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Child Maintenance in climate of toxic masculinity and patriarchy...

49 replies

K8tyW · 29/01/2019 12:46

Sharing my open letter here in the hope it will spark further conversation and support for what I hope to achieve... the letter has been acknowledged by her PA.

Dear Baroness Hale,

I write regarding the Child Maintenance Service and the recognised legal loopholes that enable HNW individuals to financially neglect their children.

I left my ex when our twins were just 5 months and have been supported by Womens Aid and the Police through a challenging climate of emotional abuse ever since; financial control continues and is perpetuated and sanctioned by the CMS. The impact on our children, me, my husband and younger children is excruciating and unacceptable.

Despite his wealth (multiple millions) the Child Maintenance Service assess maintenance obligations based on a declared salary of zero and additional unearned income £32,696. My ex currently pays less then £100 a week for our children and has made it clear I should only expect that to decrease.

I am battling systems that are failing my children and I wonder if there is anything you could do?

Here is a press release I wrote on the sorry situation with the support of leading London Law Firm Vardags;

Mandatory reconsiderations are the gateway to Child Maintenance reviews - an agency working to government KPIs to reject four out of five appeals, which is the final insult to mothers battling a system that legally entitles wealthy absent parents to absolve themselves of financial contributions towards their children.

When the Child Support Agency became the Child Maintenance Agency it ceased to look at assets or wealth outside of salary, therefore, individuals paid via dividends or from international income streams are outside of its jurisdiction. For frustrated mothers the fact that such transparent 'income modification' is legally sanctioned is as distressing as the pressure left on them to cope financially and there is a recognised need for change.

Leading London law firm Vardags note that;

‘The CMS is a blunt instrument, at best difficult to navigate, at worst, impenetrable. Five different pieces of dense legislation and regulations set out the pathway to child maintenance, administrated by a computerised system, which does not adapt to nuanced personal circumstances.

In this global age where “super earners” are increasingly ingenious in the ways in which they manage their finances and hold their assets, the CMS offers a woefully unsophisticated system that continues to fail the most vulnerable, leaving a significant band of children penalised due to the disparity of wealth between their parents. These are not parents who are impoverished, quite the opposite. These are parents who are able to arrange their wealth to fall outside of the unyielding CMS criteria, circumventing their responsibilities to their children. Some non-resident parents are manipulating the system by setting up business structures and income streams to defeat the stringent rules, because they are armed with the best legal advice money can buy and use the system’s inherent rigidity to their advantage. I believe that such action is morally reprehensible and needs to be met with a strong and easily accessible system that seeks to protect the child rather than the current series of loopholes available to the financially dominant party.

The decision to end the CMS’s ability to look behind the UK tax returns and to consider the global lifestyle of the paying parent has shut down the only avenue of attack which can be easily demonstrated and views a parent’s financial circumstances more broadly. Unless the paying parent earns an income in excess of £156,000, which leads to a maximum assessment by the CMS, the courts have no jurisdiction to intervene and take account of the wider picture of wealth. This is an area of law crying out for change; the system is being manipulated and, in many cases, is failing to protect those children it was set up to help.’

vardags.com/

Essentially mothers battling the system for child support from wealthy fathers who fund their lifestyles outside of salary are being told that their battle is with the moral fibre of their ex and not their exes finances.

Mothers questing for justice are at the mercy of UK law and things have gone from bad to worse since the Dickson V Rennie case led to Judges not applying Schedule 1 of the Children's Act until a tribunal hearing via the CMA has been reached and won; seemingly impossible to do when the CMA don't look at wealth outside of salary. In any case evidencing wealth to get to tribunal stage (either on or off salary) requires documents and financial data that would breach the wealthy parent's privacy.

The CMA and Schedule 1 of the Children's Act were intended to protect children yet wealth disparity and neglectful intent has left both wide open to corruption meaning these laws and institutions now serve the wealthy to allow legal abandonment of children.

