He won't leave and isn't paying towards the bills

[Weffiepops]

Hi my ex is not on my mortgage, has lived with me for 6 years. First 3 years he was lovely, last 3 years (after I'd had his child and he thought he was on the mortgage) he turned shouty controlling and was always calling me and my eldest names like ugly lazy stupid. Anyhow over the last few months I've told him it's over and I want him to leave. He earns £25k per year so should be able to fend for himself but he's got an expensive car and has ran up £6k on high interest (25%) credit cards so spends most of his wages paying that. Early in the relationship he did lots of work to the house and now claims he wants thousands back and won't leave till he gets it. I know I can kick him out tomorrow and police will support me but I need to know if the money he is not contributing now will be taken off any sum I owe him. So if I let him stay here for 3 more months, that's £600 x 3 which he should have contributed towards household bills, is that taken off any sum I owe him? By the way he is on best behaviour now and doesn't shout or call names because he knows I would throw him out in a heartbeat.

I'm not sure anyone outside your relationship will agree you owe him any money.

Are you married?

I do think asking the police for help will be a good idea.
Do you have any evidence of his abusive behaviour? Texts etc

You don’t owe him anything for work he did to a house he was living in - we recarpeted our last rental, we didn’t refuse to leave until she paid us for our carpet!

Give him a little bit if you think it’s right, but you don’t legally owe him anything

No we're not married. And just to clarify bills, he paid £300 per month and I paid £900 per month in first 3 years but I was on the mortgage and he wasn't. It's an interest only mortgage. When I was close to having our child 3 years ago, I applied to have him on mortgage and asked him to pay £600pm and me pay £600pm. For the last year after finding out he's not on the mortgage (he was vile to my daughter so I stopped the application) he has paid nothing!

Also he built a conservatory and porch and remodelled garden and refitted kitchen. We both put in half and half for materials but he did the work. This is why he thinks I owe him £15k and I think I owe him £3k

You're not married and he's not on the deeds - change the locks while he is out and put his stuff in the shed/storage/street

I'm not sure if you can change the locks if it's his home.
Hopefully someone will be along who will know more.

I feel like the most useful thing might be to gather together documentation of the abuse and get an order through court to state that you can stay in the house and he has to leave.

www.familylaw.co.uk/news_and_comment/changing-the-locks-on-the-family-home-following-separation

Ah sorry CV - this would imply you can change them, I think.

Could you see if there's a solicitor who can give you a free half hour?

I don’t think you owe him a penny, doing work on a house you’re living in is completely normal and he shouldn’t be paid for it

What about all the work you do? I imagine from the fact he’s paid no bills recently means he’s done little else of use round the house?

Good luck getting him out!

Legally and morally as far as I know you owe him nothing. Tell him to leave your house and if he refuses call the police. You are not married and it's your house, he has no claim to any of it!

Any work he has done while living there was for all of your benefit and can not be retrospectively 'claimed back' because you no longer want to be in a relationship with him. Tell him to contact a solicitor after he leaves if he believes he is entitled to anything.

You need to get proper legal advice rather than relying on internet randoms. The fact he has paid some of the cost of materials for the conservatory, etc. may mean he has established a claim to some of the equity in the property. The fact you applied to have him added to the mortgage and he believed this had happened may also give him a claim if he has acted to his detriment relying on that belief. That doesn't necessarily mean you owe him as much as he thinks you do, of course, but there isn't enough information here to say how much he might be able to claim.

I know that the police will help me to get him out because I nearly went down that route. They have told me that if he's not on the mortgage then he doesn't have a right to be there and they will escort him off the premises.

I'm posting here in case anyone has been through something similar or in case there is someone who works in law who knows the principles.

Are you saying that he was paying £300 and you £900, then you agreed to put him on the mortgage so changed it to £600 each, half and half, which he has paid for three years thinking he was on the mortgage but wasn't?

If that's the case, I don't blame him at all. That's quite a deceiving move. Whether he could claim on the work he's done and the fact that he could claim he was paying towards the mortgage, no-one can say but a judge, but yes, he could possibly have a case if the above is true and he can indeed prove an application was filled in and there was never any talk of him paying rent. The work will depend on what arrangement was in place when he did it, who paid for the materials, how much work did it involved etc...

He can complete an official application under home rights as having an interest in the property, which would prevent the property being sold or remortgaged until the dispute was settled. If he has paid money toward the property he could be awarded a percentage of the property.

This wouldn't stop you kicking him out now or give him any rights to live in the property. I can see if he has paid thousands toward extended your home when you had told him he was on the mortgage, that he would want to be compensated for this. You deceived him.

I'm posting here in case anyone has been through something similar or in case there is someone who works in law who knows the principles

This is a complex area of law. You need to see a solicitor. However, the principles are:

• the house is in your name. The starting point is therefore that it is yours

• By purchasing materials used for building a conservatory, etc. he may have established a claim to some of the equity in the property

• The fact you led him to believe he was on the mortgage may also give him a claim to some of the equity if he has acted to his detriment based on this belief

• Amounts he pays (or doesn't pay) towards household bills are not relevant

He paid £600 for 2 years and nothing for the last year, not £600 for 3 years. £300 was light for 3 years, he should have been paying more but I was a mug!

Thanks prh47bridge. I'll see a solicitor soon

You are pretty much saying you deceived him into believing he has an interest in the property. That will be enough for him to make a legal claim. I would suggest a visit to a solicitor and that you be transparent. Far better to get an idea about how much you are liable for and to sort it out without going to court.