Making a will - what if one of us dies & the other remarries?

[MaggieFS]

DH and I have one DS and are making wills. At a simple level, if one dies, the other gets everything. If we both go, DS will when he reaches 25 and will be looked after until then.

However, the bit I'd like some opnions on, is what if one of us dies young and the other remarries and has further children. Ultimately, I would like my DS to be the only beneficiary of any remainder of my estate once DH dies and not have DH's estate bolstered by inheritance from me, to be shared equally amongst future children he may have.

I don't wish to sound mean, and we have discussed this, DH and I are both in agreement - as I am likely to inherit some money from my mum it seems only right this ends up with her grandson. That said, I would like DH to use what he needs to have a happy life with DS and have no issue with him remarrying. (And we would have this set up to work both ways).

My biggest assets are my share of the house (tenants in common) and the potential inheritance. We've said if it helps simplify things then we would really only be concerned about protecting these rather than the entirity of our estates.

We're using a solicitor to do our wills but when I've put this to him, he says he is not an expert in family law or trust law and we should ask a financial advisor. (!?)

So is what I am suggesting impossible/ridiculous? Or do I just need to find a different solicitor (hesiatant as will already owe this one for work done thus far).

Eh? We used a very low cost will writer rather than a solicitor and she drew up a trust to do just this. In fact she suggested it. Your solicitor sounds a bit crap if they can't do this.

You can leave your half of your house to your son, but with a lifetime interest for your husband so he can always live in it (and mirror that in his will for you). And you could update your will after you inherit to leave this to your son too.

A solicitor should be able to advise on this. I’d find one that actually knows about the issues relevant to inheritance law.

You can leave your husband a life interest in some or all of your estate with it then passing to your son. If you did that your husband would not be able to spend the capital but can spend any interest earned by that part of your estate. If your solicitor doesn't know how to do this you need a different solicitor. Or contact mumblechum0 who writes wills and has had many excellent reviews from Mumsnetters.

No not ridiculous and we are at also at this stage, background behind mine is my mum did died and dad remarried, he has now died and currently step mother has everything, she brought nothing financially into the relationship, she now has the family home and all of my darling mums inheritance from her father and dad’s! Apparently her and dad trusted each other to leave the will be when one dies and all children including her 3 would get an equal share, we’ll see but I’m not counting on it! Fortunately my DH understands where I’m coming from that I want to protect mine and his share to ensure it is safe and will go to our children. Watching this thread with interest!

wineymummy step mother and dad had a ‘will or deed of trust’ which splits out estate in equal amounts to all children, can this not be changed now dad has died? I’ve yet to get a solicitor to look over it.

Thanks for the encouraging quick replies. Would a life interest make things hard for DH to sell the house to buy a new one? I don't want to make things unnecessarily difficult.

If it is set up correctly a life interest would not stop your husband selling the house.

No Maggie I'm not sure how it works but we asked this same question and it's fine. I'm not sure exactly how it works but I think my DH could spend any inheritance from me but when he dies my DD would get that amount from his estate (if anything is left?) before it went to any of his other beneficiaries. (I should really understand this more, only had the will written a year ago). I know we did this though as I had to send it to 3 chosen trustees to get them to sign off on it. (2 of DD's uncles and one family friend.)
Bonkers I don't know! Sorry! Your situation sounds a bit shit though I hope you can get it sorted, seems mad that both your DPs are passed away and SM has everything.

I'm surprised that your solicitor didn't suggest a life interest in possession trust, this would get around the problem and it's something which I do very frequently for step families or older people concerned about care home fees.

A life interest trust puts your respective shares in your home into a trust on the first death, to be held for the children's eventual benefit, whilst allowing the survivor to carry on living there until they die or remarriage. There's a portability clause to allow the survivor to move if they want to.

If you want any more info, PM me and I'll send you a link to an article about it. (can't do it here as it's to my own website).

We are looking at setting up a life rent trust at the moment. Can anyone tell me if the (adult) children’s share of the house inherited on the death of the first parent would be counted as a marital asset or if actual ownership of the property would not actually transfer until the death of the second parent?

I am concerned that in the event of one of my children divorcing or dying their spouse would have a claim on the surviving spouses home.

Thanks for the further replies!

Life interest trusts are incredibly common for spouses and it's pretty bread and butter stuff for any qualified solicitor. It sounds either as if you're not using a qualified solicitor, or if you're using someone who doesn't do much in the way of wills. I'd be really worried about using your "solicitor" if they don't know about this simple aspect - what else don't they know?

I was told when we did ours that there is an implication for iht. Which may be why it is more complicated in your case and your solicitor has advised a financial advisor op? Can’t remember the details though sorry