Can marital home be left out of the loop in a divorce?

[Takebackcontrol]

I'd be grateful on any advice if anyone has similar past experience?

Together 10 years (married 2), children 4 & 6. Both in early-mid 40's. Separated 6 months. £240k mortgage with £30k equity (£15k owed to family for deposit - no time limit)
Husband has CC debt solely in his name of £20-25k+ (without my knowledge).
Zero savings each.
He wants to sell, pay off family and split equity (and doesn't want to pay anything off his debts) and both go off and rent somewhere separately. Assume £5-7k each outcome in equity after fees etc.
I don't want to sell and hold onto the asset for foreseeable future.
I work P/T and too old/poor to obtain a mortgage alone.
My STBX is in marital home alone (4 bedrooms) and has our children 1-2 nights a week.
I live with children in temporary accommodation and want to move back into marital home.
Mortgage is in his name (I've already registered interest with Land Registry).
I can afford 75% of the mortgage payment myself leaving him enough to rent somewhere and keep an interest in the property.

I know he absolutely doesn't want to go through the expense of using a solicitor. He also worries that a judge may 'freeze' the assets during divorce, use any proceeds from a sale to order payment of 'marital debts' which I assume would go towards his CC debts and not pay family first. There would be no equity remaining and we'd each potentially have legal bills to pay.

He could (bad credit/family help permitting) go on to have a new mortgage at some point as he earns £50k+ per year though this is only a possibility. I know him well enough to know he just wants some cash to spend.

I know it'll cost more for me each month to cover most of the mortgage but it might be my only shot at staying on the property ladder.

MY MAIN QUESTION...

If he agrees to it, are we still able to do a quickie divorce and leave the house as it is with a financial arrangement running between us or will it need to be addressed as a marital asset? I will of course, log all payments/pay mortgage directly for proof (he has a tendency to keep money and not pay bills) and perhaps revisit the possibility if a sale in the future - possibly if news spouses come onto the scene etc.

Even if he doesnt want a solicitor you should. What a mess.

How long have you been out of the family home? Would he move out or would that be a battle?

it's possible to agree your own financial settlement and submit this as part of the divorce petition for the consent order but you would need to agree the terms e.g.that he retain a financial interest in the property until a certain time.

Given he is currently living in the marital home it seems unlikely that he would agree to moving out though.

Occasionally it's possible to get a mesher order which would entitle you to stay in the family home until the children are eighteen, however these are not as common as mn'ers would have you believe, also, the fact that you are not living in the marital home at the moment would count against such an order being granted because the argument that you need the stability for the children loses weight when you have already moved them somewhere else iyswim.

You really need a solicitor though.

Not consulting a solicitor can be a false economy because you won't know where you stand and what options there are so you won't be able to make informed decisions.

There is only one divorce process and no such thing as a "quickie" divorce, they all take round about the same time.

In England & Wales divorce and finances are dealt with separately and unless there is a court order settling the finances on divorce the settlement isn't binding or enforceable. It is possible to make a separation agreement which can carry considerable weight when there is full disclosure, both parties take legal advice and the agreement is fair i.e. complies with the law. Then if there are problems later the court may turn the terms of the agreement into an order.

The problem with leaving the finances for more than a year or so is it can be more complicated and expensive identifying matrimonial assets and that can lead to difficulties when the time comes to separate finances. For example one of you may win the lottery. After a certain time it may also become difficult to prosecute claims.

Hmm, all very valid points. Thanks...

Move back in next week. Bring lovers back that will soon get him to rush to a financial arrangement or divide the house into two.