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Will

8 replies

Firewall · 21/05/2014 12:38

Hi,

I wondered if anyone could give me some advice on writing a will. I have one child and am separated from his father, however we have agreed that if anything happens, our son would be cared for by my parents or my siblings. I don't have many assets but am saving for a house so obviously if anything happened to me I'd like all the money to go to my son... Or be used for him. Would it have to go in trust with a family member?

How can I go about doing this as I don't really have much money to spend on getting the will done but I know its important to have the childcare arrangements in place should anything happen especially as my son's father doesn't have any contact with his parents.

OP posts:
lostdad · 21/05/2014 12:46

A will isn't determinative about where a child lives if a parent dies. What you want (when you are alive or dead!) is irrelevant - the best interests of the child are paramount.

If you died and your ex decided he wanted your child to live with him he would have to make an application to settle the matter. The court would consider the best interests of your DS and make a decision using the Welfare Checklist as a consideration.

A parent who has little contact with a child would likely be in a relatively week position because it would represent a large change in circumstance for the child. There would be other factors however.

92littlecat92 · 21/05/2014 13:06

In terms of advice, many solicitors will give you 30 mins with them for free (here in Wales anyway)

Firewall · 21/05/2014 13:27

Ok, thank you. I currently live with one of my parents so my child has daily contact with a grandparent. He sees his father once a week. My ex has said should anything happen to him, he would pay my grandparents to look after our son. The concern is my ex's parents. They had a fall out, have not seen our son since he was a baby but send cards however they are very well off financially and the concern is that they may try to gain custody of our son should anything happen and claim they have the finances etc.

OP posts:
Firewall · 21/05/2014 13:28

I meant my parents not grandparents!

OP posts:
lostdad · 21/05/2014 15:25

Doesn't matter - what you want doesn't matter whether you're alive or not. Any application would consider the best interests of the child and that alone.

Putting what you want in the will is therefore pointless.

poshfrock · 21/05/2014 16:06

You can put an expression of wish in your will as to who you would like appointed as the child's guardians. This does not have to be the same person that the child lives with.The court would take your wishes into account but given that your child's father is still alive and has regular contact ( and presumably parental responsibility) then most likely your child would live with him. You could still express a wish that a guardian is appointed in addition but the court doesn't have to appoint one. Of course if your ex predeceases you then a guardianship appointment becomes more important.

What is important and does need to be put in a will is the appointment of trustees to look after whatever monies you may leave until your child reaches 18 ( or a later age if you wish). The trust fund is protected although funds can be released for education , maintenance and benefit which covers most things. I am a trustee for such a trust and we release money for clothes, swimming lessons, school trips, holidays etc.

Search for threads written by mumblechum1. She is a MNetter and also a will writer and has written very eloquently on several occasions about guardianship appointments. And she can do a will for you as well.

mumblechum1 · 22/05/2014 22:46

Thank you very much Poshfrock!
OP, as others have said, the appointment of a guardian is not binding on the court but if your child's father doesn't want to have him full time then you should appoint the guardian. Your will can then go on to express your wishes regarding contact
In the event of a dispute then those wishes would certainly be taken into account by the judge but would not be paramount.
It is very unlikely that you'd die before your child is 18 so the more important thing is to make a will setting out how you wish your estate to be distributed. A trust will arise if any beneficiary is under age and that trust is usually administered by the same people who you appoint as executors. Ideally, the guardians should be separate to the execs.
Sorry for brevity, I'm on holiday with just my phone, but feel free to PM me if you need any other info. :-)

mumblechum1 · 24/05/2014 13:23

By the way, you need 2 executors/trustees and a minimum of 1 guardian. If you are a bit short of people to carry out both roles then legally the guardian can also be an executor/trustee but I recommend that the second should be entirely independent, so for example if you wish to appoint a sister to be guardian and exec/trustee, the other exec/trustee should be someone like a close friend who would feel comfortable saying No to your sister if she made an unreasonable request for money to be paid to her from the trust fund.

Hope that make sense!

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