*Sensitive* could this be considered a crime?

[squeakymouse]

Parent of small child repeatedly puts their hand under bottom of child to 'surprise' them whenver they go to sit down on the sofa next to them.

Goes on for a period of years until child is around 9/10.

Always passed off as a funny joke. A kind of grope of the bottom as child sits down.

Done to one child in the family only.

I only have one sibling Aprilshowers and he did way worst things to me than my Dad did (another reason I’m nc with my parents who apparently ‘didn’t notice’)

Sounds like you have had a very tough time. Why not see a solicitor for some peace of mind?
If your dps had a letter of caution reminding them a lot could come out in court should they persue contact maybe they wouldn't take it further?

How regular was contact with your children before you went NC?
It will be up to them to prove a lack of relationship is detrimental to the children.

For piece of mind I think you should see a solicitor and talk all of this through.

They live 200 miles away so contact was regular but intermittent if that makes sense. Certainly no routine of child caring or anything like that. They haven't seen the DC for 20 months.

I think them seeing your DC is remote. I would report the touching and log with police -they may or may not do anything. It sounds sexual, sounds weird and sounds unhinged / abuse. I'd report and log it -even the police can't take it forward.

If they then apply to see DC -I think you'd have a strong case with CAFCASS as to why contact should not go ahead.

Yeah I don't see them being ing awarded contact in that case. You should speak to a solicitor anyways . What prompted this worry? Have they been making threats?

Thank you all.

They haven't made threats but there's still repeated things through the post for the children. 11 items in 10 months. They've been asked not to send and it still comes.

I can return parcels at the door but when it's letters the DC sometimes get to them first. They are not of ages to understand any of the abusive stuff although I've explained as best I can that they aren't seeing us as they haven't been nice to Mummy.

In my mother's head there appears to be a relationship there still - she's just cut me out of the equation completely and acts like it's just her and her gc and I...I guess I don't exist to her?

It's very strange. I just don't know what they'll do next.

Can you get one of those boxes with a lock for the mail? Only you get the key and bin everything. Don't ask them not to send anything either anymore. Just bin and ignore. Stuff for the kids it's just manipulative bs. ATM I have two friends that got "care" packages over the summer holidays, the parents probably thinking they won't be able to just chuck them out with the kids around (especially when filled with toys and treats and ofc in the middle of it all the "I don't know what i did" letter).

Tell dc they aren't appropriate people to have in their lives, and as their dm you get to decide that on their behalf. I am nc with my dm and she has nc with my dc either. She did once try to contact dd via a friend's address, left her a vm advising I would seek legal advice if she continued . Never heard from her again. Neither did dd.

OP

This might be completely unrealistic op but can you move? (And not tell your parents where you have moved to?)

Thank you, no we can't move. We'll look at buying a mailbox.

I've got a better solution. Have a record of telling them not to contact you -text, email, whatever. If they send anything more -go to the police and say that you have asked them not to send anything and report harassment. Done.

I would go to see the police and say all of what has happened. They will investigate. Honestly, the law is there to protect you.

Thank you bertie I have a clear record by email, sent almost a year ago.

We have considered reporting them for harassment but it does feel like stirring the pot.

They don’t have rights and can’t get access to your children so don’t worry about that. If you feel it was wrong and other things add up and make it worse then it must be abuse. If you don’t want to go to the police that’s ok just ignore all attempts of contact and if things escalate maybe report them for harrasment. I’ve no experience so I’m not sure what steps to take.

Well i guess I was wrong but in LOUISIANA, any unwanted touching or contact is battery, a crime, and even the FEAR of battery is a crime, assault. May have a sexual crime aspect as well.