Mortgage, money, marriage, Wills - how to protect my assets

[BG2015]

I’m 48, partner 52. He has a 1 teenager and I have 2 teenagers (1 adult)

We’ve been together just over 3 years and living together for 2 years.

He doesn’t own a property but has investments/money in the bank.

I own my house, worth approx £200k with £94k left on the mortgage. My will leaves everything to my children.

He isn’t on any of the bills except council tax but gives me money every month towards household bills and buys extra bits, does jobs, decorating etc.

We’ve talked about getting married but the whole legal side of things makes things very complicated and although ‘love conquers all’ after a failed marriage and then a failed 6 year relationship where I lost about £30k in order to move and get rid of a money grabbing ex - I know love doesn’t always work out how we expect it too.

So does marriage trump everything legally? Or can I instruct my solicitor to do x, y, z?

I love the man to bits but I’ve only known him 2 minutes in the grand scheme of things and it seems he has everything to gain and I have everything to lose were we to marry and then split.

Sorry for the long post

If you marry, your house and his investments will become assets of the marriage to be divided between you if the marriage subsequently fails. If it turns out to be a short marriage the sources of the assets will be taken into account in determining the settlement. In a long marriage the sources of the assets become less important.

You could enter a pre-nuptial agreement to protect your assets if you feel this is necessary. This would not be binding on the courts but they would follow it unless your partner could show that the outcome was clearly unfair.

You mention wills in your title but not in your post. Marriage will invalidate any existing wills. However, you don't have to leave anything to your husband or his child in your will assuming you are in England or Wales. Provided they are not financially dependent on you a challenge to your will would be unlikely to succeed. Unless you choose to change the ownership of the house, any equity in the house will form part of your estate, not his.

Thanks for your reply.

So if we were to marry can I still divide my estate up through leaving a will as long as the house remains solely in my name?

Yes, you can. To avoid problems it may be best to at least give him a life interest in the house in your will so that he can continue living there if you die first. What happens to the house when he dies would then be governed by your will.

If they married how would the whole house still belong to the op to will to her DC?? Would it not be 50% of all the assets would be the op's to will to her DC which could be a greater or lesser value than her house as it stands now?

My other question is how on earth do I decide what proportion I’d will to him. If he starts contributing directly to all bills equally then from that point on he’s entitled to something.

I have 17 years left on my mortgage. My children currently will get 50% each. He would also be entitled to part of my teachers pension if I died I think.

It’s so complicated.

If they married how would the whole house still belong to the op to will to her DC

Marriage does not alter the ownership of the house. It will still belong to the OP. If the OP subsequently divorces the house will be an asset of the marriage to be split between her and her partner even though it belongs solely to her. If she dies whilst still married the house will be hers to do with as she wants. However, if she does not make adequate provision for her partner in her will he may have a claim against her estate under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependents) Act 1975 if the OP so the OP will need to take proper advice when writing her will to minimise the chances of him making a successful claim.

My other question is how on earth do I decide what proportion I’d will to him

I suggest you seek professional advice.