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Original poster

How do we pay maintenance

16 replies

Boneshere · 09/04/2019 20:44

DH wants to pay maintenance for his child, mother won't apply for it or accept money.

How do we get this money to his child?

He doesn't see his son, they live very far away and she accused him of all sorts and his son ended up not wanting to see him due to parental alienation.

OP posts:
Racmactac · 09/04/2019 20:45

I'd probably put it into a bank account for him for when he's older.

RandomMess · 09/04/2019 20:46

Open a savings account for the child

Original poster
Boneshere · 09/04/2019 20:47

He isn't on his birth certificate so I don't think we can open an account for him.

OP posts:
slipperywhensparticus · 09/04/2019 20:52

True but he can go to court get put on the birth certificate then take that and open an account

slipperywhensparticus · 09/04/2019 20:52

Or he can get a copy of the birth certificate and use that to open an account

lazymoz · 09/04/2019 20:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Boneshere · 09/04/2019 20:58

Oh can you @lazymoz ? Thanks! We were lead to believe it was on here to open a case. Thanks he will call them tomorrow

OP posts:
Original poster
Boneshere · 09/04/2019 20:58

Her*

OP posts:
lazymoz · 09/04/2019 21:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

morewashingtodooo · 09/04/2019 21:27

If she's not receiving money and the dad isn't having contact I'm guessing she is waiting for the time she can apply to remove his pr or get the dc adopt by her partner

Original poster
Boneshere · 09/04/2019 22:15

It is a bit of a mess, he didn't know the child existed until he was about 14 months old! He went to court and got contact but things went downhill fast and then she up and left for the other end of the UK. Then the parental alienation started and his son was so upset coming here, it wasn't fair he was throwing up etc. We don't know where she is with his son or anything. We have an email address but it now bounces emails back, so obviously has been deleted. Obviously, he could do more, he knows that but DH is disabled and I his carer and I would have to drive him and already have to take my own children to their fathers. It's a mess.

OP posts:
MidniteScribbler · 09/04/2019 23:50

At the very least, I would pay the equivalent of what he would be paying into a separate bank account (not necessily in the child's name, just in the father's name) and at least when the child comes looking for him in the future, he can show that he still made an effort, at least financially.

RedHelenB · 10/04/2019 07:29

Start the account now. Also put extra in for birthdays/ Christmas/ cost of Easter eggs etc. Then when the son inevitably comes looking for him you can prove you wanted to pay. Also, social media may get a good way to try to find his sons whereabouts.

Collaborate · 10/04/2019 07:37

If I were him I wouldn't go through CMS. He should certainly open an account for the child and start paying in now at CMS rates.

Bluelonerose · 10/04/2019 07:45

Firstly he needs to set up an account and pay a monthly amount into their for his child.

Next what I would do is write letters to his child and date them. Keep them all then if contact happens later on he can show him he's bee. Thinking about him over the years.

What about her family?
Are they on social media? Can you track them down?
Also I would see if you can talk to a solicitor? Again keep all letters etc as proof he's been trying.

GarthFunkel · 10/04/2019 08:02

Did he get parental responsibility as part of the court order for access?

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