Had enough now... harassment/non mol order

[xx13jeaxx]

For the past 12 months we’ve been dealing with harassment from my NC mother in the form of her shouting abuse at us in the street, social media posts, reporting us to SS, calling the police accusing DH of abusing me, following us into shops to try and speak to DS. Today we found out my mother has tried to call DS school to speak with the head teacher on a number of occasions and to top it off my mother was seen today stood outside the school trying to talk to DS in the playground. DS is 4 years old and very distressed about everything. We log every incident with 101. Police aren’t interested. We’ve spoken to a solicitor and we are looking at around £5000 for a non mol. I don’t know what to do or where to go. I’ve had enough of everything this woman is doing. We want to move towns so she can’t find us but can’t afford too. Any advice I would appreciate?!

I would call 999 instead if you feel she is putting any of you at risk, Can you apply for legal aid for this, their helpline will advise you and help you find a solicitor.

Have you spoke to school about it ? That alone should be a safeguarding issue.

On one occasion she was stood outside our house shouting abuse, recorded it and called 999... no officer was available and all they did was make an appointment for us to go to the station. We’ve already spoken to a solicitor.

Yes school are fully aware of what happened. Lunch time supervisors informed head teacher straight away, and they’ve followed protocol and reported it themselves too.

Just had a quick look about legal aid. I will make some phone calls tomorrow.

I got a non mol without legal aid.
I done it myself against an ex partner - think the application cost £70 when I done it.
I done it ex-parte I think it was called; without notice anyway - was really simple. Required a day of sitting in court from 9am but was simple enough. Just needed all my evidence of police logs, school records etc x

Do you film the abuse, get all the evidence.

What happened when you went to the police station for the appointment?

National centre of domestic violence can arrange injunctions for you. You can self refer on their website. Report your mother for harassment police. I don't see how they can do nothing. It's a course of conduct which is causing distress/alarm. That's the definition of harassment...they are duty bound to investigate all allegations. Call 101 to report or yes 999 if you feel in immediate fear or danger.

I say a domestic as that's what it will be as it's two related people.

@HoleyCoMoley we only have one video and two lots of photos (her swearing at us in the streets) apparently it’s not enough evidence for the police.

@MrsGarethSouthgate nothing happened. Showed them the video, all they said was it’s not enough evidence and nothing more they can do and advised us to apply for a non mol.

The harassment only started because she doesn’t like DH, and it’s since got worse as I went NC 4 months ago. We live in the same town, very small town with only one school, one doctors, one supermarket so it’s a difficult situation because we can’t get away from her. I wish we could win the lottery and move away and start fresh... if only life was that easy though.

999 is emergency calls only. Please don't advise it's misuse. However, if you can get the community support officers to call at your mother's and to explain harassment to her and it's consequences then hopefully she will soon leave you alone. Long term you may find moving to work better so you don't unwittingly bump into her.

@RedHelenB we’ve been advised by police to call 999 if she is been abusive and threatening. Which is what we had to do. More than one police officers have called her or been to see her but she still continues. It’s been over 12 months now of this behaviour from her. She even tried to call my DS’s school asking to speak to the head. She will call the GP with concerns, constantly reporting us to SS. Today she posted on Facebook telling people DH is abusing me, and posted fake messages pretending to be me messaging her. In an ideal world moving away would be ideal, but we don’t have the funds to move unfortunately.

I got a non mol against my husband. I got the paperwork off of the gov.uk website, submitted it with my evidence, in his case, whattsap messages and calls and was in court two weeks later. Cost me nothing apart from the recorded delivery.

I believe it may be harder to get a non mol against someone that isn’t family or an ex. Majority of the abuse & harassment is towards my partner not me. We’ve been told if it was all towards me it would be so much easier to get a non mol.. plus we need evidence which we don’t have enough for anyone to do anything it seems.