Offsetting pension in divorce settlement

[Isitme13]

I am going through mediation. It has been lengthy, with delays at every possible moment, and trying to get financial clarity has been painful to say the least. I am a sahm, and exH is a very high earner.

In an effort to try to get even close to an agreement, I have proposed that I keep the house (mortgage free) and exH keeps all of his (cash, not final salary) pension. In general terms now, this is roughly equitable, with a slight balance towards me (plus 3 dc, all disabled, one severely so and dependent for life).

ExH is refusing this proposal because it apparently leaves him wide open for me, at some unspecified point in the future, having sold the house and frittered away the proceeds, to attempt to grab part of his pension as well. He is adamant that there is provision in law for this to happen.

My viewpoint (and that of the mediator) is that, if everything is actually on the table to begin with, and an agreement is made, that settlement is final.

Does he have a point? Apart from his general mistrust of me (not at all justified, I am not at all likely to do as he outlines), is this a valid reason for him to be refusing to engage with attempting a settlement?

No he doesn't. The consent order will dismiss all financial claims. That stops you from making any new claims against him. The financial settlement can only be re-opened in very limited circumstances, e.g. when one of the parties has failed to make a full disclosure. You certainly would not be able to claim against his pension just because you have run out of money.

Thanks, prh47bridge, that’s as I suspected.

He is completely stuck on this, and pointed out at great length how his lawyer had specifically advised him not to settle in this way (to me, it is the most obvious way, as it is far less disruptive for the dc), because of this apparent drawback. He claims there are cases being pursued currently which are seeking to do exactly this.

The mediator pointed out that there are absolutely claims going through relating back to pre-pension sharing orders, but that if full disclosure was made, and an agreement reached, then all well.