Who's responsibility is childcare cover?

[ChasingPea]

Morning folks.

My ex and I are at a disagreement and I wondered if anyone knew my legal position, and whether it's worth me going back to mediation to end up with a child arrangement order. We don't currently have one.

Ex pays child maintenance via CMS and has child two nights per week, one of these falls on a weeknight.

I pay for all childcare. Regular childminder is on holiday for a week soon and as much as I've tried, I can't seem to find an alternative childminder so I'm having to take some time off that week.

I've told him that his overnight in the week, he'll need to sort a family member picking child up, or take a couple of hours off work.

He is (nasty as usual) explaining that he pays CM and so everything is my responsibility to sort.

I've said that I appreciate PAYING for childcare is my responsibility, along with paying for everything else, but that organising cover on his days isn't.

This is a tiny dot on a long list of typical EA narcissistic, controlling behaviour. Is he right? Am I right? Is it worth me going to mediation/court to get a CAO so everything is in black and white and there's no quibbling about this kind of stuff? He says I'm the 'primary parent with sole responsibility' but this is only when it's convenient. When he's not feeling hard done to suddenly it's "I get a say in XYZ too"

So does he still want the child for that overnight, but he expects you to have them during the day, and bring them to you?

Hi Butterymuffin.
Yes he still wants the child (because it goes towards his 2 nights a week CMS calcluation), but he's expecting me or my family to take time off work and make the child available to him when he's then available.

Childcare in his time is his responsibility imo..
Twats use the cms card when it suits.

I agree, but I wasn't sure what the legal position is.
He's just said that he gets to pick the days he wants the child, not a court, not me etc. So it looks like I'll be going to court for a child arrangement order. It's fine by me, just wondered if there was a way of avoiding it, but it's been a long time coming to be honest.

If the normal agreement is to collect the dc after childcare, than it must be at a certain time. So no he doesn't have to arrange childcare or take time off.
Rp's get help with childcare based on the income for the child and that's why they usual are expected to pay for the additional cost.
But saying that morally he should help and support his child, and help when needed. My exh is like this, my car broke down and I had to hire a car for two weeks, he didn't help once with collecting from school even though he's meant to on a Friday but drop it over the last year as he couldn't leave work earlier anymore and I was expected to
Cover. And it's court ordered.

Hi,
I would agree if I could then pay for alternative childcare (which I'd be happy to do), but the school is rural and no other childcare provider does school pick ups from there.
Am I really expected to take half a day off work in those instances?

Wait sorry I thought the child went to a childminder all day? So why doesn't he collect from school on those days?

Child goes to school, childminder picks up from school and I pay the fee for her to have the child until I finish work every day.
On his days he picks her up from the childminder.
Childminder is on holiday and I can't find an alternative nursery so I've said he'll need to pick her up from school.

As there is no court order the legal position is that it is up to you and your ex to sort out between you. You do not have to what he wants but equally he doesn't have to agree to what you want.

Thank you.