I need some advice re family court and if a judge would give any weighting to this

[Rapidmama]

I have 3 children by two different men. All of the children are currently on the same contact schedule.

Week 1 is 2 overnights, Week 2 is 3 overnights, Week 3, is 1 overnight. Week 4 they are home all week bar one overnight. This was the original schedule I have with the two oldest DC's father. When my youngest DC's father left he agreed to go to this schedule as it provided enough time and it meant all the children were home at the same time and go at the same time.

After 4 years he has decided this schedule no longer suits him and he wants to reduce contact to one weekend every other weekend, with no mid week access at all. Also no school holidays because of 'work' (I also work but that doesn't seem to matter). We are going to court to sort this out as I can't agree with it as the schedule he has proposed means the DC will rarely get a weekend home together at all. I've mapped it out in my diary and they will get one weekend together every 6 weeks or so. I don't know if a judge will take that into account at all though or if it's irrelevant?

I'm mostly bumping this for you because I have no direct experience, although I believe they'd take into account contact with siblings. Maybe not enforcing the same schedule, though.

Unfortunately a dad cannot be forced to have contact if he doesn't want it.

Thank you Anchor

Yes @TeachesOfPeaches I didn't think they would try and make him but wondered since he clearly isn't that bothered about seeing her if the judge would agree to making sure that his overnight falls on the weekends they are home and not on a rigid EOW basis.

Looking at the welfare of the children, contact with their half sibling is something the court will want to promote if possible. Obviously he can’t be forced but if it’s an argument about which weekend he has, yes I think the court would give weight to your wish for the half siblings to spend time together.

I used to work in family court and I think they would take it into account if your DC wants to be home with their siblings. Does your DC have an advocate? Cafcass worker or social worker? The judge will certainly consider your DCs wishes if they are presented appropriately. Maybe you could make an alternative suggestion...Maybe one weekend a month and one weeknight stay instead of the other weekend.
If you show you are supportive of contact and being reasonable they will be more helpful.

@Jamhandprints, thank you. Not currently, this is the first time we have been to court as we sorted it out amongst ourselves the first time around and it's never changed. He didn't turn up for mediation.

I've always gone above and beyond to support access. I have a family calendar app both fathers and their partners have access to. They are able to amend weekends whenever they need to and i've very very rarely said no unless I am working or we have plans. I'm not sure how I can get that across to the judge, just trying to work out the best way to do this without it looking like I am blocking contact which I have never done.

The court will certainly take your point in to account. It's impossible to say how persuasive it will be as we don't know all of the other factors, but it's certainly not a frivolous point to make.

In a case such as yours there is highly likely to be no cafcass officer s7 report, and certainly no s37 social worker report (unless there's a suggestion the children are suffering significant harm, and there's no indication of that). The judge will take it as given that the younger child will really want to spend the same time with its older siblings, and that to upset the status quo on the weekends all three are with you should be a significant factor.

So if is likely he can get as little contact as he chooses (my children's father for example does not have the children even one night a year) and the court cannot change or force that but the court might ensure the children can be with you when the other children are home - n other word you will probably end up with the children a lot more with you than now.

Just be very factual, as you have been here, explaining that it would mean only 1 weekend in 6 all together, maybe a calendar to show this. And take an alternative schedule with you that you'd be happy with. Take it all in writing/printed out in case people want to see it.

he has decided this schedule no longer suits him and he wants to reduce contact to one weekend every other weekend

Has he said why? Change of job maybe?

A judge is likely to take it into account but it might not be prioritised above quality time with a parent - so if Dad is only available EOW that may be prioritised above siblings being together. Presumably siblings will see each other in the week - it seems like even on the old schedule they spent a majority of their time at your house?

Not a change of job, a change of partner