Marriage / buying property

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Please excuse my ignorance on this matter and I hope I am making sense, without giving too much away about my circumstances.

Is it always better to buy a property together after marriage in regards to what I would be entitled to if we split up ("no bedding without a wedding")? Having come from a history of abusive relationships, I want to make sure I am safeguarding myself and my DC's future.

Can anyone please explain, in layman's terms, how this works??

Not necessarily
ExH and I bought a house after we got married, using proceeds from the house I owned before we got married (sold) and his flat which he owned and we lived in (remortgaged and kept)

Because he was a much higher earner than me, we got a much better mortgage deal if the house was only in his name so I wasn't on the mortgage or deeds.

However, when we split up, it was seen as a marital asset (I paid towards the mortgage, but not half) and I got half of what it had gone up by, plus my share of the equity that we had put in to buy it.

His solicitor played very hardball on everything, but didn't at any point suggest I wasn't entitled to half of the uplift. I was also given joint conduct in the sale - ie I had to OK the appointment of the agents, plus the offers

It was no different to as if I had been on the deeds in the eyes of the solicitors and judge

Thanks Sparechange

Just trying to digest your post!

So what you are saying is - if your ex had bought the property on his own, and then put your name on the deeds - you would have been entitled to the same as what you actually got?

Anything you buy after the date of your marriage - a house, art, gold bullion - will count as a marital asset and be split equally if you break up

Anything bought before you are married, but that you contributed to - a house in his name - might be split equally if you can prove that you contributed to it ie paid for a new kitchen, paid half the mortgage.
Adding you onto the deeds after you get married doesn't automatically mean you will get half of it, if he wants to fight it and prove how much he put in before you met/married.

Also, adding someone to the deeds isn't as easy as MN threads make out. There is usually stamp duty to be paid, as well as legal fees and can end up costing a lot if it is a valuable house

I have no assets or savings and live hand to mouth on an OK wage.

My DP earns a lot more than me and will be getting a lump sum in the next couple of years - which would mean he can put a deposit down on a property. I would not be able to contribute to this down payment. We are not married but are talking about it.

I am worried of moving out of my council house - if I lose the council house and then our relationship falls through...I would effectively become homeless.

Sorry I am so confused about what to do, if anything. I have the security of council flat but want the family home with DP. But I am scared and don't know what to do for the best in case it doesn't work out

If your marriage fails you will be entitled to a fair share of the assets of the marriage. That includes things bought before you are married - it isn't just stuff purchased after you married. It doesn't matter whether or not your name is on the deeds. It all goes into the pot.

A fair share isn't necessarily half the assets. It may be more or less than half depending on the circumstances.

But why should I be entitled to any of a property if I haven't contributed to the deposit and pay only say, half of the mortgage per month?

Sorry if I am being really dim

Because marriage is a legal contract as well as a romantic one, and the legal part of it says that assets acquired during the marriage are joint assets.

You can decide that morally, you don't want to take as much as you are legally entitled to, but that would be your decision.

Your fiance should also be aware of the legal side of a marriage and therefore what it means for things he has bought if you were to split

But if we aren't married before we purchase...that is different?

DP has been divorced so knows about the legal side of things. I on the other hand, don't have a clue. I have suggested seeing a solicitor before we buy and drawing up some kind of agreement or something, so that in the event of our relationship breakdown, we know where we are. He is happy to do this. But I would like to be clued up before all of this...

What I want to know is whether to tell him I want to wait until after marriage before we buy.

You need to see a solicitor, and you need to decide if you both want a deed of trust and/or pre-nup

If you buy the house while living as a married couple (ie engaged, living together, wedding is planned), they may well count it as the same as if you were married.

But you need to get legal advice on this.

If your fiance trying to avoid putting you on the deeds/mortgage, or is this your concern?

The property would be in both our names, DP is certain on this.

I just don't know how it is fair if I can't contribute to the deposit. He is happy to pay the deposit and then I can contribute to the mortgage. But definitely both our names would be on the property. 100%

Will need to google "deed of trust"

the legal part of it says that assets acquired during the marriage are joint assets

No, the legal part of it says that all assets are joint assets regardless of whether they are acquired before or during the marriage. If it is a short marriage the fact that an asset was purchased before marriage by one of the partners may mean they are able to keep it but it is not guaranteed.

That apart, sparechange is right. Marrying someone means that you are committing to each other financially. If you subsequently divorce you are entitled to a fair share even if you haven't contributed a single penny towards the property. But, just to repeat, that does not necessarily mean you will be entitled to half the property. That depends on a range of factors.

You won't be able to sign the agreement/deed unless you've taken independent legal advice or it won't be valid. So, do that now.

But if we aren't married before we purchase...that is different?

No it isn't. When you marry the property would become a joint asset regardless of whether or not it is in joint names.

You could get a deed of trust or a pre-nuptial agreement but neither of these is binding. The courts will take them into account but won't necessarily follow them.

I must admit I am a little confused. You started out worried that you would end up with nothing if you marry him and then divorce. You are now worried about taking things from him in this situation and are talking about doing something to reduce your entitlement. Given the situation, you don't need a deed of trust or a pre-nup to protect your assets. It might be a good idea for him but, unless he wants one, I would not recommend reducing your legal protection by going down that route.

Sorry, my posts must be reflecting my brain...muddled. Thank you for keeping with me :)

Thank you all for replying, I am digesting all the info. My mind is just not designed for all this legal stuff.

I just need to get my head around what is going on, what can happen in every eventuality.

Do I:

1. stay in my council flat for security and live separately from DP, staying with him on weekends and holidays
2. buy a property together without being married, move in with DP and lose council flat
3. stay in council flat until we are married, and THEN buy a property together. Move in, and lose council flat

Its the thought of losing the council flat (and my own security) that terrifies me. If we split up, would I be able to cope, money wise?? That is my fear.

In situation 1 you keep the council flat but have no entitlement to anything else. Breaking up would be straightforward.

In situation 2 you will be entitled to 50% of any property you purchase jointly with your DP unless you enter into a deed of trust giving you a different share. Once you marry you would be entitled to a fair share of the equity in the property if you divorce.

In situation 3 you would be entitled to a fair share of the equity in the property if you divorce.

In all situations you would be entitled to maintenance for any children you have with him. If you marry him you may be entitled to spousal maintenance.

Thank you bridge.

That is exactly how I needed it spelled out to me. I really appreciate it.

Now I need to decide what to do...

Some of the posts in here assume a long marriage. If divorce follows a brief marriage, the courts generally try to put you back in your pre-marriage position. The 50% split only happens if the marriage lasts long enough (though I believe we're only talking a couple of years here).

I'm not sure which posts you think assume a long marriage. Everything goes into the pot regardless of the length of the marriage. The OP would be entitled to a fair share. What constitutes a fair share depends on a number of factors, one of which is the length of the marriage. As I said in my post on 12th June at 13:08, if it is a short marriage the parties may be able to keep the assets they purchased before the marriage but it is not guaranteed.

ThePants

But the courts will count the time pre-wedding that you were living as married.

So while ExH and I were only married for 3 years, we lived together for 3 years before then, so the judge considered us to have had a 6 year marriage for the purposes of working out the split of assets

Aye, that's a good point.