Justice Holman, the Judge in the Dickson V Rennie case, called a mother’s plight to get proportionate financial support for her children via the law a ‘folly’.

I understand the law is changed either by case precedent or legislation; having asked my MP (Michelle Donelan) to put the recognised need for change to the House of Lords she was told that their would be no review as the current set up was deemed acceptable. Clearly the financial disparity between my ex and I and indeed all women in my position means we are not in a position to trail blaze change in a court room.

I just refuse to accept that this is the end - particularly in the current climate where increasingly toxic masculinity and patriarchy is being called out; surely when these two combine at the head of our legal system to disadvantage mothers and children now is the time for this situation to be put under the spotlight of morality and decency and changed?

I would welcome the opportunity to discuss this in more detail.

With kind regards,

[redacted]

This post was edited by MNHQ

OP posts:
MissedTheBoatAgain · 30/01/2019 07:32

cohabitation is on the rise and the law needs to adapt and cater for children born out of wedlock

Why does the Law need to be changed because moral standards have dropped?

In today's World many mothers work to support their families. Even when my parents married in the 1960's they both worked. No choice - they needed the money.

My next door neighbour was back at work 6 weeks after the birth of her second child. No choice - the family needed the money.

I don't buy the argument that the husband became rich because the wife stayed at home to look after children. If the husband was rich he could afford to send the Children to boarding school while the wife developed her own career.

marriage is considered more of a financial commitment than having children

Marriage is optional (excluding religions that have arranged marriages). Having children is also optional (excluding rape).

Collaborate · 30/01/2019 07:36

@K8tyW There has long been agitation from the legal profession for the law to change in this area. Unfortunately the right wing fundamentalists, supported by the Daily Mail and other tabloids, have always pretended this is an assault on the sanctity of marriage.

Collaborate · 30/01/2019 07:37

Why does the Law need to be changed because moral standards have dropped?

I think it is appalling that you equate a decision not to get married to a lack of morality. Give your moral compass a shake.

RolandDeschainsGilly · 30/01/2019 07:40

I get 0 for my toddler.

Because my ex works for 6 weeks, then goes on the dole for a few weeks, then gets another job for 6 weeks, rinse and repeat. By the time HMRC have told CMS where he is, he’s already gone and they can’t do a Deduction from Earnings, they have several Liability Orders, bailiffs haven’t managed to get anything, and whenever CMS started up criminal proceedings they had to stop as he signed back on the dole and they aren’t allowed to prosecute him “when he has no means to pay” Hmm Angry

Collaborate · 30/01/2019 07:59

@RolandDeschainsGilly That is appalling.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 30/01/2019 09:18

I think it is appalling that you equate a decision not to get married to a lack of morality

Children borne out of wedlock was the point as OP seems to be suggesting that settlements and worse and children when fair worse when parents cohabit as opposed to marry?

Collaborate · 30/01/2019 10:29

Why do you think that a child born out of wedlock demonstrates a decline in moral standards? Have you arrived here from Victorian times in a time machine?

RolandDeschainsGilly · 30/01/2019 11:39

I was married. Still haven’t got any child support.

I wasn’t married to the father of my elder DC and yet he pays on time in full every month, plus extras, sees DC regularly and we coparent very well.

My ex husband does none of that.

greenberet · 04/02/2019 13:22

@K8tyW - I have experienced this - where can I add my support

K8tyW · 04/02/2019 13:28

@greenberet sorry to hear you have also experienced this, I have made the open letter public on FB so if you search it may come up there? Have to say I’ve begun to dread the notifications from MumsNet re this thread, never in a million years did I imagine that, in seeking support for a change recognised as needed by leading lawyers, that mothers would attack my morality and generally be so hyper critical and quick to attack! X

OP posts:
greenberet · 04/02/2019 21:51

@K8tyW Unfortunately some of the posters on this thread have their own agenda and are of the opposite sex - I have banged heads with them many a time - others just don’t get it unless they have experienced it themselves - to realise you have been financially abused by the father of your kids takes some getting round - to then find a system put in place to protect the kids actually prolongs the abuse - leaves you in despair - bordering on suicidal - I have the times and dates of the phone calls I made - I was being taken all the way to court hearing - even the CMS worker said he can clearly afford to pay

Thank you for sharing this - there are a few of us fighting battles trying to change a system/ justice that leaves mothers shafted!

