Residency order?

[confusedde]

I'm confused by this whole process.
DC 2, lives alone with me, always has done.
Emotional abusive ex, sees dc sporadically, if he feels like it 🙄
I wanted to apply for a residency order so that:
A) it says dc legally lives with me
B) if ex wants to see dc then it is set out formally.

Was told I could apply using c100 form but needed to tick mediation off the list first.

Have now spoken to a company through civil legal advice and they say I cannot apply for a residency order (now a live with order) as dc already lives with me and ex will still have say over all parental decisions. School trips, holidays etc.
They said I can try mediation in regards to contact or use their service whereby they will write to ex to establish contact schedule.

Fwiw ex has never been alone with dc, contact would have to be with me present.

Can anyone advise further?

I think you may have misinterpreted (slightly) the advice you received.

You can apply for an order, but in the circumstances you describe:

1. You won't get legal aid, because you don't pass the reasonableness test.
2. The court is unlikely to give you an order because there is no need for an order. You aren't asking the court to change the existing arrangements.
3. Surely you have some idea that at present the court system is seriously fucked up with a huge backlog. You would be clogging up the system with a meaningless application, delaying parents with more serious issues getting heard.

@Collaborate How is it unnecessary?
How can you deem that my application is meaningless based on a few words on Mumsnet?
Retorical questions in case that wasn't clear.

How can I access the information for this reasonable test?

The court always follows the 'no order' principle meaning that they will follow the least interventionist option. If your DC lives with you and the ex isn't contesting that there is really no need for a child arrangement order. Having a court order for his contact won't make him any more reliable.
Child arrangement orders aren't used just to formalise the status quo. As far as the courts are concerned you and ex have agreed arrangements so an order is unnecessary.

What are you hoping that an order will achieve?

I'm aware it won't make him reliable.

Im worried if he decided to take dc then I have no powers.

Is he likely to? You could apply for a prohibited steps order if you have a serious concern that he might do something. Otherwise you would need to apply for an emergency child arrangement order in the event that he does take them. To be perfectly honest you'd have to apply to court to enforce a court order anyway even if you had one.

You don't pass the reasonableness test because anyone expecting to fund their own case is unlikely to pay a few thousand for a lawyer to represent them. The first reason for this is that legally you're unlikely to get the order you seek, so your case has a less than 50% chance of success. The second is that even if by some miracle you did get that order nothing is going to change on the ground.