Really need advice mumsnetters!!

[MyNewKitchen]

Ladies... I need advice. If you would be so kind. In a nutshell, I managed to leave exH four years ago. He was physically and mentally abusive. I was removed from my home with a police escort for safety. He attacked me in front of social worker and was arrested. He admitted to gp and crisis teams he had been hitting me and had thoughts of hurting DS. I have social services reports stating no unsupervised contact. We had a handful of sessions at contact centre, he repeatedly failed to adhere to their rules and cancelled the sessions 2 years ago. I offered him contact but he declined. I have a letter from the centre stating this. He is obsessed he wants unsupervised contact. He has been treated for drug overdoses, and was arrested for gbh. He then attacked me (violating restraining order) in front of Ds and he was sent to prison. However a month ago i was sent court papers from him taking me to court for contact. He has lied on the form repeatedly. Wrong address, ticked NO for all the DV and criminal history boxes etc. States i have withheld contact, which i offered but as it was only contact centre i would offer he refused. Have also never had and CM from him. What are his chances of the judge giving him unsupervised? I assuming cafcass will make him do a min number of sessions at a centre due to violent past? Its such a minefield and the cab were useless. Any advice would be much appreciated x

Get your papers in order and go to a solicitor's office. He clearly should have no access to your son if he was prepared to hit you. I really REALLY would strongly recommend you go as it is well worth the money. He has been arrested for beating you and is lying on documentation already. A report from the arresting officers should be obtained (go to the local station and ask them can they provide reports etc. and if you were admitted to hospital / G.P. clinic for medical attention because of his beatings, try and obtain same ). Solicitor will hand these into judge and explain he has a history violence etc. Solicitor will obtain these reports etc regardless to build case. Explain to solicitor he has not shown interest in child and never bothered to pay maintenance. Do not let this man near your child. If he is given contact it will most certainly be supervised. I don't think any judge would let him near a child unsupervised.

He is quite right to answer no to the "any form of domestic violence" question on p1 of the form. That is asking if he wants to allege that you or others with whom your child has contact are violent towards your son. It is not asking him to admit his own DV. That is something for you to bring up. Similarly the boxes on p15 forwards are for him to say that he is asking for exemption from mediation because of your DV and give evidence of your convictions for DV. He cannot ask for exemption from mediation due to his own DV.

Maintenance and contact are separate issues. When considering contact the court won't be interested in his non-payment of maintenance.

The other things you mention (incorrect address, stating you have withheld contact) are more of a problem. Given the history I would expect any contact to be supervised, at least initially.