I'm seeking general advice from other parents who have found themselves in similar situations.
I'm late 20's, my partner early 20's. I have a teenage child from a previous long term relationship. We have a young child together.
We have been together for 5 years now.
My situation when we met was massively different to him. I owned (mortgage) a house, car, and worked in a FT reasonably well paid career. He lived at home with his mum, having never lived anywhere else. He worked in a part time (19 hours) low paid (just above min. wage) job.
He moved in a year later, and 2 years after that we had a baby together.
The situation hasn't changed much. I still have the mortgage in my name, I still work FT in a well paid career, and he still works PT in the same job.
I would view myself as my children's main carer, and others (HCP's, Childrens Centre workers etc) would view me as the same as far as I am aware.
Despite working FT, I work shifts, so I am around a lot more than most FT working parents.
So, my question is would I be taking a huge financial risk to marry my partner? He will say he has no interest in taking the house or toddler should we ever be in a situation where we separated.
I might sound greedy (and I really don't care if I do) but I would fight tooth and nail for my home. I was a teenage parent, and written off as a person. I worked incredibly hard to be able to buy a home and a stable place to live for my oldest child. Everything I ever did was for him, and his future. I went to university when he was 2, and worked 20 hours a week as well as a FT course (HCP - so full time shifts plus study). So I worked 60 hours plus study and raising a child for 3 years, then worked full time plus extra shifts for another 18 months in order to afford a mortgage (and pull us out of the poverty trap).
I bought it in 2008, so it was immediately in negative equity, where it has remained ever since. I was in a LTR with my son's father when I bought the house, but due to him being in and out of work plus a bad credit record, the mortgage was in my name only. So when we split up 8 months after buying the house, I was in a lucky position. He just moved out with his own belongings, we arranged access and maintenance and that was that.
I'm very worried about this. DP would like to be married, and so would I. But I feel I can't make sense of the situation. I discussed with my dad the issue, but he just said we are too young to get married 
. What he means is my DP is too young . I don't really know anyone in a similar situation where the woman is the main earner, and the man works part time (and did so before children). He hasn't given up his career in order to work PT. So, where would I stand if we were married? What is the worst case scenario?