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Changes to child arrangement order

29 replies

Runlovingmummy81 · 06/09/2017 23:43

I'm having the most horrendous time with my ex husband. He is a typical emotional abuser and narcissist so will do anything to manipulate the situation to his advantage and make life difficult for me and our 2 ds.

What have had a child arrangement order in place since Oct last year. Over a 2 week period nights are split 8/6 in my favour. This was decided by the courts as the best for the boys during the school week as it was predictable and stable. Holidays to be shared. So one half term each, the third alternates each year. Easter and summer holidays split and Christmas shared. This would be fine except because of how the order is worded as he has daytime care on a Monday it means I can never take them on holiday over a half term week. Whilst he will have 10 days if the weekends fall right.

I have emailed and sent letters asking him if we can. Have a reasonable discussion around this and come to an. Agreement. He says no and is sticking to the order.

The sends me an email booking his summer holiday over 10 days, my week and not in line with the order.

He refuses to discuss and sort out anything in advance. Ignores correspondence and doesn't put the boys first.

Cafcass were Involved as the police has also been contacted due to his behavior.

So my question is what do I do? I've requested mediation which he hasn't responded to.

All I want to. Do. It have my boys for a week over half term same as him and he won't allow it.

OP posts:
Runlovingmummy81 · 08/09/2017 11:47

Thanks. I hope. So. Xx

OP posts:
Runlovingmummy81 · 26/09/2017 13:49

Mrsbertybibby if this was presented to you as a problem with the order what would you do and how would you respond to his unreasonableness to even discuss with me? X

OP posts:
Runlovingmummy81 · 26/09/2017 22:49

Bump

OP posts:
bibliomania · 28/09/2017 10:23

I'd echo CaptainM's advice. If you can give your ex the impression that you're absolutely delighted with having more free time, you might find he gets resentful that he is "baby-sitting" for you and suddenly his demands for extra time start to recede. Obviously I'd only advise this if you're confident that the dcs are looked after properly with him.

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