Help please- no clue with separation of assets (not married)

[KittyConCarne]

Ex partner & I have 2 biological DC.
We have a mortgage of approx £90k which we've paid for 15 years (37yr mortgage/ 22 years left to run).
House was valued May 2019 at £180k.

My lovely Dad passed away at Christmas (his bday today as it happens- bit surreal...), and my mum has so kindly offered to pay my ex partner out of the house/ mortgage as an early inheritance to me (to be made equal by some trust document showing my DBro receiving an equivalent higher equity proportion in my parents house).

So I need to just get a few estate agents round to value it now?
And ring Halifax and ask what the current remaining mortgage is, and do the maths, and write a simple contract stating ex DP received X figure as full and final settlement/ no further interest in house, get a solicitor to look it over & check my figures, and then we both sign it/ get witnesses?/ then Mum transfers the money to ex DP and it's sorted?

Theres a few complications with money I'm meant to be allowed to take from the equity before we split it 50/50, and then I get into sorting my own mortgage & everything else, my entire life...organising & rescheduling & changing bank details for everything in my whole world...I feel really overwhelmed right now, and was just trying to simplify/ break down how I sort this first step to rebuilding and sorting all the financial stuff.I

Please can anyone she's any light on where I get legal advice or how to do any of this?
Thank you

Make an appointment to see a solicitor. We offer a fixed fee initial appointment and a fixed fee for an agreed consent order, which is what you’ll need.

Thank you Collaborate
I've received an email back from a local solicitor who states £250 +vat for a discussion appointment (1-1.5 hrs), but doesn't state a fee for the agreed consent order.
I phoned CAB and they referred me to "College Chambers" for a free 20min call back from legal professional, but I've had no call so far- will chase tomorrow.

But I think I'll go ahead with booking an appointment with this solicitor anyway- only thing is they say they're only doing remote appointments so I'll need to be at home on phone or webcam....that'll be a mission with feral DD2 4yr old here arghh...

I'm restricted to 2pm Thursday's til 2pm Fridays for my only time without DD1 & 2 in tow. But even then, ex-DP comes to our house while I leave for 24 hours for some freedom lol..but then in reality I fit everything; shopping/ mum & mil visits&shopping/ relaxing into those 24 hours. Feeling hard done by lol, sorry.

This is all achievable, just need to get some more wheels in motion.
Thank you for your help :)

Was about to write a separate post, then thought might as well just ask on here.

I wondered if anybody might have any ideas on some of the other legal/ financial/ moral issues I'm looking at right now?
Any suggestions or advice would be much appreciated :)

Err...not sure where to start...

First off, my assumption of a non-married couple separating with a joint mortgage is that they are Joint Tenants and as such get a 50/50 share of the house equity?

I remember we had the opportunity to be "Tenants in Common", but didn't follow that route in the end, and so we're just a normal "Joint Tenancy"?

The fact I have young children and hope to continue to reside in the family home bears no weight whatsoever on the equity share does it?
I'm really sure thats the case isn't it? That I cannot ask for a higher equity share because I am sole resident parent etc?
I could only start that argument if we were married can't I?
That's the financial protection that marriage offers is it?

It's just that....I have a slight issue in that my lovely elderly mother who is hopefully financially bailing me out of my idiotic life....is convinced that the equity split is legally more for the residing single parent or....is definitely shared by the residing children too so overall more equity held by remaining parent & 2 DC combined.

She is wrong isn't she? It's just that I'm relying on her alone to finance this plan, and if I annoy her anymore she's going to withdraw support...I've tried arguing that's for marriage/ divorce only, and that actually morally I feel a bit shit about taking more equity than him because we've never been high earners/ always just put all our minimum wages in the pot for the house- we've both paid equals towards the house over the years so why should I morally get more?

And that's with me counting the 7 years maternity/ health/ career breaks I've had over the past 15 years of owning our mortgage as a valid equal house "payment" as with me being practically sole parent whilst he improved his career, he would have spent far more on nannies blah blah whatever.

Ex-DP has always stated and expects equals back- 50/50.
And that's what I think he's entitled to and I morally feel happy with...it is the legal standpoint for an unmarried couple too isn't it please?

Sorry - just looked at this again and see you aren’t married. No consent order then.

You need a conveyancing solicitor, but first apply to the lender for a remortgage to replace the existing one.

Thanks again Collaborate

I can't take on the joint mortgage in my name alone as I have no income (awaiting UC benefit/ civil servant career break til Feb 21).

Brother has offered but recently stated thinks can't have joint mortgage with me as doesn't live at this address? Haven't explored this further yet, but he's a 50k self employed (CIS worker) who owns/ lives in his mobile home, no debt, trust him implicitly blah blah.

But ex-DP has offered to continue being on the joint mortgage with me, but he won't be paying anything towards the house (I'm not sure how it works if I default etc...need advice clueless googling here), so I can continue living here with the girls.

I can afford it very very tightly on UC, but I'm 100% mortgage won't allow/ count my benefit income, so can't go it alone.

So I need a document stating his equity claim to house ceases after his lump sum payment of current equity, but that he agrees to continue to be a named joint mortgage holder until say youngest DD2 is 18?

We're currently on a Halifax variable rate and I'd like to switch to a 5 yr fixed rate with an extension of 7 years to the current 22 year term (taking it up to my 65th birthday), which according to their calculator will halve my monthly repayments. I can overpay again in the future once I'm back on my feet working? But I need short term drastic financial cuts asap so I need to just crack on for the long term benefit of keeping the house- I'd never get a house like this again in this area with such a small deposit if I was to sell up to get my equity out too.
Do I need to let the mortgage company know

Sorry, I know this is legal board, but from what you say it really doesn’t sound line you can afford it? I dont say that to be unkind

Are there any other options ?

I was going to say the same, could you move to a cheaper property?

You can’t afford to buy him out at the moment. You can’t just pay him half of the equity while he remains the legal joint owner and liable for the mortgage for the next 25 years. Will your mother guarantee a sole mortgage for you or give you the money to buy him out and pay off the mortgage? Otherwise you may need to move.