Didn’t know I was named as executor!!!!

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An elderly friend died a few days ago and I have just found out that myself and my husband are executors of the will. We had no knowledge of this so it has come as a surprise. The lady who died had no children but several nieces and nephews who we have spoken to. There is no property involved and I expect very little money. We are clueless as to what we need to do and what happens regarding the funeral etc. If anyone has any experience or tips I would be very grateful.

That was very rude and presumptuous if her. Being executor of a will can be extremely stressful and time consuming. It’s not really an honour, it’s a hassle to put on someone. So usually you would clear it with them and not just dump it on them.

Hopefully it’s a very simple estate with reasonable people involved.

I don’t think the executor organise funerals. You are responsible for her estate.
You need to apply for probate to “prove” the will.
I would contact a solicitor.
You can step down if you wish but I am not sure what happens then.

Sorry, didn’t give advice. Best advice is DO NOT DO THIS YOURSELVES. Use a solicitor. You can do it yourselves to save money in the estate but it’s a very very bad idea and of zero benefit to you.

You are not required to accept the appointment.

If you don't want to take on the role, you can renounce the executorship so long as you have not "intermeddled" (got involved with sorting out monies basically). Look on the gov.uk website - it's a pretty straightforward process - you can either renounce completely, postpone or appoint an attorney to act on your behalf. Hope that helps.

Thank you all for the replies. I had looked at refusing but feel if it’s what she wanted I should try my best to carry out her wishes. I actually didn’t realise I could just appoint a solicitor to do it and maybe that will be the best course of action - does anyone know how much this would cost? We haven’t seen the will yet as we haven’t got the death certificate but I am presuming funeral arrangements or a plan maybe with the will - is this usually the case? I know she wasn’t being rude I just think she trusted us.

She should have let you know but may she rest in peace - you sound like lovely people

I would speak to her solicitor who wrote the will and go from there

Not a lawyer but any costs should come out of the estate - funeral, lawyer, fees etc.

If there’s very little money to start with how could a funeral be paid for let alone appointing lawyers to administer the estate at a cost of hundreds per hour.

Are the relatives expecting you to fund all this yourselves upfront as it could take many months before you would be refunded from the estate.

Will you be the ones to sort out her possessions, clear and clean her home, contact banks, utility companies etc. All this takes time, and costs with phone calls, trips to the tip, writing letters, and people are going to be moaning about when are they going to get their money and why are you paying for a lawyer, house clearance etc. etc.

I think you should consider very carefully whether to accept being executors and if so discuss with the family exactly what they expect, to prevent misunderstandings.

Do you have access to her paperwork, funerals are surprisingly expensive and it would be worth checking if there is enough to cover it. I would not advise paying it yourself.

If there is a small amount of money in the estate you may not need to apply for probate. Have a look at the HMRC website for more information.

You sound like you have good intentions, but if I were in your situation I would decline and let her nieces and nephews step up.

Have they even shown you the will?

My dad has been named as an executor on a number of occasions for family members on both him and my DM's side. He's started refusing to do it as a) they haven't asked him (just assumed because he's "responsible") and b) it's a massive pain in the arse and you get no thanks for it. Frankly I'd not be accepting the appointment.

I don't understand the notion of appointing someone as executor when either they haven't been spoken to (and agreed) or they are not the only beneficiaries. If you haven't got an interest in the estate it is a huge ask. Why not the beneficiaries or, if they are minors, their parents?

Nobody has seen the will. It is lodged with the solicitor and we can’t see it until we have the death certificate. Good point about the relatives and what they expect. We are going to arrange a meeting and see what comes of that. Really wish this wasn’t happening.

who has told you that you are executors? Surely they'd send you a copy of the will? An executor derives their power from the will, not the grant of probate, so you're entitled to a copy/the original.

sounds strange.

Her nephew called the solicitors who told him we were executors. The will is with the solicitors and we haven’t seen it and neither has her nephew.

If no-one has seen the will, how do you now that you are executors?

The relatives should be getting the death certificates, arranging the funeral etc.

I would renounce this - it is a huge burden and if there is hardly any money, you might be hard pressed to pay the solicitor.

Over to the relatives would be my advice. Sounds hard-hearted, but frankly she will not know what you decide, and it really is a burdensome task for someone who is not a relative.

OK - sorry - you answered my first question while I was typing.

If the solicitor takes it on, presumably he can get paid via legal aid in some way.

You can contact the solicitors and get them to email you a copy of the will. Decide then if you want to go ahead with it. If you don’t I expect the solicitor will ask the beneficiaries to nominate someone.

Being a executor is a big enough deal that I would want to be confident I could undertake it with some competence, not just feel I had to muddle through because she wanted me to. It's absolutely fine to decline the role, OP.

I'm very sorry you've lost your friend .

You do realise that you will be personally liable should any of the beneficiaries later decide to pursue you for any monies real or imagined.

I wouldn't touch it with a barge pole, nor would I feel guilty this is not something you drop on someone without asking.

I would just refuse to do it unless either I or one of my kids was a beneficiary. If she has left it to neices/nephews one of them can do it.

As others have said, separate the two issues - the family can get the death certificate, organise the funeral, and get a copy of the certificate to the solicitor. You can then speak to the solicitor about the will and decide whether to continue or denounce executorship. But be clear, you are not responsible for arranging any funeral.

You dont need to find a solicitor as she already had one, her family need to register her death and arrange the funeral, not everyone has a funeral plan and unless its with the solicitor or she kept meticulous files you may never find it. You won't be liable for any costs, it will come out of her Estate and many banks will release funds for the funeral. I would say you are unable to be executors and let her family deal with the solicitor.

Being an executor is a thankless task, especially if you are not a beneficiary.
It is very rude to make someone your executor without consulting them. I would decline.