MissedTheBoatAgain · 05/02/2019 02:13

even the CMS worker said he can clearly afford to pay

Pay what exactly?

there are a few of us fighting battles trying to change a system/ justice that leaves mothers shafted!

Not convinced that all mothers get shafted.

greenberet · 05/02/2019 12:56

HIS £5k arrears

Not all mothers no - but one is too many and there are plenty more than one -

anyone having to deal with CMS and yes that can include you too Missed - do you feel shafted? - you definitely feel something but not sure what

MissedTheBoatAgain · 06/02/2019 09:11

£5K arrears is a lot. What happened to the enforcement procedures?

In my CMS have produced 4 different figures in 12 months! I was notified in December last year that Ex has initiated an appeal, but heard nothing since?

Collaborate · 06/02/2019 10:37

What happened to the enforcement procedures?

Enforcement is always problematic in CMS cases. The default/go-to-first option is deductions from earnings. Completely useless with someone self employed, but CMS can do this on their own without going to court. CMS can also take the money straight from a defaulter's bank account. However if they don't know where the accounts are or what is in them that is not helpful.

If that doesn't work they can get a liability order in the magistrates court. This enables the debt to be enforced by use of bailiffs, or charging order. Unfortunately some of the reluctant payers will hide their income well enough and their assets well enough that this is not an option for many.

If that fails CMS can apply to court to take someone's driving licence from them or imprison them, but the latter certainly requires strong proof of an ability to pay.

The crux of the problem here is that the initial leg work is seldom done. There is no bespoke investigation in to the circumstances of someone self employed, for example, in which the court investigates claims of poverty and can make findings adverse to the payer and which can be used against him/her on an enforcement application. When investigations do occur the tribunal that deals with them plays no part in enforcement. Seldom are the Child Support Appeal Tribunals ever engaged, and the procedure is cumbersome and designed so that the parties are expected to come without representation to face a 3 person panel consisting of an accountant, a lawyer and a lay person. It's not a bad system, but the courts generally do it better.

Also, a recipient is left with no control. They cannot initiate action, and have to hope that the CMS caseworker does what they want when they want. I find this doesn't happen anywhere near enough.

greenberet · 06/02/2019 12:21

X Was taking it to tribunal - they are totally separate as collaborate has said just reading re panel consisting of accountant - maybe it was never x’s Intention to get this far as he cancelled a week before. He used court to threaten me during divorce knew how emotional I become under stress which means I cannot think straight - was probably doing the same here - accountant would seen through his bullshit CMS had already identified him trying to get one over on them by him claiming he misunderstood what he needed to send re tax return. HEs a leading professional in financial services ffs - deals with tax returns all day long.

As much as going to court is extremely traumatic for me I wanted this tribunal as they have the powers to order arrears be paid in lump sum. I’m not sure if someone screwed up here but a letter I sent to courts got sent back to me as evidence so I’m assuming they sent this to x as well.

As he is now paying off the arrears although minimal due to his claims of unaffordability there is nothing CMS can do.

They do not understand the impact this has on me and ultimately my kids- the abuse continues as a result of their incompetence.

