Car accident nightmare

[Lovedlost]

I was in a long queue of traffic. 5mph maximum - just crawling. My suspension collapsed - cue loads of flashing lights on dashboard. My attention was obviously affected for a moment. Noticed that the car in front had stopped. Slammed on brakes, and just hit it. Clearly not hard. My DDs were in the back - didn't notice a bump, just felt me brake hard.
I pulled over and spoke to the lovely old lady who I had hit. My car is much larger, and took the most impact. The suspension had pulled the bumper down, so it looked bad. Her car had a very tiny amount of damage. The plate that attaches under the rear bumper had a couple of bolts missing, so was slightly hanging down. Nothing else evident, other than a few minor scratches that appeared to be preexisting due to paint colour. My car is very dark - her car was red. Scratches seemed pale blue.
I spoke to her, and she was quite shocked (as was I). She told me she was off on a long journey, and would have to call her DH to get her car to a garage. We exchanged details. She returned to her vehicle.
I limped the DDs to school, then limped to local garage. The pump had gone, plus front tyres damaged by suspension drop. £1500 bill. Not able to claim on insurance, as it was a 'wear and tear' issue - irrelevant to incident.
I had to drive past incident site to go to garage. Her car had gone (in 5 minutes), so she had driven to her destination.
Later that day, I called her to check if she was OK. Her DH was mystified. She had gone to the coast for a few days and he had no knowledge of the incident. The coast is as far as you get from our area. I was relieved.

Until her DH called me to advise that the car needs a new bumper. £500+
There was genuinely not a mark on it.
I drive a 4x4. My bumper took all of the impact. Her car is small, and her bumper was well below any impact. He told me which garage he had taken it to, and that it was a company car.
Research shows that she is approximately 90yrs old. They are very well heeled (millionaires). Irrelevant if the damage mentioned was realistic, but it absolutely isn't.
I wish I had taken photos of both cars, but didn't.
Am I within my rights to phone the garage to discuss this claim, or do I just have to suck it up? I haven't gone through insurance due to £500 excess.
I'd be totally happy to cover it if it was realistic, but there is no way that she needs a new bumper. I tapped her car due to a failure in mine.

Any ideas?

My dh had a very minor shunt at a roundabout, with both cars involved already moving in the same direction and at a low speed (his fault, technically). We found out later that the car he bumped claimed tens of thousands in compensation for whiplash injuries. No damage to our car at all.

It's quite astounding what people attempt to claim in accidents. A friend of mine had stopped at a pedestrian crossing on a hill (in snow) to let someone cross, and the car behind skidded into her, causing quite a lot of damage. They later changed their story to the insurance companies and tried to make out that my friend had skidded backwards uphill from a standstill into them.

Of course use your insurance.

As she is a third party claimant off your insurance she will also be entitled to hire a car whilst her car is in for repair. If her car has one of the same coloured bumpers then some come just with primer and have to be sprayed to match the car. This can take up to 3 days to allow drying etc (thus 3 days' car hire). My husband had a young girl drive into the back of his car and although the damage to his looked minimal the slight crack in the bumper would not be repaired and the respray etc before any car hire was factored in was £2k. The parents said oh but it was only a little bump. We said they were welcome to come to see the car and the car was at an approved repairer for our insurance company.

They soon decided for it to go through the insurance.

There is also the issue that once the bumper is removed there may be other damage which hasn't yet been found. an insurance assessor would be appointed to check this.

To be fair I am surprised the other party is prepared to deal with it outside of insurance I wouldn't. And also I wouldn't if I were you because the costs may suddenly escalte if there is as yet undiscovered issues.

If you have hit a smaller car in a 4x4 why do you think the other car would be less damaged? This makes no sense.

If you genuinely believe your car did not do the full damage (i.e. it was already only just hanging on with a bit of duct tape before your bump) you can make representations to your insurer. They have forensic mechanics who can analyse damage to be new/pre-existing. If you are found innocent, then it is not good news for the other party - fraud basically.

But insurers are not great fans of this so you need good reasons for them NOT to just go for the easiest option (which is your fault as a rear-ender)

Just go through insurance. You do realise the excess doesn’t apply to third party claims right?

Hand to your insurers.

Not a nightmare, no injuries. Lesson is not to drive so close that something unexpected means you cant stop.