Separation and divorce legal costs

[WaitWhatOh]

Just totally new in a world of separation and possible divorce and very lost.
How on EARTH do you afford a solicitor when I'm being quoted £150+ an hour. Where do I get that money? My husband has all the money and controlled what I got when so i wouldn't have access to such funds.
What do people do?how do people do it?
He says I don't need a solicitor and will 'see me right' with something on a bit of paper and that verbally agreeing stands up in law, so if he ever went back on his word I could sue him.
Is that right?!
I wanted a proper legal agreement but now wonder how if I can't afford it!!

Go and see a solicitor - most will offer a free half hour. I would never recommend that you agree anything (particularly with someone who says you don't need a solicitor!) without some basic advice. There are various ways of paying solicitor fees (eg paying at the end of the matter) so just go and speak to someone first of all and don't be bullied into accepting what your H thinks is right.

Hi Wait - I am just going through this. I have had to cash in my only ISA to pay legal bills. I did take my 30 mins of free legal advice and went with a list of questions.

Our legal separation agreement has cost me (I am paying for all of this) around £600 plus VAT. The Divorce, if I use a solicitor will cost around £1500 plus VAT - I should point out that STBXH and I are quite amicable and everything has been agreed.

The separation agreement is our 'clean break' financially, includes the fact I have bought him out of house, no further claim on any of my assets (including my pension) and agreed child maintenance. Once this has been signed I have the option to then wait the 2 years before applying for divorce, which I plan to do myself (£410). I am comfortable doing this as the separation agreement is tight.

With regard to your controlling husband. Find yourself a family solicitor and make sure he/she are aware of your situation, if there is abuse - financial or otherwise they could petition the court for him to pay costs. Protect yourself.

Hope this helps.

Oh Lordy. This sounds hard.
Okay. I'll email all solicitors local to me then.

Wait if you want to PM me about anything, please do. I'm still working my way through this myself & learning a lot!

OP you need to stand tall and realise that you have plenty of money. In fact you have probably at least half of everything your Stbx has. Go see a solicitor as soon as, and explain that he is financially abusive. They are used to this, may even manage to get an interim order so that you have access to YOUR money. How long have you been married op ? Any dcs ?

I've been married 14 years.
Two dcs
He's got lots of money when he needs it. But I suspect you couldn't find it all on paper...

You definitely need urgent legal advice and don't sign or agree anything with him until you do ( though it probably wouldn't be legally binding anyway). A good solicitor will be able to advise about litigation funding (basically a personal loan which is repaid when you recieve your settlement) or interim orders such as interim lump sum or maintenance to allow you to pay legal fees if there are sufficient income / assets around. It's a long shot but some solicitors may also agree to defer their final bill until your recieve your financial settlement ( you would have to pay a premium for this and enter into a binding agreement about payment. Unusual but not impossible.) good luck.

At the very LEAST half of everything earned during the marriage PLUS maintenance for the dc's ...that is what you are worth as a net value. So start thinking in those terms and go get it in your ac !!!

Going through similar myself. A friend of mine took out a Tesco loan at the end of her divorce with affordable repayments. I am considering doing something similar as you and I NEED a solicitor otherwise we will be ripped off by ex's. He will have to do a full financial disclosure - I suspect my ex has some secret bank accounts and not sure how to get him to disclose. As others have said, you will be entitled to at least half of any assets and may be able to pay out of this at the end. DO NOT agree to anything with your husband without legal advice. He wont see you right, he will rip you off and look after himself. Don't trust him at all. Divorce brings out the worst in people. Good luck.