Collaborate with your knowledge it’s people like me that need someone like you fighting our corner - I paid out £93k in legal fees - I got screwed I can now prove everything I said during my divorce - I’ve got a barrister falsely producing a client care letter, I’ve got a surveyor who was supposed to be acting for me but Is under conflict of interest and my judge - well she doesn’t get mental health for a start doesnt seem to believe medical professionals and I don’t believe read my case - I’ve come across a judge’s blog who admits that sometimes due to time pressure they aren’t able to - so faced with a barrister From her old chambers and me being on my own due to no fault of my own - I didnt stand a chance - I could have done absolutely nothing - no solicitor, no barrister no paperwork defending myself and doubt I could have come off any worse!

Collaborate · 06/02/2019 13:29

I wanted this tribunal as they have the powers to order arrears be paid in lump sum. That's not what the tribunal is there to do. It is there to decide what the facts are, so income, really. It then instructs CMS to use the figures it has determined, and it remains the function of the CMS to decide how to enforce.

a letter I sent to courts got sent back to me as evidence so I’m assuming they sent this to x as well. You must expect that anything you send to court will be seen by the other party.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 07/02/2019 01:40

Seldom are the Child Support Appeal Tribunals ever engaged, and the procedure is cumbersome and designed so that the parties are expected to come without representation to face a 3 person panel consisting of an accountant, a lawyer and a lay person

Do both parties have to attend the Tribunal? Could my accountant go in my place?

I have not seen the appeal papers yet even though notified over 2 months ago that appeal had been lodged. Advice from the appeals team was that Ex has most likely challenged the CMS calculation or does not believe the figures on the Tax Return.

CMS calculation seems to be the nearest penny as per the online calculator. Variations for unearned income and that shared care is less than 52 nights per year have already been dealt with. So my best guess is that Ex does not believe the Tax Returns.

If an accountant is on the panel and I was asked questions about the Tax Return I would not know what to say. Hence my question whether my accountant could go in my place?

Collaborate · 07/02/2019 07:38

The first tribunal hearing is really only to consider directions. You would need to turn up and say that you are willing to file a statement from your accountant, and invite the tribunal to consider the questions your accountant will need to address. Your accountant can then come to the next (and final) hearing to give evidence, but not in your place. If you fail to turn up you run the risk of findings being made against you, accountant or not.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 07/02/2019 07:45

To Collaborate

Thanks for the information. I did not realize there would be two hearings. To UK from where I work now is 14 hours flight each way! Guess I just have to swallow that and hope I can get time off. Hopefully the tribunal gives enough notice.

Collaborate · 07/02/2019 07:57

Might be worth your while emailing the tribunal in advance to seek consent to you attending the first hearing by phone, setting out the directions you'll be seeking. There is no set process, but any sensible tribunal will see that they cannot determine the application without best evidence.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 07/02/2019 08:31

To Collaborate

Thanks again. There is an 8 hour time zone difference, but would be easier than 14 hours flying each way for what could be a short hearing.

Eve81 · 17/02/2019 00:43

As soon as I saw 'toxic masculinity' and 'patriarchy', i thought here we go..
You're fighting for 'woman' to be given money by men but calling men out on theses things?

Just by stating the difference in gender you have proven that woman are more advantaged in family law.

Your letter sounds whiny and entitled.

Xenia · 17/02/2019 08:23

The poster has had a bit of an unfair hearing on here. It is quite a good letter to Baroness Hale (who is retiring from the Supreme court because she has reached the age limit). She taught me family law at university a long time ago.

As a woman who paid out to a man as i earna lot more the way the law stands certainly means it makes sense for women never to give up work, never to rely on men for money and always try to out earn your husband or live in partner as relying on a spouse or the state to keep you often seems to go wrong.

My children's father doesn't pay anything. i could have gone to court 12 months after the divorce for 25% of his net earnings but it was 25% of not a lot so I didn't bother.

I do support there being a vast difference between marrying someone and not and therefore if you do want to claim money from a spouse later then don't move in until you have a ring on your finger.

Why some men choose not to pay reasonable amounts for their children is beyond me. I have even had them showing off about how little they pay on first dates - how unattractive.

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