Absent father, name change

[Steffnee]

Hi!
I’m looking for any advice anyone can offer on legally changing a child’s name when one parent (named on birth certificate but not married) is absent. My daughter has not seen her biological dad for nearly 8 years and wants to change her name to that of her stepdad, me and her younger brother. Her bio dad was awful, not physically but just not a nice person. We’d love to have a family holiday but terrified I’d have to contact her bio dad for permission for a passport.. any advice, deedpoll/courts etc would be extremely appreciated from someone who’s been through it! Thanks x

To change the name you need a court order or permission from all with parental responsibility so you would need to contact him.

Same with going abroad. Might not be a problem but if stopped you could be asked to show permission.

The passport won't be a problem because you just need 1 parents details. There are sections for the other parents and grandparents but you can just fill in yours and attach a note explaining no contact or details not known.

Ooh that’s tricky isn’t it! So I could possibly get a passport but be questioned on it? Aargh! Like, I understand why these rules are in place but it kind of makes you stuck in limbo when one parent buggers off! He was all about control and would use daughter to hurt me so I know that if I do find him, he’ll say no 😩

My ex was the same but luckily I got a residency order which means I can legally take the children out of the country for a month without his permission.

We flew to America and with different surnames I had to take their birth certificates, deed poll certificate, residency order, my marriage certificate and divorce certificate just in case and to show timeline of my name change and their name change too.

These days you want a child arrangements order saying that your daughter lives with you. If you get that you can legally take her out of the country for up to one month without the father's consent. That should be enough for any holidays.

Changing her name is another matter. You need his consent or a court order allowing the name change. The courts are reluctant to allow name changes to remove the father's surname, particularly if there is no contact. When she is older she will be able to choose for herself.