Ex has to have drug/alcohol tests. Advice needed!

[JoJo2106]

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Ex has to have drug/alcohol tests. Advice needed.1
Today 23:02 JoJo2106

Hey!

Need a bit of advice here cos I am well and truly pissed off.

My ex and I have been going through the family court since June. He currently has no contact with DS (age 1) and hasn't since April due to him trying to run off with him and then assaulting me. I ended the relationship when ds was only 2 weeks old as I was very unhappy for a long time and he drank every single day of our relationship which i completely hated. Final straw was him driving with ds in car early hours of the morning after drinking all night so i ended it. He also had a 25 year cannabis habit.

Anyways the court has ordered he has to have drug and alcohol tests done. I know he's stopped cannabis because I told him even before we went to court I'd get him drug tested which was stupid of me cos I've basically gave him the chance to stop but I know he'll go back to it once court is over. So drug tests will prob be a waste of time. But the alcohol is my main issue if I'm honest.

The thing that's pissed me off the most is these alcohol tests were first mentioned in court in June. Mentioned but not ordered at that point. Then we went back to court in August for another hearing and then the tests were ordered, bearing in mind he'd already had since June to cut down. Then fast forward to October the tests still aren't done. They have been purposefully delayed by him and his solicitor. He is clearly attempting to cut down so it shows a better reading but it'll be bullshit. I know him and I know how much he drinks and these tests will not be a true picture of his drinking. We were back at court last week and the court did ask why they haven't been done yet and have said they are to be done asap.

I have to pay for half of these tests which is a few hundred pounds. I am livid that he has basically been given the heads up in June that tgese tests were going to be done. They may aswell have said to him u are going to be tested so get yourself home and cut down. If these tests were done in June when they were first mentioned and going back 6 months, that would show a true reading.

What I would like to ask people though is how do I approach this when we are next at court because he had had since June to cut down and he has also delayed the tests for 2 months after they were ordered. I am worried that the court are going to praise him for cutting down and even my solicitor said that may happen angry but it is total bullshit. Once this is all over he will go straight back to how He's been for years and years. He is simply doing this to get access again.

Need to know how to broach this subject with the court because it will not be a truthful result. Can I use the fact he's delayed the test and the fact that he's had since June to cut down in my favour.

End of the day it's a safeguarding issue so it's very important to me and I am so pissed off these tests have taken months to happen!

Surely at court you'll be submitting a position statement? I'd raise your concerns in a non-emotional manner that you're concerned about the delays to the D/A testing procedures and let the Judge do the rest. If Judge has already sought explanations as to why there have been delays, he/she will not tolerate further delays regarding this. I wouldn't put what you think in your statement in that hes avoiding his testing. They can take some time particularly if hair strand testing . Assuming your exp has made an application for contact?

I know several young people who need to regularly test for cannibis (employed in the oil and gas sector) and they know how to pass the test despite smoking regularly on their days off.

Sorry to the 2 previous posters I have only seen these comments now.

I am really looking for advice now on what to do next tbh. We are back at court in less than 3 weeks and these tests still aren't done. In the last court order from October the court had said the tests were to be done ASAP & the results filed to the court no later than the 16th November which is a few days before our next hearing. It's highly unlikely this is going to happen as the tests still aren't done let alone waiting for the results. These tests were first ordered in August and still waiting.

I would like to write a position statement for our next hearing but don't want it to sound too emotional because my anger about this will take over. Anyone have any tips of how I should word it? Also what will the court likely do about this in regards to him getting contact do you think? We are supposed to be back this month to see about a third party supervising contact for a few weeks as our local contact centre is closed. Then I think after this he is allowed to have ds (aged 1) on his own. I am not comfortable at all about this with no tests been done. Can I push for no contact at the moment because he has delayed this testing since August?

So very angry and frustrated. These tests were first mentioned in June but ordered in August, It is now November so it's obvious he has delayed and delayed to try and show a better reading as hes had months to cut down. But it won't be a true reading of how much he does actually drink normally. So frustrating

The court also said at the August hearing not to post stuff on social media as he had been posting stuff. And he has started again.