Hi, new to this but needed some advice. Bit of background.. me and my ex split when I was around 6 weeks pregnant as he told me to consider 'getting rid' of the baby. This wasn't what I wanted and we split up, a few weeks later he wanted to come back but due to a number of reasons (related to the how relationship was) I have said i dont want to take him back, initially he said he would do anything to get me back and prove he wanted to be there for his child.. this didnt last long and quickly went sour as he wanted things his way and I said no I didn't want to be in a relationship with him but I would never stop him being a father.. fast forward to being 34 weeks pregnant and we have barely any contact. I have been in and out of hospitals with complications but he hasnt been around, he's been to the scans (12wk, 20wk, 34wk) but nothing more. We generally don't speak unless its solely about the baby which isn't very often.
So this is where I need advice..
Hes messaged me about his Pat leave wanting to stay over at my house for the 2 weeks he is off as his mum lives an hours drive away and around 2 hours on public transport.. I have said no there's no reason for him to stay overnight but he can come as early and stay as late as public transport allows him to (he said he was learning to drive for babys arrival but never did) he thinks this is unreasonable and has resorted to calling me vile names most of the day because I've moved to a 'rubbish place' and transport would mean he wouldn't get a lot of time (which isnt the case, it would take him 2 hours to get here and then 2 back.. which would have been the same if i stayed where we both lived together or he can have a lift from his parents or i suggested a nearby hotel). He has been telling me that he should be there the whole time for his pat leave including overnight and he will be getting legal advice. My question is.. am I being unreasonable by saying that i dont want him to stay overnight and can i legally say this? I don't feel comfortable having him around through the night and dont feel that its necessary hes there overnight when I have said he can come all day and night if he wishes I just don't want him to stay over as he's emotionally abusive towards me trying to manipulate me. He has never lived in this house and it's not normal for me to have him around, after everything that he's put me through I would prefer for him to have as little time as possible but I am fully aware he is her father and he has every right to be a part of her life. He hasnt been involved since he left at 6 weeks except from coming to the scan appointments, I believe I have been more than reasonable by saying he's welcome to come as much as he likes on his pat leave but I don't want him to stay overnight. I just want to know if legally I have to allow him to stay for his pat leave and if he was to take me to court I would look like I was being unreasonable?