Making provisions for children

[disneyspendingmoney]

So I'm a single dad, resident parent, with child arrangement order and prohibited steps order. Due to the behaviour of stbxw, the dcs are on a child protection plan. The SW has indicated that this is likely to end at next conference and the dcs taken off the register. This is because stbxw was removed from the family home by the police.

So far so good.

During recent contact, stbxw upset the dcs (13&11) that because if my mild chest infections I was going to die. To give an indication stbxw has a diagnosed mental health issue which she is not seeking treatment for, a chronic alcoholic and generally very narcissistic. She has also tried to overstep the bounds of the contact order. The dcs generally try to avoid contact now that supervised contact has come to an end as recommended by the SW, who thinks stbxw will be ok in the community.

Prior to me going back to my lawyer.

If I was to die what provision should I look for to protect the dcs.

This is my thinking so far.

Life insurance anything specific I should look for?
Life assurance and savings plan?
Guardianship? How does that work?

I have no family at all (only child of early coldwar asylum seekers naturalised British, both passed).
DC1 has 5 years to go until majority, at that point can dc1 become guardian of dc2.

I will say that I'm quite skint, paying for stbxw rehab & recovery and mental health treatment when we were together took quite the toll, followed up by the ongoing legal fees, now has me treading water rather than sailing off into the sunset.

Any professional advice would be greatly appreciated, before I embark on making instructions?

Make a will putting everything in trust for your children, and make sure you appoint a trustee who you know will do a good job. You can appoint a guardian for your children but that only takes effect when the mother is also dead. If you were to die the mother would have sole parental responsibility, but a third party might be able to apply to the court for a residence order.

So who can be a trustee?

I don't really want to place that as a burden on what few friends I have as none are that close.

So a guardian is relatively immaterial in this case? As, if I was to die right now, the living parent would assume parental rights.

So who can be a trustee?.

Anyone. It's for you to choose someone from the pool of people you know. It's a good idea to speak to them first. If your estate is worth something then a solicitor might agree to be trustee, but they will charge for the privilege.

It's always worthwhile appointing a guardian. I thought your point was that having a mild chest infection doesn't mean that you're about to breathe your last.

I have no intention of breathing my last for minimum of 40 years I want the dcs to be assured that they will have someone to look after them as X did a really good job of winding them up. Both of them have expressed concerns about her capacity to parent, along with social services.

people would often have their sibling or even their parent with a siblng as trustee. As said above you cannot stop the other parent taking teh children if you die in most cases - eg my letter of rishes said the younger children shoudl remain with the older adult chidlren but we all knew their father could over turn that if it came to it - as it stand as they have reached 18 without my dying so not relevant now.

If you are still married now remember if you leave a spouse out of a will they may have a claim - I am not sure how close you are to decree absolute. I paid for my ex husband to make a new will (in favour of our children ) once our divorce was finished.

Hmmm! Thank you all for this info it gives me some solid questions to ask my Lawyer