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Original poster

Family Court and Social Services

22 replies

youngnanna · 27/01/2019 21:00

Would love to get some advice please. I thought family court proceedings were nearly over, ex and I had agreed possible contact once the contact centre visits were over. Problem is my nine year old son showed bad behaviour at the contact centre when i was with him which led to Cafcass coming out to see me earlier in the week. Son flipped again when Cafcass came out and basically pushed the worker out of the door after saying he wanted her to go. This afternoon I have been told Cafcass are going to do a risk assessment & also a referral to Social Services. Can anyone please advise me what all this means.

OP posts:
MrsBertBibby · 28/01/2019 11:11

Your 9 year old pushed an adult out of your home?

That suggests he is beyond parental control.

Quite right to refer to SS. Why is he like this?

Original poster
youngnanna · 28/01/2019 11:33

Yes, he didn't like her.He was like it with the worker at the contact centre,nearly threw a chair at her.i'm worried as school say he is okay there.i know i should be stronger with him

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SillySallySingsSongs · 28/01/2019 11:36

Nearly throwing chairs at adults and pushing them out of doors it not in anyway ok.

You need you work with SS

Jackshouse · 28/01/2019 11:37

What did you do when he was pushing this adult?

Original poster
youngnanna · 28/01/2019 11:58

I know I need to work with SS, I'm just worried they will take him off me. I didn't let him use his xbox after and told him off

OP posts:
BubblesBuddy · 28/01/2019 15:50

I think they will take parental separation into account! Children can be affected by this. I don’t think he would be removed from your care but I would try and access help from SS. Obviously he cannot behave this way around anyone and it would seem he is angry. Try and get help but you will have to be loving and firm!

Original poster
youngnanna · 28/01/2019 17:36

Thank you so much.I've been split with his dad for three years though.It's so hard being firm with him

OP posts:
titchy · 28/01/2019 18:03

It's so hard being firm with

That's what parenting is all about. In less than a year your son will be of the age of criminal liability - he can be charged with assault and sent to a juvenile detention centre. Once he's a strapping teen you don't have a hope in hell of being able to restrain him - you have to get this under control now.

Seek help - GP, social services, CAHMS. Anything - seriously time is very short.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 28/01/2019 18:07

Sounds like he’s struggling with all the strange adults around deciding where he has to go and when. Presumably he knows it’s to do with his dad? Perhaps he blames them for restricting contact? I would highly recommend play therapy for him OP. SS May be able to arrange this for him at their own cost. Ask them about it.

Original poster
youngnanna · 28/01/2019 20:10

Thank you both.I know I'm too soft on him with his xbox especially,I'm still really worried as he is doing fine at school and always is good for his dad.i just want social services to go away

OP posts:
Jackshouse · 29/01/2019 07:59

Ask SS for a referral to a parenting g program. Parenting is full of doing things that your kids don’t like because it good for them, tooth brushing, healthy food, homework and going to bed at a decent time. Kids like structure and routine it means they feel loved and know where the boundaries are so they feel secure.

Original poster
youngnanna · 31/01/2019 19:49

Thank you. I have to wait to see what the Guardian says for her report for court next week now. Dreading it

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Original poster
youngnanna · 06/02/2019 11:53

Guardian report to court is full of lies. Said she saw me dragging my son off his bed. I did confirm he's been like this before & she's put that in the report too.Judge ordered a Section 37 on him now & I'm going to make a statement saying Cafcass is a liar.Im panicking I'll lose my son now like I did his brother

OP posts:
Doyoumind · 06/02/2019 12:03

Accusing Cafcass of lying is not going to help your situation. You need to work with the system rather than against it.

Original poster
youngnanna · 06/02/2019 18:29

They are lying though.She also referred my son to Social Services without advising me.It's not fair

OP posts:
Original poster
youngnanna · 21/02/2019 19:02

Hi i know i do yet it isnt fair. Ive submitted a statement to court this week now .What chance do you think i have i've asked for a new cafcass officer too

OP posts:
Patchworkpatty · 21/02/2019 22:38

If you are saying that you have had a previous child removed - and this is now happening, I would be extra careful to engage with them and do exactly as they say. I would guess your chances of getting social services to 'just go away' without jumping through every hoop -is pretty slim.

Original poster
youngnanna · 24/02/2019 09:46

Thank you.Son is fine at school and with his dad.ive reported his dad to the police but they've told me I'm wasting their time

OP posts:
skunkatanka · 24/02/2019 10:35

Why did you report his dad to the police OP? On what grounds was your other child removed? I think there's a lot to your story that you aren't sharing and so you're likely to get poor advice from other posters.

Hollowvictory · 24/02/2019 10:37

There's much more of a story here I think. Sorry you've had a child removed already but obviously there are concerns about your son too. Hope life gets better for you in future and that you get the help you need

PotteringAlong · 24/02/2019 10:38

I think you need legal advice here and not advice from a bunch of people on the Internet.

Original poster
youngnanna · 25/02/2019 23:38

I think my sons dad has been saying things to try and get me into trouble and I'm sure I saw him driving around here the other day. I'm worried he might try and take my son. I am getting some legal advice, hsvd applied 4 legal aid

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