your arrangement formalised for the sake of the children. He can't just 'take you to court' and he will have to go through family mediation first even if it's for an interview/discussion. Him making threats isn't going to do you any good and the children will pick up on it.

Congratulations on the pregnancy too!

Thank you @BingeOnChocolate I just needed reassurance that I'm not doing a bad thing here. I have organised a mediation session via video call with a professional for next Thursday. I've said all contact should go through that now. There is no reason he cant look for a private renting property, in his own words he doesn't want to pay the high rates for rent. My daughter has come back upset tonight from his as hes told her he cant see her anymore because he has nowhere to live. But I haven't stopped all contact at all it's quite obvious he cant have sleep overs as he doesn't have a place to do this. Day time visitation was still available to him but hes accused me of not being letting him be a father.

Order a simple diary and document everything in it. You will thank yourself later in keeping a record of when things like your DD coming home distressed because he's sharing grown up views with her. Ensure any comments or statement she makes is in there but be sure not to ask 101 questions as children might feel they have to say XYZ because a parents fishing. The courts do not favour this behaviour at all - a child in their view should not be placed in the middle with parent a stating they can't see the child because of parent b. Also keep in the diary the times he's late, fails contact, let's the children down or makes a threat. It will all be useful for a position statement and fact-find if needed.

Unfortunately he will have to do what everyone else does within the rental community which is pay high rent for small properties.

Thank you very much for your advice. I will do that and hopefully it gets me to where I need to be. I also said that to him that he needs to be a grown up and if he wants the children overnight then to secure a roof over his head to do that.