Occupation order to get back into the house with my children

[Stacie27]

Hi I was wondrering if anyone had any advise. Me and my ex split around 2 months ago. It's his mortgage as his parents put the money down although we all moved in together (myself,ex, 2 children from previous relationship and our daughter) I was paying toward the bills and mortgage every month. When we split I refused to leave until I found somewhere suitable for me and my kids. It was a crappy few weeks after that, but my ex ended up spending more time at his mum's which frustrated me, as he wouldn't help with his daughter. In anger I sed I wasn't going to help with the bills (silly I know) me and my kids went on a pre planned holiday the week after. When we got back he had changed the locks. Fast forward a month later after a lot of sofa surfing and me and my kids living apart. I find out about occupation orders. I have filled out the application and witness statement and we have a 10 min hearing on tue for my ex to give his evidence (I think) I'll add that I'm representing myself as I can't afford a solicitor, his mum is paying for a solicitor for him. I am only asking for the order to be made for about 8 weeks as we have a house lined up. I have sent nasty messages in sheer frustration of seeing our 2 year old sleeping on a sofa. But also tried reasoning with him aswell with no luck. I have since found out he has met a girl 2 weeks ago and that's mainly why he won't let us back. Because he doesn't want to ruin his 2 week relationship. Me and 2 of my children are on sofas while my other daughter is at a friend's and I only see at weekends. I work night's (on holiday atvghe moment) and my parents are up very early for work 4am. My youngest daughter who is 2 isn't settling because of the moving around and not being in a bed, plus I'm worried when I do go back to work she won't settle at all until I get back at 1am. I am applying as I think it's in the best interests of my children, especially my 2 years old to be back in the home they know until our new home is ready. I'm worried I'm going to lose because of the nasty texts I have sent, even though it was in frustration. .....any advise would be great. Thank you

Are you married?

No we aren't married. We were together 4 years and have a 2 year old together. I have applied for the occupation order on the basis that we have a child and I was cohabiting with my ex partner.

I dont want to be the bearer of bad news but your options are very limited since you are not married your name not on the deeds. And the 2 children that are not his is not his problem with housing.

I am not saying you wont get a order you might but do not pin your hopes on obtaining one.

Thanks for your advise. I know I have a case, as I seen the judge and he has red through my witnesses statement and accepted the papers and set a court date for this Tuesday. I am just worried because of the nasty texts I sent to him even though they were in frustration

I don’t see how it is your house. It is his house

Would you not be better off presenting as homeless OP? I know what they'll give you will be shit (been there) but at least you'll all be together and it's only for 8 weeks? I think you'll be hard pressed to win, especially with no solicitor

It is his house, but we moved in as a family and I helped towards all the bills including the mortgage. It was our home as a family, and I am only asking for us to stay for 8 weeks max and I'd continue to help towards the bills while we are there. His 2 year old daughter is sleeping on a sofa, I shouldn't have to fight her dad to put her back into her own bed in the home that she knows. He's not even offered to help with her at all.

I have been through them channels, they want to send us an hour away. I wouldn't be able to work if we went there as i work evenings I'd be driving to and from our home town for school and work 6 times a day. It wouldn't be affordable. I was wanting to take extra shifts now to make more money for things for my new house. I have spoke to a solicitor today who has dealt with occupation orders a lot, she says I have a strong case. As the welfare of the kids is most important and it's only for 8 weeks.

Just a question as I have no knowledge of this kind of law . Have you approached the cms because he doesn’t get a choice whether to help 2 year old

Sorry I don't understand your question?

He should pay some child support to his daughter. it is your main legal right as you didn't buy the house.

Don't assume you are likely to win the occupation order but he should be paying some money towards his child (but probably not your two children from your previous relationshp - does their father pay you?)

2 year olds don't tend t mind where they sleep so I woudl not worry about the sofa sleeping for 2 months and it sounds like you have accommodation lined up for after that so hopefullhy it will all work out okay. Next time perhaps buy a property in your own name and out earn your man and he will be the one having to leave.

Oh yes I will not be making that mistake again. But to be fair I didn't really have much choice, we were in my rented accommodation before this house and i got given my notice (they wanted to sell) then his mum said about they money she had for him to buy. We were struggling to find another rented so that seemed the best option at the time. Although I felt uneasy from the start. Wish I'd have listen to my gut lol. Yes my other 2 kids dad pays for them. 2 year olds dad doesn't, but he has also started court action for access to her. I am going to try for the order and at least I can say I tried for what I think is best for them.

How did you get on in court Stacie?

As I thought, we go back in 2 weeks as he needs time to do a witness statement. He is claiming that I'm only doing this because he has a girlfriend even tho I started this before hand. The judge did say to his solicitor if that's what he's claiming he needs proof to which he has non

Any update Stacie? Interested because I have an acquaintance in similar situation - thanks