Dear All,
I am posting on behalf of a friend who needs some legal advice. Almost certainly he will need to get formal legal advice, and if anyone has recommendation for a good family lawyer in London with reasonable rates, please PM me.
Situation is he has been divorced for several years and obeys the consent order to the letter (it is generous and well above the CSA amount), whereas the ex doesn't (maintenance is supposed to cover all expenditure on kids, but she seems to think it is only for stuff when they are with her). He has 3 kids and has them about 50% of the time.
He took a huge hit when they divorced - she got 90% of the proceeds of the house etc, and so has little / no mortgage, whereas he has a socking mortgage and very little disposable. He has a lodger to make ends meet.
The background to the split (not that it is legally relevant, but I know that Dads get a hard time on here) is that the ex had an affair and is living with her boyfriend with whom she had the affair (and has been since the split). The ex has earning potential but has up to now chosen to work in a lowly paid job, in receipt of benefits (plus nearly 2k maintenance - and I know that is not relevant for benefits). For what it is worth, I think (don't know) the boyfriend has a good job and no dependents.
Friend has v little disposable (good job, but massive mortgage and very high maintenance payments), and has taken the kids on holiday to stay with family, but can't afford to do more. His only holiday on his own has been subsidized by friends / airmiles. She has had several foreign holidays with the boyfriend to exotic places.
Now, she has asked him to pay more and increase maintenance by 300/month. This would require a variation of the order.
My question is whether she has any chance of success. Friend has no spare money, and is pretty parsimonious. He cannot afford to run a car (she does), has a lodger, and in order to be there as a good dad for the 50% of the time he has them, has not been able to take a more high flying job.
On the other side, she has a track record of financial irresponsibility and has not stuck to agreements to re-pay friend for kids sports lessons etc. He has let this go on a number of occasions as he is worried that she will take it out on the kids.
Before anyone suggests it, I am not directly involved here - I am not the OW or involved in anyway with my friend. I see a divorced dad who has done everything by the book, is a great dad, overly willing to help when the ex wants the kids to spend more time with him etc etc, who has no means of being able to comply with such an order (unless he sold house, moved away and therefore couldn't parent his kids as planned), whereas her lifestyle is in sharp contrast.
I had previously suggested that if she pushed for a variation he would probably be able to argue that as she doesn't stick to the agreement, maybe he could have it varied in his favour - he could pay directly for the kids activities / only give her 50% of the money for the time they are with her. I have no idea whether that would be successful, and he has never wanted to do that. It seems now that she has had legal advice to say that she could successfully ask for more money....it seems mad to me - does anyone out there, on the basis of this post, feel in a position to comment?
Thanks in advance!