Leave to remove & divorce help please, I'm overwhelmed

[MyPupPaisley]

Does anyone have experience with applying for leave to remove particularly if it was done before divorcing/separating from their DP? I've met with a sol, spoken to women's aid, rights of women etc and although I'm slowly piecing together what I need to do, I'm still feeling extremely out of my depth & confused.
My stbxh has a history of being violent, emotionally abusive and controlling towards me. We have 2 DC's together, aged 1 & 2, he doesn't help with them at all, despite having strong opinions on how they should be raised (as well as how everything should be done). I'm so tired of putting up with it and trying to please him, I've finally realised that he is abusive (not just moody) & accepted that I need to get out of the relationship for the sake of our DC's as much as myself. Both my stbxh & I were not born in the UK, my family live in one country and his live in another, so we are very much alone here aside from one sibling of his & I would like to relocate back to my country of birth to be surrounded by family and to start fresh.
Most forums I've read in regards to LTR involve relationships that have already ended, in my case It hasn't ended (he's very much unaware what I'm planning) and it's been suggested that I apply for a non molestation order, an occupation order & LTR all at the same time. I assumed that a divorce application would happen alongside that too (and I assumed that splitting the equity in the property we have would cover all court fees etc.) but in a meeting I had with a solicitor who specialises in LTR he mentioned that I would look into divorce from the country I'm hoping to relocate to once the LTR is concluded. Does this sound right? I guess I'm trying to work out the logistics of it all. One of my concerns is that my extremely sneaky and calculating ex will start to siphon off his assets asap as he will assume a divorce is coming once he's hit with these other orders. And if I'm packed up and moved abroad, how will I know how to divide our assets & possessions? Any other general advise for approaching a Leave to Remove case is much appreciate.

Thank you so much for your reply Familylawsolicitor I've had some really good advise from a sol who specialises in this area & he has told me it's not easy but also thinks I have a strong case. I know I need to be able to paint a really clear picture of what our future lives would look like in the new country from now till DC's are 18. So I'm planning on making contact with schools, doctors, sports clubs, language schools (stbxh native language is not English & I want them to be able to continue to learn his language) as well as job agencies in my industry & hr departments at specific companies, I studied my degree there & have lots of contacts in the industry so I'm confident I'll be able to get work, however due to my DC's being so young, this will need to be balanced out with nursery. I will have my semi retired parents who are more than happy to offer childcare too. We would also live with my parents initially on a large rural property with an orchard, dogs, chickens etc but still within an hour drive to one of the most livable cities in the world (not in Europe). Without any doubt I will be much more comfortable financially & the DC's will have amazing opportunities there. The alternative, if I have to stay in the UK (and this in not about me wanting an excuse to leave the UK, I'm sad to do it but I genuinely think it's the best option by far), would mean me working a job that would not cover nursery fees (which I would need because I do not have a single person who could care for DC's to allow me to work), let alone rent, bills, food etc. With zero emotional support which I desperately crave (my mental health has been on the decline and I'm finally about to start receiving professional help). I live here on a visa which has no recourse to public funds, so I would have no access to benefits of any kind, either.
My stbxh also has two DC's from a previous relationship, who he has not seen or attempted to make contact with in a long time (over 10 years) despite only living a few miles away, I feel that this gives an indication of how he will be once we no longer live together. He also has a history of drug and alcohol abuse, as well as a decent criminal record & currently I still think some of his business dealings may be illegal. Do these things have any impact?

Do you think that he might be advised to begin the divorce process once he is served with the non mol, occupation & LTR? In that case would that be delay the LTR proceeding?
I understand what you're saying about it being difficult to determine finances &
I don't hold much hope of getting much child maintenance from him as he's very good at keeping his earnings very low (he has his own business & an excellent accountant), so I guess I was thinking that if I at least the equity in the house was split, I'd be guaranteed something for the boys future & I won't need to worry about chasing CM from another country. But, I'm really confused how to approach that & I guess I just want to get my head around the possible scenarios.
So it could be that IF LTR was granted, It would be reasonable to assume that I would either have to come back to the UK to divorce, or I could also do it from the new country but it may not be to my advantage? And would the costs be greater in the second scenario too?

Sorry, final question, is it possible/advisable for me to file for a divorce at the same time as all the other orders?

Bump

Thanks for the tip babybarister I do plan on doing that, but I won't see him again for a while & I'm struggling to switch my mind off with questions. The MN community seems so supportive and helpful I thought I would look to here for shared advice and experiences in the meantime. The world of divorce and family law is completely foreign to me & I'm just trying to figure it out as best I can with what's available to me