How should we divide equity?

[Timeforcuppa]

Ex and I purchased house. After split, ex moved out and I’ve lived in house with DC. Never married.

Ex and I both put in same initial deposit. Joint mortgage but ex has paid 20% mortgage, I have paid 80% of mortgage.

I have maintained house - nothing major but kept house in good condition, taken care of all minor repairs/garden work etc. Ex has done nothing.

Equity from house = £200K. Who should get what?

My post saidIf the intention was to own equally, and the presumption is there because you hold as joint tenants, the proceeds would be divided equally.
I agree with Collaborate re the legal position as my first post stated exactly as she said. However I stand by my comment that there isn't anything stopping you negotiating, whether that is trying it on or not.

trying it on = asking ex to support OP to provide a home for their joint children. It's clear what the legal position is. Miraculously there are still a few decent people on the planet who are willing to do what's reasonable to support their own children. Not many though.

asking ex to support OP to provide a home for their joint children

As per Collaborate's post, the OP can get the court to delay the sale of the house if her share of the proceeds would not be enough to rehouse her children. Asking for that would not be trying it on. Asking for substantially more than 50% of the proceeds when the house is eventually sold is definitely trying it on.

Thank you @kbPOW and @Jon65 I will try to negotiate by your suggestion.

@prh47bridge & @Collaborate - you might know the law but you clearly have no tact. Stating my situation is 'trying it on' is so rude and patronising. Do you speak to your clients like that? They is a certain way with words and both of you clearly lack it!

A few points to consider:

• Ex earns 5 x more than me. He may have been paying similar rent elsewhere but earns much more than I do. Why...?
• Because I have been looking after DC for the majority of the time I work PT. I could work FT but that would mean DC in breakfast/after school clubs. I think barely seeing one parent is enough!
• I have focused solely on DC for years whilst ex barely sees them and travels often.
• We are not two single people dividing a house. I have DC the majority of the time and need at least a 2 bed property in one of the most expensive parts of the country.
• Dividing the equity and how much I end up with is crucial for securing a house with DC.
• Ex can easily get a much bigger mortgage independently because he earns 5 x much as me.
• In comparison I can only afford a small mortgage myself and will not be able to buy anything in this area as it is.
• If DC were not in the equation this wouldn't be an issue. The fact is I need a bigger house because the DC live with me for the majority of the time and I want the best for them so I believe we should get a higher percentage of the equity in order to do that.
• Ex may agree and at no point have I said we will be going to court!
• I have seen a solicitor who suggested similar calculations to those offered in this thread. At no point did she insinuate I was 'trying it on' - quite the opposite!

Family law is outdated. 50/50 might be the legal understanding when dividing equity but it is wrong from a moral prospective for all the points I've mentioned above & needs changing.

Sometimes being blunt is necessary when trying to communicate with those who prefer to believe what makes them feel comfortable rather than face reality.

Anyway, I do prefer to offer advice to those willing to receive it, so do go ahead and do what you want. I’m out of here.

I'm sorry but @Collaborate is spot on.
All of those things you mention in your last post may be relevant if you were married but you are not.

The best you would get if you went to court would be 50/50. Now he may be a nice considerate man that will agree to less but I doubt it.

Sorry OP but if you wanted those things considered you needed to get married. They are not considered in your situation.